
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/578107.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Choose_Not_To_Use_Archive_Warnings, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
  Category:
      M/M
  Fandom:
      Harry_Potter_-_J._K._Rowling
  Relationship:
      Severus_Snape/Harry_Potter
  Additional Tags:
      BDSM, D/s, Teacher/Student, Angst, Romance, Child_Abuse, Mutilation,
      Stalking, Manipulation
  Collections:
      HPFandom
  Stats:
      Published: 2012-11-30 Words: 58177
****** Bruise Pristine ******
by Eriador117
Summary
     Harry feels the need to be punished, Snape isn't so sure. And that's
     not the only problem: who is stalking the Boy Who Lived?
Part 1
Grimmauld Place was an ugly, spiteful place and Harry hated it even more now
that Sirius was no longer there. He'd been there since the second week of July,
after Remus had come to call at the Dursleys' and discovered that Harry had
been locked in his room since the end of term, despite the Order's threats to
his relatives at the train station. Harry had known it would never have made
much difference. The Dursleys always did what they wanted, they didn't really
think that the Wizarding world would ever affect them.
Each day there was a different Order member on duty at the house to look after
him. Every member except for Snape, the man hadn't been anywhere near Harry
since school broke up. Kreacher was still skulking about the place somewhere
but he knew enough to stay out of Harry's way. Harry was so angry with the
house-elf that he wanted to kill him. He dreamed of it often enough and was
surprised when he woke up to find the elf still alive, if not well, he seemed
delusional at the best of times.
It was Dumbledore's turn to babysit him today and for the most part, Harry had
ignored the man and spent most of the time in his room, just lying there and
staring at the ceiling. He couldn't remember the last time he'd eaten and he
was in a state of almost light-headedness for the past few days. The world was
fuzzy round the edges, everything had lost focus, things were easier that way.
He didn't want to know how hard the world really was if it made him feel like
this.
In a few days he would be sixteen, Sirius had promised they would spend the day
together and do something special for his birthday, but it would never happen
now. Sirius was gone and the grief was like a burning ember beneath his
breastbone and sometimes he felt as if he couldn't breathe. As if he didn't
want to breathe. He wanted someone to pay. Someone had to pay.
It was Snape's fault. If he hadn't kept goading Sirius about being a coward,
Sirius would never have left. If Snape hadn't stopped giving him Occlumency
lessons, Harry would never have seen that false vision of the Ministry of
Magic. (Harry deliberately didn't think of the reason those lessons had ended
so abruptly.) It was Snape's fault. All of it.
***
"Harry, you've got to eat something," admonished Dumbledore when Harry finally
went downstairs. There was a plate of sandwiches and a glass of pumpkin juice
set out on the table for him. Harry took a bite of one and then set it back
down, everything tasted like ashes in his mouth. How could he think of eating
when Sirius would never eat again? He avoided looking at the headmaster, afraid
that he would feel that uncontrollable anger again, Voldemort's anger, but
underneath Harry knew there was some of his own anger too. Anger at being left
in the dark for so long.
"Harry, Professor Snape told me why he stopped giving you Occlumency lessons,"
Dumbledore said, twirling his beard. "You know why I can't give you those
lessons, Harry, but you do need to resume them."
"What?" The man couldn't mean what Harry thought he meant.
"You will apologise to Professor Snape for the violation of his privacy and you
will request that he takes you back for Occlumency, Harry."
"No," said Harry stubbornly, standing up so fast that his chair clattered to
the tiled floor of the kitchen.
"No? I'm not sure I understand you, Harry."
"I won't apologise to him! Not after what he's done! He killed Sirius!" yelled
Harry so hard he though his lungs might burst.
"Harry, you must do this. I insist," said the headmaster calmly.
"I don't care what you bloody insist on! I won't do it!" Harry ran from the
room, away from him, away from the memories crowding in his mind. The surprise
on Sirius' face as he felt the curse, the slow fall and Harry wanted to yank
every thought from his head, not have Snape poking round in there, berating
him, belittling him at every opportunity.
Harry stomped up the stairs, not caring if he woke the portrait of Mrs. Black
and made his way to one of the drawing rooms. It was lined with glass fronted
cabinets, filled with dark curios of all sorts. He didn't even know what half
of them were. It was the glass Harry was more interested in. He felt, he felt
coiled as if he wanted to snap in two, anger and grief welling up in him so
fast that he wasn't sure which he was feeling more. There was a hollow ache in
his chest whenever he thought of his godfather and it would never be filled.
Sirius was gone and he wasn't coming back.
Harry howled and grabbed one the chairs, throwing it at the first cabinet.
Glass shattered, shards flowing out and grazing his arms, but he didn't care.
He needed to feel something, something other than this hollow emptiness that
just wasn't getting any easier to bear as the days passed. He shattered three
more cabinets, blood dripping down his arms before he heard the voice of the
man he least wanted to see.
"Quite done with our little tantrum, are we, Potter?"
Harry's head snapped round so fast he was surprised it didn't fly off from his
neck. Snape.
"You think that's a tantrum?"
"Yes, you're a spoiled little boy who always wants to have things going his own
way. Yet again, you have given no thought to those around you. Destroying Order
property, damaging yourself so that people will feel sorry for you. I have news
for you, Potter. Acts like this will do nothing to garner anyone's sympathy.
You're pathetic, just like that mutt of a godfather."
"You bastard!" screamed Harry. "Take that back! Sirius was worth ten of you!"
Even as he said it, Harry's mind was drawn back to the pensieve and what he
saw. How his father, Sirius and the Marauders had bullied Snape, just because
Sirius had said he was bored.
"I believe the headmaster said you had something to say to me, Potter?" Snape
continued, as if he hadn't even heard Harry's outburst.
"I have nothing to say to you," spat Harry as he headed towards the door. Snape
reached out and grabbed hold of his right arm, the pain from his cuts flaring
anew at the contact.
"No, Potter? I believe you owe me an apology?"
"I owe you nothing!"
Snape squeezed his arm even tighter. Harry could Feel Snape's breath, hot in
his ear. He bit his lip when he felt the first stirrings of his cock, hardening
against the zip of his jeans. Not now! It couldn't happen now, not here, not
with Snape! "Are you sure about that?" snarled Snape, close to his ear. He was
so close, Harry could smell the man's soap and a hint of coffee. He was too
warm, too light-headed and he had to get away before his teacher saw, before he
knew the effect he was having on Harry.
"Let go of me!" hissed Harry, struggling out of the man's grasp. "I hate you!"
"I can assure you, Potter, the feeling is entirely mutual. I suggest you get
those cuts seen to. We wouldn't want them to become infected, now would we?" He
dropped Harry's arm so fast that it took a few moments for Harry to realise
that he was indeed free and could now move away from him.
Harry bolted upstairs, his whole body aflame, as if he could still feel Snape
pressed so close against him, could still feel the man's touch on his skin. The
small cuts on his arm were stinging and he was leaving a trail of bloody
droplets as he made his way up the stairs, but he didn't care at that moment.
All he cared about was getting to his room and having some privacy.
His cock throbbed in his trousers as he slammed the bedroom door and leaned
panting against it, the urgency he felt like nothing he'd ever felt before.
He'd touched himself, but it had never felt like this, as if he would go mad if
he didn't do something now. He barely had unzipped his trousers and cupped his
erection before he was coming almost immediately, spurting over his hands and
his clothes. He could still smell Snape, could still feel the ghost of the
man's touch on his skin, remember the pain as he'd held his arm.
Harry stayed hard as he thought of Snape and he rubbed himself frantically to a
second orgasm as he thought of the Potions master. His legs buckled as the
release left him, he landed flat on his arse by the door as he squeezed and
squeezed around his prick, he just couldn't seem to stop coming and he was
sobbing by the time he was fully spent.
It was the first time he'd cried since Sirius had gone and once started it was
like a dam inside him had burst open and all the grief, all the fear just
poured from him in waves. He wept for over an hour, resting his head on his
knees as he trembled and cried it all out. Harry could almost imagine Sirius'
voice in his ears, ashamed of Harry for what he'd just done.
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Harry sobbed to the empty room, not entirely sure what
he was sorry for or indeed who the apology was aimed at. He couldn't make it to
the bed, he curled up on the floor, hugging his misery to him as if it was his
only friend now.
***
The Order were wearing him down. No matter who it was, they all wanted him to
take the Occlumency lessons again, although only Dumbledore knew the reason
they had stopped in the first place. Harry didn't want to apologise to Snape
and he certainly didn't want the man poking about in his mind again, but the
nightmares and visions were getting worse and he was afraid he was going to
make the same mistake again. There was nothing for it, he was going to have to
say sorry to Snape. It wouldn't mean that he meant it.
The week before school started, he got his chance. It was the first time Snape
had been at Grimmauld Place since that night. A meeting had just broken up and
Harry caught up with Snape just as he was stepping into the Floo in the
kitchen.
"Professor Snape? May I talk to you for a minute?"
Snape paused, his hand still inside the Floo pot standing on the mantelpiece.
"Come to your senses, Potter, have you? Stopped sulking?"
"I wasn't sulking! I was grieving!" God, the man could rile him like no one
else could. He belatedly realised that shouting at his teacher was not going to
help his case.
"Oh, of course, our Golden Boy was grieving. After all, no one else has ever
lost anyone, have they?"
"I didn't mean it like that," Harry said quietly. "I - I wanted to apologise,
sir, about the pensieve. I won't do it again."
"Too right you won't, Potter, for I will not be so foolish to allow you
anywhere near my memories ever again."
"But - I thought - the headmaster said..."
"You thought did you, Potter? That makes a change, doesn't it? You thought that
you could come to me with an insincere apology and hope to sway me? I don't
care how bad the nightmares get or how many false visions the Dark Lord sends
you, Potter, you will never, never learn Occlumency from me ever again!" Snape
was so angry that his face was tinged purple and spittle flew from the corners
of his mouth.
"But, sir, I really need to learn it!" protested Harry, forgetting his own rule
about not shouting.
"You should have thought of that before you invaded my privacy! Was it fun,
Potter? Did you enjoy laughing with your little friends all about it? How the
great James Potter and his friends brought Snivellus down a peg or two?"
"No, sir. I - I never told anyone."
"And I'm supposed to be grateful?" spat Snape. "I'm supposed to be grateful
that you suddenly developed a conscience? Where was it in the first place,
Potter? You knew those were my thoughts, they were private and yet still you
looked!"
Snape's tirade woke up Mrs. Black's portrait and between her casting aspersions
on Harry's heritage and Snape's ranting, Harry just wished he could disappear
now.
"I - I'm sorry, sir," said Harry and this time he knew he meant it.
"Sorry just won't do, Potter. How do I know you're sincere?"
"Please, sir. I'll do anything to make it up to you."
Snape stared at him, arching his left eyebrow. "Anything?"
"Yes, professor. Anything."
"You will obey me without question?"
"Yes, sir."
"Very well, you will report to me for detention on the first night back at
school. After that we'll see about resuming your lessons."
"Yes, sir. Thank you, sir," said Harry, even though he was wondering what he'd
let himself in for.
 
Part Two
Harry could barely face his dinner on the first night back at Hogwarts. After
the feast he had to report to Snape for detention and he was dreading it. He'd
foolishly promised the man he would do anything. What was he thinking? What
would the man make him do? Whatever it was, Harry would do. He knew he needed
the Occlumency lessons again and if he had to be in detention for the entire
school year then he would do it.
"Harry, how could you get detention your first night back?" asked Hermione,
sharing worried glances at Ron. "What did you do?"
"It doesn't matter," replied Harry.
"Of course it matters!" hissed Hermione. "Harry, if Professor Snape is bullying
you, you should tell someone."
Since when would that stop Snape? He'd been unfair to Harry since he first
started school and although Harry now understood a bit better as to the reasons
behind it, it still didn't mean that it was right for Snape to take his anger
out on Harry because Harry happened to be James' son and looked like him. Harry
wondered if Snape would still have mistreated him so much if Harry had allowed
the Sorting Hat to place him in Slytherin after all. He wondered if Snape even
knew that the Hat had wanted to place him in Slytherin first.
Harry shrugged his shoulders. He couldn't tell them the reason he had detention
and he didn't feel like arguing about it all through the feast either. Harry
reached for a bowl of chocolate pudding and ate it, filling his mouth just so
that they would stop pestering him to talk, not that he really wanted to eat
it. Hermione clucked her tongue, still sharing those same looks with Ron and
Harry swallowed around the ball of anger that had suddenly lodged in his
throat. They'd been talking about him behind his back all summer no doubt, owls
flying between them. Except for his birthday cards, delivered by Dumbledore, he
hadn't heard from either of them all summer.
So Ron and Hermione wanted to discuss him, did they? Well, let them, he was
past caring by now. There was a psychopath out there intent on killing him and
Harry was going to make sure he wouldn't get the chance. It was probably best
if he didn't have friends anyway. Look what happened to people you loved, they
got hurt, they left you and Harry could not bear to go through that again. It
would be easier this way.
All too soon the feast ended and Harry saw Snape lead the new first year
Slytherins out of the Hall. As Snape passed the Gryffindor tables, he paused by
Harry and mouthed, "Fifteen minutes."
Harry nodded to show he'd understood the directions and a few minutes later he
left the feast and made his way down to the dungeons. It was early he knew, but
there was no point in going back to Gryffindor Tower, it would take ten minutes
to get there and back and by that time he would be late. Being late would
certainly not endear him to the Potions master, so Harry just waited by Snape's
office door until the man himself came gliding down the dungeon corridor, his
black robes billowing behind him like wings.
"On time, I see, Potter," he said, pointing his wand at the office door so that
it swung open on its own. "That's a good start. In." Snape stood by the door,
waving his hand to indicate that Harry should precede him in. Harry obeyed,
feeling strangely nervous. It wasn't as if he'd never had detention with Snape
before, but he somehow sensed that these detentions would be different. These
were something he'd asked for, he'd requested.
"Sit down, Potter," said Snape as he seated himself behind his desk. Harry sat
down on the chair opposite the desk, a ladder back wooden chair that was the
most uncomfortable item of furniture he'd ever had the misfortune to sit on. "I
must confess, Potter that I am surprised to see you here tonight."
"But, you said I had detention!"
"Number one, Potter. Whenever you are in this room you will call me sir or
Professor at all times, is that understood?"
"Yes, sir."
"Number two, you will not under any circumstances reveal what you saw in the
pensieve to anyone, is that clear?"
"Yes, sir."
"Number three, you will never speak of what happens in these rooms to anyone
else. No running to Dumbledore or the other teachers because you think my
methods are harsh."
"No, sir. I wouldn't."
"Number four, you will have detention with me each evening after dinner for the
next three weeks -"
"Three weeks?" gasped Harry and then belatedly added the "sir".
"Do not interrupt me again, Potter. Yes, three weeks. If you can manage to cope
with your detention for three weeks, then we will see if you were really
sincere. If I hear one complaint from you, just one to any of your friends or
to any of the other teachers that I am treating you unfairly, then this will
all stop and you will forfeit my promise to teach you Occlumency. Do you
understand?"
"Yes, professor."
"And now for your detention, Potter. It will be the same every night. You will
kneel on the floor of this office and you will remain still for as long as I
deem it necessary. When I say still, I mean perfectly still Potter. Your hands
will be by your sides, you may not move them to scratch nor can you shift
position once you've knelt on the floor. Well, what are you waiting for?"
demanded Snape.
"Sir, I don't understand..."
"I have explained what you must do, Potter. If you cannot follow simple
instructions, then how do you expect to master Occlumency? Do you wish to
renege on your agreement, Potter? Did you not promise me that you would obey my
instructions without fail?"
"Yes, sir," said Harry standing up and glancing at the floor, looking for a
good place to kneel. The flagstone floor was rough and uneven. Nowhere looked
particularly comfortable to kneel on for any length of time and Harry dithered,
wondering what he ought to do.
Snape tapped his fingers impatiently on his desk. "I'm waiting, Potter."
"Yes, sir," said Harry, sinking to his knees and resting his hands by his side
as he'd been ordered to do. He had no illusions on that score, it was an order
and he would be expected to obey orders until Snape deemed him sincere enough
to resume the lessons again.
Snape nodded lightly before accio'ing a heavy dusty book to him and began to
read. After that, he ignored Harry for the most part, except when he thought
Harry might have moved and his head shot up, his eyes glittered as he took in
Harry's position on the floor.
Harry had never been good at staying still. He was always active, even as a
child, much to the chagrin of the Dursleys. Knowing that he couldn't move made
it even worse, his skin felt as if hundreds of insects were crawling all over
his skin, making it itch. His knees throbbed, his back and shoulders ached for
holding the one stance for so long. A bead of sweat dripped from his forehead
and lay hanging there on the tip of his nose, he could see it just out of the
corner of his eye but knowing there was nothing he could do about it was almost
unbearable. Harry desperately wanted to move but he wouldn't give Snape the
satisfaction. He could do this. He could. He could.
"You are dismissed, Potter," said Snape, without even glancing up from his
reading.
"Thank you, sir," said Harry, struggling to his feet. His legs had gone to
sleep and his feet were stinging as the blood resettled itself again. The door
seemed even further away before he first came in and Harry just concentrated on
putting one foot in front of the other, his legs seemed to have turned to water
but he would not ask for the man's help. He could make it to the door by
himself.
"Tomorrow evening, Mr. Potter," Snape reminded him just as Harry reached for
the door handle and missed it by a few inches. What was wrong with him? Why did
everything seem so weird?
"Yes, sir," said Harry, finally managing to yank the door open, only to be
almost knocked over by Draco Malfoy who'd fallen into the room. Obviously the
young Slytherin had been trying to listen to their conversation.
"Mr. Malfoy, would you care to enlighten me as to why you were eavesdropping?"
Snape asked in a dangerous voice.
"No sir, I mean I wasn't eavesdropping," Malfoy tried to explain. "It's just
some of the first years were a bit upset after your talk and..."
"Really, Mr. Malfoy? Potter, return to your dormitory at once. You have only a
few minutes until curfew."
"Yes, sir," said Harry, almost running in his haste to get away from them.
Draco was lying, he was sure of it, but wouldn't Snape know being the skilled
Occlumens he was? He always seemed to know when Harry was lying anyway.
Why was Malfoy eavesdropping, or trying to, on Snape? Or was it Harry's
conversation he was so interested in? And on whose orders was he doing it?
Voldemort's? His father's? Was he even in contact with Lucius now that he was
in Azkaban? Did Azkaban allow visitors or letters?
He remembered Barty Crouch's confession about his parents coming to visit him,
but that seemed to be a one off thing and not something that seemed like a
regular occurrence. Or was Malfoy doing it himself? Where were Crabbe and
Goyle? It wasn't often Malfoy was to be found without his two sidekicks and
Harry was just getting more and more confused the nearer to Gryffindor Tower he
got.
Just as he was about to give the password to the Fat Lady, the door swung open
from the inside and Ron gaped at Harry. "There you are, mate. I was just going
to fetch you. McGonagall's been in, the headmaster wants to see you."
"Now?" queried Harry. He was tired, he ached all over and he just wanted to go
to bed and forget about everything for a while.
"We'll, she did say as soon as possible," said Ron. "Harry are you all right?
You look a bit pale."
"I'm fine, just a bit tired."
"What did Snape make you do? Scrub out the cauldrons without magic?" asked Ron.
Harry didn't answer. He had no idea how to explain Snape's new idea for
detention. He absently rubbed at the scar on his hand. I must not tell lies.
"I'd better go then," said Harry, turning round before Ron got a chance to
question him any further.
He wondered what on earth the headmaster wanted to see him for now.
 
Part 3
Severus Snape paced the headmaster's office, it was all he seemed to do in
there these days. He'd gone as soon as he'd delivered Draco Malfoy back to the
Slytherin dorms and interrogated him on the way. Not that he discovered much,
Draco was still adamant that he hadn't been eavesdropping. Draco would not have
discovered much with his own efforts either. Well aware that news of his true
allegiances if discovered had made Severus a very paranoid man. All the rooms
in his quarters were well warded and covered in silencing charms tied to his
presence. It wouldn't matter if doors were open or shut, if Severus was in the
room then no-one would be able to hear the conversation within.
"So, if as you think, he is spying, Severus, on whose orders? Voldemort's or
his father's?"
"I do not know, Albus, but my guess is he is working for his father or hoping
to avenge his father's imprisonment in some way. He thinks I should be doing
more in order to secure his father's release from Azkaban and since I haven't,
he does not confide in me as much as he used to. Either Potter or myself could
be targets for his rage, but in my bones, I think he blames Potter more than
me. Potter seems a much more likely target for him to go after."
"One of the many reasons I assigned you this duty, Severus. I know you will do
your best, as you do in everything you attempt."
"Albus, I am still not sure this is the wisest course of action to take in
regards to Potter," stated Severus. No doubt he was going to enjoy it, but that
wasn't really the point. Was it for the best? He wasn’t sure what Dumbledore
was trying to achieve, but he would do it because the man had told him it was
important and nothing more.
"He agreed, didn't he?" said Dumbledore. "He's accepted the detentions?"
"Well, yes, but he doesn't know what's going to happen in the future though. If
it gets out what I am attempting to do..." Visions of Azkaban flashed before
his eyes.
"It won't, Severus. I won't be telling and neither will Harry. By the time you
take him to the next stage, you will have him so well trained that he would
never think of disobeying you. I know of your ... reputation in this art. Rest
assured, Severus, you have my full blessing in this."
Yes, but none of the others had been Harry Potter, saviour and hope of the
Wizarding world. He would be lucky to get to Azkaban for what he was going to
do to the boy. The mob would lynch him if it was ever discovered.
"Thank you, headmaster," said Severus. He had the headmaster's blessing to do
what he'd been dying to do to the Potter brat for years now.
To punish him. To break him.
He would not disappoint.
***
The spiral staircase was already opened when Harry reached it, which was good
as he didn't know the new password. He passed Snape coming down as he was
coming up, almost near the top of the stairs. It was a very narrow fit and
Harry squeezed himself back against the wall as Snape passed him, even with
that small distance between them, Harry's prick gave an interested twitch as
Snape glowered down at him.
"What are you doing here after curfew, Potter?"
"P - Professor Dumbledore sent for me, sir."
"Did he? Very well, but make sure you go straight back to your dormitory
afterwards." With that, Snape snapped his cloak around his heels and swept down
the stairs so gracefully that it seemed he was floating rather than walking.
Harry stared at the steps a long time after Snape disappeared from view, his
groin and chest both feeling strangely painful.
The office door was already open when Harry stepped onto the small landing. He
knocked on the door with his knuckles before entering and Dumbledore rushed
from his seat to shake his hand. "Harry! Come in, come in!" Dumbledore beamed
at him and held out a small saucer of lemon drops. Harry shook his head,
feeling slightly sick.
The last time he had been in this office, Sirius had just died and Harry had
destroyed almost all of Dumbledore's possessions in his rage. They were all
fixed now, but he knew nothing could bring Sirius back and Harry blinked back
the tears that threatened to spill.
Harry stood by the man's desk, as Dumbledore rummaged about in the drawers for
something.
"Aha! Found it!" exclaimed Dumbledore as he emerged clutching a rolled up
scroll tied with a red ribbon. "You were supposed to get this on your birthday,
Harry, but all the red tape has only just been sorted through. The Ministry
demanded a wait of thirty days at least to make sure he was really dead."
Dumbledore handed him the scroll and Harry untied the ribbon, his eyes blurring
as he read the first line.
The last will and testament of Sirius Algernon Black.
Sirius, oh, God, Sirius. Harry doubled over as if he'd just been punched in the
gut. He felt sick and faint and he just wanted to grab a Time Turner and change
everything. Only he couldn't, for in their fight with the Death Eaters at the
Ministry, all the Time Turners had been destroyed. Sirius was never coming back
and the parchment in his hand was the proof of that. He had to face it, he had
to face it and get over it.
Sirius had left everything to him, not only Grimmauld Place but also a castle
in Ireland, two cottages on the Isle of Man and a chateau in France. The Blacks
had been very well connected, there were also acres of land with no buildings
on them at the moment as well as all the money in Sirius' vault, jewellery and
all the contents of each property. Added to his parent's legacy, Harry knew he
was now a very rich young man. It didn't make the loss any easier to bear.
"Thank you, sir," said Harry and folded the scroll again.
"Harry, about Grimmauld Place..." the man began delicately and Harry tried not
to laugh. He was a fool, they all pretended they were so worried about him, but
really they were just worried about their precious headquarters. For a split
second he felt like telling Dumbledore to stuff it, that they could just go and
find somewhere else for their meetings, but his anger faded almost as quickly
as it had come.
"The Order can still use it for headquarters, sir," said Harry. "It's not as if
I use it that much, is it?"
"Thank you, Harry. Do you have any questions about the will? You have read it
all?"
"Yes, sir. Can I go now?" For Harry was not in the mood for small talk.
"Harry, if anything is bothering you, you do know you can tell me, right?"
Dumbledore twirled his beard.
"I'm fine, sir," said Harry firmly. Dumbledore was the last person he felt like
confiding in at the moment.
"Very well, Harry. Good night."
"Good night, sir."
***
Harry had been in Snape's office more times than he cared to remember. His
memories of the place were always of something unpleasant. Detentions,
reprimands, Occlumency lessons - the reason he was here now.
His knees hurt and he shifted a little to try and get a better position on the
unforgiving flagstone floor. He'd mistakenly sank to his knees just where a
crack was digging into his knees. He could feel the ridge as it pressed into
his flesh, even through his jeans and school robes.
"Did I say you could move, Potter?" growled Snape as his head snapped up from
his desk. The quill in his hand was dripping red ink onto someone’s essay or
test. Snape never used anything besides red ink, for he never wrote anything
good on anyone's work. Unless they were Slytherins maybe. But Harry wasn't
friendly with any Slytherins to ask about their grades.
"No."
"No what, Potter? Have you forgotten already? You will address me as 'sir' at
all times. Do you understand?"
"Yes, sir," replied Harry, but he gave the man a defiant glare even as he said
it. Snape was bound to notice that Harry wasn't really using the title as a
term of respect at all. Harry was just so confused and angry. What on earth was
he doing spending his evenings kneeling in front of Snape's desk? Why did he
keep coming back?
Harry didn't understand it, why did the man want him kneeling on the floor? And
why was it that now when Harry himself entered the room, he knelt down even
before he was asked? It was bothering him in an indefinable way, especially
since the night before Snape hadn't given him his detention but sent him back
to his dormitory when Harry had knocked on the office door. He missed it, he
missed kneeling on the man's floor while Snape worked, sore legs and all. That
was something he tried not to think of too deeply.
"Please, sir, may I move?" asked Harry, his knees were sending little pains
through his body and he thought that maybe if he could just move to a smoother
part of the floor he would be able to hold his position for longer.
Snape scrawled something on a piece of parchment and looked at him. "No you may
not. Perhaps it will teach you next time to choose your position more
carefully."
"Sorry, sir," said Harry, hanging his head to hide the tears that threatened.
He didn't understand why he wanted to cry, his knees weren't that sore, but
Snape's blatant disregard for his discomfort was almost more than he could
bear. He couldn't cry here, not where Snape could see and berate him for it.
Harry swallowed down his distress, he'd had plenty of practice at that after
all and didn't move for the next hour until Snape stalked over to him, tilted
up his chin and said, "You are dismissed."
Harry cried himself to sleep that night, muffling his sobs into his pillow so
the others wouldn't hear.
***
Well, Snape was right about something at least. For the next three days during
his evening detentions, Harry made sure to look before he sank to his knees and
placed himself on a smooth part of the floor. On the fourth night, Snape was
not grading essays. He just stared at Harry the whole two hours, and Harry felt
himself flush under the scrutiny. No-one had ever looked at him so intently
before and he wasn't sure he wanted to be the centre of so much attention.
His heart was beating very fast and his hands were clammy, he wanted to wipe
them on his robes but he couldn't move, knowing Snape would never allow it. In
this room, he had to obey Snape's rules, even if Harry didn't quite know what
the rules were yet. His mouth was dry, but he never uttered a sound, not even
to request a drink of water. Was it some sort of test? Some way of training him
to defeat Voldemort? To see how still he could be? How silent? But if that was
the case, why hadn't Snape told him? Was it something else?
After the silence of the hours spent on his knees, when Snape spoke, it was
almost a shock. "You are dismissed."
Even more of a shock was the fact that Harry didn't want to leave.
 
Part 4
"Not another detention, Harry!" scolded Hermione. "What have you done this
time?" she fluffed up her scrambled eggs before taking another bite. It was the
first Hogsmeade weekend and he was supposed to be going with Ron and Hermione,
but Snape had other plans for him. Plans that probably involved sore knees
again, so why was Harry so eager to comply?
"Nothing!" he protested, angry that his friend would immediately jump to the
conclusion that Harry had been making trouble. If anything he was a lot better
behaved than he had been last term, with no Umbridge treating him unfairly,
he'd been a measure of calm. At least he thought so. Their new Defence teacher,
Professor Allen was very shy, but competent in the subject he taught. Maybe
this time they'd be able to keep one for longer than a year.
Harry hadn't told anyone else about what he'd seen in Snape's pensieve, or even
that he'd looked in it. He could almost imagine Hermione's grim disapproval.
You looked in his pensieve? Harry, I can't believe you violated the man's
privacy like that! Ron of course would want to know all the gory details of
what he'd seen and Harry couldn't tell either of them what he'd done in order
to merit all these punishments.
The more time he spent in Snape's office, the more he realised that he'd done
something really terrible and he deserved, no, he wanted to be punished for it.
It wasn't Snape who had got Sirius killed. No the blame for that was squarely
at Harry's door, even if no-one ever said it out loud to him. Everyone was
walking on eggshells around him as if Harry was going to snap in two at any
moment. And sometimes Harry himself felt it was more than likely.
It was Harry's fault for not trying harder at his Occlumency lessons. It was
Harry's fault for not being able to close his mind to the Dark Lord. It was
Harry's fault for not understanding the difference between a real vision and a
false one. It was Harry who looked into the man's pensieve, although he thought
he had good reason at the time. But no-one forced him to look, that was all his
own decision. Harry had betrayed the man's trust, how would Harry have felt if
Snape had looked into all of his personal memories? Harry knew he'd be angry
too, he was just surprised at the form Snape's punishment was taking.
"Hermione, last term I did something that I wasn't supposed to and these
detentions are my punishment, all right? Just be thankful we haven't lost
points over it as well."
"What did you do?" Ron asked around through a mouthful of sausage.
"I can't say."
"What do you mean you can't say? Harry, it wasn't something illegal, was it?
Was it because you'd used Dark magic at the Ministry?" asked Hermione, her
hands fluttering around her tie.
"Look, you can't tell anyone about this, ever," insisted Harry in a low voice.
"But - but I looked into Snape's pensieve when we had our Occlumency lessons.
I'm not proud of it, Hermione so there's no need to look like that. It was
wrong, I know it and I'm having these detentions because of it."
"Well, that's good, Harry. I'm glad to see you're at least taking
responsibilities for your actions," said Hermione primly.
"What did you see?" asked Ron.
"No, Ron. I will never tell anyone that, it's private."
"Since when have you cared about the greasy git's feelings?" huffed Ron, miffed
at missing out on the gossip.
"Just leave it, Ron. All right? It's none of our business and I'm ashamed that
I even looked in the first place."
Ron gaped at him, doing a very accurate impression of a landed trout.
"What, Ron?"
"Nothing, it's just you - you sound like you like Snape or something."
"Don't be ridiculous. I shouldn't have looked, no matter whose pensieve it was.
It's got nothing to do with how I feel about Snape."
Ron nodded and tucked in to the remainder of his breakfast, but Hermione was
giving Harry a very thoughtful look.
***
Harry ran into Filch on his way down to the dungeons, holding Mrs. Norris to
his chest like a baby. "You're out of bounds, Potter," growled Filch. "Only
Slytherins allowed in this corridor unless it's for class. No class on
Saturdays." Good grief, the man was filthy and he stank of stale sweat and
other odours Harry didn't want to identify too closely. Didn't the man ever
bathe?
"I’ve got detention with Professor Snape," sighed Harry, he just hadn't got the
energy to trade insults with Filch today.
"You'd better get going then, hadn't you?" Filch gave him a pleased smirk as he
wandered off, cooing nonsense words to his ugly cat. Harry shuddered as he made
his way to the Potions office. He hated that cat. The door was wide open, but
Snape was nowhere in sight. Harry knocked, wondering if he should go in without
permission and start his detention, he knew what he was supposed to be doing
anyway. They were all the same, as Snape had already informed him.
He knocked again and went in, since Snape did not emerge to let him in. Harry
took a look at the floor, trying to judge the most comfortable position and
sank to his knees, his robes pooling around him on the floor. There wasn't much
to see besides Snape's desk, as he could not turn his head to look at anything
else and whichever place he happened to fall to, he was always directly in
front of Snape's desk. Snape wasn't there, but there was something sitting on
Snape's desk that Harry had never seen before.
Instead of the usual parchment, quills and ink that usually decorated the man's
desk, there was only one item on it today. A cane, the paleness of the wood a
stark contrast to the dark mahogany desk and Harry felt himself flush. Whether
it was from fear or desire, he never quite knew, but there was no mistaking the
twitch in his groin. Harry kept his hands firmly by his side, as per orders.
He'd never been caned, Vernon had always used a belt on him, so it wasn't as if
he'd never known physical punishment before, but corporeal punishment had been
banned in Muggle schools for quite a few years and Harry had never given it
much thought until now. Was it still permitted at Hogwarts? Would Snape use
that cane on him as part of his detentions? Would it hurt more than a belt? For
it had always hurt when Vernon beat him with the belt and it had never been
arousing.
It hadn't happened for quite a few years now, but Harry could almost imagine he
felt the sting on his backside and the tops of his thighs as the belt came
down, again and again. He started trembling and tried to stop himself. Shaking
wasn't being still and Harry just felt that even though Snape was not in the
room, he would somehow know if Harry wasn't doing his detention properly.
Harry didn't know how long he knelt there before Snape finally entered the
office. Harry could hear the man behind him, but he didn't dare look round. "Do
you know what day it is, Potter?" the Potions master asked him, close to his
ear, his voice like a caress and Harry forced himself not to lean back and into
the body behind him. He could smell Snape, a lot different than the odours
coming from Filch, that was for sure. Snape smelled of apples and freshly mown
grass, Harry couldn't help the small intake of breath through his nose to hold
the scent to him as long as possible.
"Um, Saturday, sir."
"Correct, but that is not what I meant. This is your final detention, Potter.
On Monday evening I will schedule our first Occlumency lesson for this term."
What? It couldn't have been three weeks already, could it? The time had seemed
to fly so quickly. Harry was getting used to these detentions, dare he even
think it, he was enjoying them? Just kneeling on Snape's floor, no words, no-
one asking if he was all right every ten minutes, no watching Ron and Hermione
bickering then making up and snogging in full view of everyone else. No having
to pretend to be all right because he knew everyone was watching his every
move. Snape watched him too, but Harry knew it was different.
"What do you say to that, Potter?" said Snape, walking round and standing in
front of Harry. Harry did not even move his head up to meet the man's gaze, he
was as still as a statue, the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed the
only movement.
"S- sir, I don't deserve it," Harry whispered brokenly. "I - I need to be
punished more, sir."
"Are you questioning my judgement in this matter, Mr. Potter?"
"No, sir. No, but I do think I need to be punished more."
"You think so, Mr. Potter? Very well then. On Monday night, you will have one
hour of punishment and one hour of Occlumency. As before, you will tell anyone
who asks that you are taking remedial Potions. I suggest you mess up a few of
your potions in class to make the story more believable, your work there has
been rather adequate of late. Monday and Thursday evenings will be devoted to
your Occlumency and to your punishments."
Adequate? Did Snape just compliment him? On Potions? Harry felt as if he could
just fly out of the room.
"Thank you, sir," said Harry, still not looking up at his teacher.
"Very well, you are dismissed. No doubt you can catch up with your friends in
Hogsmeade."
"Please, sir, may I stay for little while longer?" Harry stared at the floor.
"Am I understanding you correctly, Potter? You want to remain here on your
knees in the dungeons with me, rather than go to Hogsmeade and find your
friends?" The man sounded shocked.
"Yes, sir, please."
"Very well, Potter. You may remain until lunch time, if you wish it." With
that, Snape removed a book from one of the shelves and settled down by his desk
to read.
The whole time Harry was there, his eyes wandered again and again to the cane
sitting innocently on Snape's desk.
Harry couldn't stop wondering how it would feel.
***
Severus watched Potter every so often out of the corner of his eyes, he knew
what the boy was looking at. The cane, sitting there in full view, but Severus
made no move to touch it. He never would.
Not until the boy asked for it himself. Snape grinned.
They always asked in the end.
 
Part 5
 
"What do you mean you're not going to the Quidditch match?" asked Hermione,
hands on her hips as she glared at Harry in the common room. Ron and the other
Gryffindor Quidditch team members had already made their way to the changing
rooms. He and Hermione were the only two left, everyone else was already at the
stands. Umbridge's ban was still in force and Harry was still not allowed to
play. "Ron will be so disappointed if you don't go, Harry."
"I just don't feel like it, okay?" he said, turning back to his Transfiguration
essay.
"You don't feel like much these days, do you?"
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"It's just - I don't know, Harry. You seem different, you're not acting like
yourself. I don't think these Occlumency lessons are agreeing with you."
"What would any of you know?" snapped Harry. "Do any of you really know me? Or
is all you can see this stupid scar on my forehead? Harry Potter, the Boy Who
Lived? Snape knows me. He's the only one who does."
"Harry, that isn't true. We're your friends," Hermione protested. "And - and I
think you're spending too much time with Professor Snape."
"What? Hermione, you were the one who wanted me to go back and beg him to give
me Occlumency lessons again."
"Well, I was wrong. The past few weeks since you've been having the lessons,
you've changed, Harry and not for the better."
Harry slammed his textbook on the table. "All right, all right. I'll go to the
bloody stupid Quidditch match, but don't expect me to enjoy it." Why didn't any
of them understand? He loved Quidditch, but he couldn't play it. Yet they
expected him to sit there, happy to just be a spectator when all he wanted was
to be up there on the broom himself. At Hermione's appalled look, he felt the
hand of guilt squeeze his chest so tight that it was difficult to breathe.
"God, Hermione. I'm sorry, I don't know what's wrong with me these days."
It was true, his emotions were all over the place. One day he would be as happy
as he could be, laughing and joking with Hermione and Ron like they'd always
done and the next he couldn't bear to be in anyone's company. Anyone's except
Snape's and if truth be told, he was a little worried about it himself. Why did
he feel this sudden attachment to Snape of all people? It couldn't be normal,
could it?
Harry knew that it had been some time since he'd felt his usual hatred and
antagonism for the man, he wasn't sure
when the change had occurred exactly, but he thought it had been before they
started on Occlumency.
"I think you're stressed, Harry," said Hermione. "You need to relax more.
You're doing so much, what with the Occlumency on top of your normal classes,
it's bound to take it out of you."
"That's no excuse to take it out on you and Ron, though," said Harry.
"Harry, I think I know what you're doing. It's because of Sirius, isn't it?
You're trying to distance yourself from everyone because you think you might
lose them too, aren't you?"
Harry turned in his chair, trying to hide that he was crying. "I still m- miss
him, Hermione, I miss him so m- much," sobbed Harry. "If a - anything happened
to you or Ron I don't think I - I could b - bear it."
Hermione knelt down in front of him and wrapped her arms around him in an
awkward hug. "Ssh, Harry. It's okay, you're allowed to miss him, but please
don't push us away just because you think you might lose us too. We want to
help you, Harry. Please let us."
Harry cried, his tears staining the neck of Hermione's robes, but she didn't
seem to mind. He clung to her like a shipwreck survivor might cling to passing
log and he felt a little better after he'd cried himself out. Hermione handed
him a clean, lace edged handkerchief with HG embroidered on the corner once
he'd finished crying. Harry tried to hand it back, but she insisted he keep it.
"Is that why you're spending time with Snape, Harry? Because you think you
wouldn't miss him so much if he was gone? That he's safe to be friends with?"
Harry stared at her, he hadn't really given it much thought until now, but he
knew that if something did happen to Snape, he would miss him as much as he
would miss Hermione and Ron.
***
Harry was glad he went to the Quidditch match in the end. He was caught up in
the excitement of his fellow Gryffindors and only felt a little pang that he
wasn't the one chasing the Snitch. Ginny remained as Seeker, although not as
good as Harry, she could hold her own and managed to catch the Snitch right out
from under David Parson's nose, the seventh year Ravenclaw Seeker.
The cheers from the Gryffindor supporters surrounding them were deafening and
Harry's throat was raw from his own shouting. Gryffindor had won by two hundred
points to one hundred and twenty. The first Quidditch match of the season and
already they were looking good for the Quidditch Cup.
"Thanks, Hermione, for making me go," Harry grinned at her. "I think I needed
that."
"You sure did," said Hermione, giving him a quick hug. "I want to go and see
Ron to congratulate him! Did you see those saves? He's really getting better at
this, isn't he?"
"He is," agreed Harry.
"Coming?"
"You go on, I'll catch up with him later," Harry gave her a knowing wink. He
was feeling very generous today and knew that the two of them would probably
like some private celebrating time of their own.
"Thanks, Harry. You're an angel," Hermione gave him a quick peck on the cheek
before rushing down the stairs of the stands. Harry sat there for a while as
all the stands emptied of spectators, just enjoying the silence. Sometimes he
just liked to be on his own. He knew the common room would be full of noisy
celebrations and he didn't want to face that quite yet.
Madam Hooch waved to him as she collected up the Quidditch equipment. She
disappeared beneath the stands, returning a few minutes later mounted on a
broom and flew up to where Harry was sitting, she landed on the front of the
stands and sat down beside him.
"Do you miss it?" she asked him.
"Yeah," replied Harry, his throat tight.
"Thought so," said Madam Hooch and she accio'd a broom to her and held it out
to Harry. "I also thought you might like this back."
It was Harry's Firebolt, the one Sirius had given him and he quickly blinked
back tears. "But Madam Hooch I'm still banned."
"You're banned from playing Quidditch, Harry, not from flying. Umbridge should
have worded her decrees better, shouldn't she? One lap round the pitch for old
times' sake, what do you say, Harry?"
"Thank you, I'd like that," said Harry. Madam Hooch got up and mounted her
broom, zooming away. Harry stood up and stepped up to the front of the stand.
It happened so quickly, one second he was about to mount his broom and the next
the floor of the stand had collapsed beneath him and he fell right through,
screaming in pain and terror, the he could hear and feel his bones breaking as
he fell through the struts.
Harry was too shocked to even try a spell, Madam Hooch cast a levitation charm
on him just as he was inches from the ground and she hurried over to him as
Harry just lay there, trapped between the supporting struts of the stands and
the flying instructor's spell. The spell had done nothing except stop his
descent, he was still in pain, still screaming when the woman reached him.
Harry couldn't see what was wrong with his legs and hips, but he could feel the
pain. He tried to move his head, but it wouldn't budge, the charm preventing
him from moving any part of his body. He couldn't even talk.
"Harry, I'm going to get Madam Pomfrey, all right? You'll be fine, don't
worry."
When she said that, it was all Harry could do.
***
"Thank you, Severus," said Poppy as she took the vials from Severus' hands and
placed them on her store shelf. "If you do get some time, can you make some
Dreamless Sleep as well? A lot of the first years are having nightmares at the
moment and I'm running low."
Severus didn't doubt it, the reported Death Eater attacks were getting more and
more frequent and it was more and more common that the casualties were related
to those students still at Hogwarts. "Very well, Poppy. Anything else?"
"No, I think that's it for now. I wonder -"
"Poppy! Oh my God! Poppy, come quick, it's Harry!" screamed Madam Hooch as she
came skidding to a halt in front of them, her flying robe billowed behind her
like wings.
"Harry? Harry Potter?" asked Severus, his heart leaping into his throat. He
followed the two of them without invitation as Hooch led them back to the
Quidditch pitch. Potter was nowhere in sight, but a broken broom lay on the
ground beside one of the stands. "He wasn't flying?" Severus demanded.
"No," snapped Hooch, "I was going to race him around the pitch, but when he
stood up, the floor just collapsed beneath him."
"What do you mean?" asked Poppy. "He fell from the stands?" They all looked up
at the pennants fluttering in the heights and shuddered.
"I managed to cast a levitation spell on him before he hit the ground, but he
was already injured by that time. The struts," said Hooch as she cast aside the
lower curtain and they all went inside. It was not a pretty sight, Harry's
limbs were twisted, both by the spell and the wood. His legs were at an awkward
angle and on the left one, his robes had been ripped, as had the skin beneath,
blood trickling from a large gash near his knee. A shard of bone was sticking
out through his left shin.
"Was he unconscious when you left him?" Poppy demanded as she cast scanning
charms over the boy's still form.
"No, he was lucid."
"Well, he's unconscious now," said Poppy. "Broken legs, broken arm, fractured
pelvis. Thankfully his spine seems to be fine, but he's going to be in a lot of
pain for a few days while he heals. What happened, Rolanda? These stands are
always checked for safety before every match."
"They are," agreed Madam Hooch. "I did it myself this afternoon, there was
nothing wrong with this stand then."
"Could you have made a mistake?" asked Madam Pomfrey as she tended to Harry,
splinting both his legs while he was still knocked out.
"It's possible, but if the stand was unsafe, why did it only break when Harry
stood on it? There were hundreds of children who passed that same spot and
nothing happened. Wouldn't it make more sense if there was the weight of more
than one person on it? And Harry isn't exactly heavyweight material, is he? The
poor boy's skin and bone." Hooch shivered as she caught a glimpse of Poppy
trying to put the bone back into place, probably regretting her choice of
words.
"Do you need me to help get him back to the infirmary?" asked Severus.
"No, we can manage, Severus, why?"
"I just thought I'd do a little investigating around here," said Severus. He
left Potter in their tender care and made his way up to the top of the stands,
going very carefully. The tower was a little wobbly after Harry's dive through
the supports. Severus edged closer to the gap of wood at the front and waved
his wand around. As he'd thought, it was a magical flaw in the wood, tied to
Harry's magical signature. It would look fine and if anyone other than Harry
walked past it, nothing would happen to them. But if Harry walked past, then
the spell would activate and the flawed wood would collapse.
It was a trick Death Eaters had used in the last war to ambush Aurors and
Snape's right hand curled around his left forearm. Surely there weren't Death
Eaters in the school? They would never get past the wards, would they?
How else to explain the stand collapsing? For there was no doubt in Severus'
mind as to what this was.
This was a deliberate attempt on Harry Potter's life.
 
Part Six
 
Harry had to stay in the infirmary for days, he was unconscious most of the
time and when he wasn't, Madam Pomfrey dosed him with pain and calming potions.
He was healing, but as the bones knitted together, it hurt. A lot. He was just
glad they'd got to him in time. Madam Pomfrey had already told him that he was
very lucky, even five more minutes and they might not have been able to heal
him properly at all.
Ron and Hermione visited him when they weren't in class, although Hermione kept
giving him his homework, he wasn't really feeling up to it, but Harry did it
anyway, just to have something to pass the time. It wasn't his best work though
and he didn't think he would be getting perfect grades on anything he'd written
while laid up in the infirmary.
When Harry had been in the hospital wing for about a week, he found it hard to
judge time dipping in and out of healing sleeps as he was, Dumbledore came to
see him along with Professor Snape. They both looked very grave as Dumbledore
sat down on the chair by Harry's bed. Snape stood behind it and Harry couldn't
fathom the look that was in their eyes. Snape cast a strong silencing and
warding charm round the bed. Harry sat up straighter, feeling his heart thud
like a drum in his chest.
"Harry," began Dumbledore. "I know we've had our differences, but I hope you'll
understand that what we are doing is for your own good. Your injuries, your
fall, Harry. It wasn't an accident."
"Sir? You mean someone damaged the stand deliberately?"
"I'm afraid so, Harry," replied Dumbledore, patting Harry's knees through the
bedclothes.
"That wasn't all, Potter. It was a trap, set for you."
"What? Someone at Hogwarts is trying to kill me?" The one place he thought he
would be safe from that at least.
"It certainly seems that way," said Dumbledore. "Which is why I am appointing
Professor Snape as your bodyguard as soon as you leave the infirmary. I know
there has been some - tension between the two of you, but Harry, Professor
Snape is the best man for the job and he has agreed to this duty. I'm hoping
you will be gracious and accept his help."
"Will you be following me around all the time, Professor?" Harry asked of
Snape.
"Not that you would notice, Potter, but I will be keeping an eye on you. You
will be able to spend time with your friends, go to your classes and everything
else as normal. The only difference is that you will no longer sleep in the
Gryffindor dormitories."
Harry stared from one to the other. "The safest place for you at night, Harry,
is in the cubiculum securus," said Dumbledore.
"The what, sir?"
"In essence a secret room, safe room if you will, Potter. You will spend your
nights there as when you are asleep is also when you are most vulnerable to
attack."
"The room itself is not actually part of Hogwarts," continued Dumbledore. "It
hasn't been used in years, but it is always ready for occupation. No-one must
know of your changed sleeping plans, Harry. You will go to bed as normal, wait
until your friends are asleep and I will give you an emergency Portkey amulet
which will take you directly to the safe room. It is keyed to you and only you,
so if even if it falls into the wrong hands, no-one else will be able to use
it."
"Shouldn't the others be protected as well?" asked Harry. "If there is a
murderer on the loose?"
"Potter, they are after you and only you. The wood was charmed to recognise
your magical signature and only yours. You are the only one who is danger right
at this minute, but if I discover who was behind this..." Snape trailed off and
clenched his hands into fists. Harry was shocked at how much the man seemed to
be upset as to what had almost happened to him
"So - so, Professor Snape will be staying with me in the room?" Harry wondered
why his tummy gave a little jolt at that news.
"Haven't you been listening, Potter? The headmaster assigned me the task of
guarding you. Where else do you think I'd be? I have to be there in the
unlikely event that the wards to the cubiculum securus are breached. Did you
think I would be most able to protect you if I wasn't even there? You had
better get used to it, Potter. You and I will be spending a lot of time
together until the culprit is caught."
"Okay," said Harry quietly. He wasn't sure how he should be feeling at the
moment. The pain from his injuries had mostly faded thanks to Madam Pomfrey's
care and hefty doses of Calci-Mend to help the bones heal. He felt he should be
more frightened that there was someone out there wanting to kill him, but he'd
spent so long worrying about Voldemort trying to do him in that he'd gone way
past anxiety about it long ago and was into what he could only describe as calm
acceptance. He wasn't afraid to die.
Dumbledore rummaged in his robe pocket, removed a gold medallion hanging on a
chain and handed it to Harry. There was an engraved eye in the middle of it and
where the eyeball should have been there was a small emerald. "This amulet is
only keyed to you, Harry. Whenever you press the emerald with a thumb or
finger, you will be taken straight to the safe room and Professor Snape's
amulet will give him a warning to let him know you've arrived there, if he
isn't in the room already."
"Thank you, sir," said Harry, placing the chain around his neck.
"Keep it safe, Potter," said Snape.
"Yes, sir."
"Well then, Harry, we'll let you get ready for class. Madam Pomfrey has
informed me you're well enough to leave today," Dumbledore's eyes twinkled as
he gave Harry the good news. Harry couldn't help smiling back. He spent enough
time in the infirmary as it was.
Snape was giving Harry a strange look, but Harry couldn't fathom what it was.
"Until tonight, then, Potter," said Snape, turning on his heel and walking away
in a billow of robes.
***
Severus' amulet vibrated at ten past midnight, so he knew Potter had already
gone to the cubiculum securus. He pressed the jewel on his own amulet and was
deposited almost immediately into the room. It was quicker than a normal
Portkey and there wasn't that same dizziness after travelling either.
The room itself was large, with pale pink carpet on the floor, pink and white
flowered wallpaper on the walls and the largest four poster bed he'd ever seen.
The hangings were white with small pink flowers embroidered on them and a large
pink and white striped bedspread covered the bed. It would comfortably hold
five, but only one would be using it tonight.
There were no windows, but a half open doorway led to a bathroom (thankfully
decorated in mostly white with just a few pink accents, Severus didn't fancy
bathing in a pink bath), where he could see Potter bent over the sink as he
brushed his teeth. Severus tried to ignore the stirrings in his groin, but it
was difficult, the brat looked so delectable bent over like that and he just
wanted to pinch him.
Potter turned round and Severus was delighted to see the little jump he gave
when he saw his teacher. "Professor! I didn't know you had arrived yet."
"Obviously," drawled Snape. "Tell me, are you naturally this oblivious all the
time or do you have to work at it?"
The boy flushed in embarrassment at the insult but didn't retort. That
certainly wasn't usual for a Potter. He stood hovering by the bed, getting even
pinker than the vile carpeting. "Um, sir, there's only one bed."
"I'm well aware of that, Potter, but rest assured your virtue is in no danger
from me," at least no tonight it isn't, "If you had bothered to explore your
surroundings with the same zeal you give to travelling out of bounds, you would
realise that there is a camp bed underneath the four poster. I will be sleeping
on it."
"Oh," said Potter, just as the overly large pyjama top slipped to reveal a
pale, milky shoulder. Severus wanted to lick it, the skin was just begging to
be licked and sucked and bitten. Bruised too, he wondered how purple and yellow
would look against the paleness of the boy's skin. Shaking his head to rid him
of those thoughts, Severus bent down and retrieved the camp bed from underneath
the four poster and erected it with a wave of his wand.
He removed his outer robe and transfigured it into a blanket. Potter tossed him
two pillows from the large bed and Severus gaped at him in surprise. He was
slightly discomfited by the gesture, that Potter cared even a little about his
comfort was an unusual situation to say the least and certainly not something
James Potter would ever have concerned himself over.
"Thank you, Potter," said Severus. The boy fell back on the bed, clutching his
chest dramatically.
"I think I've just had a heart attack," he had the gall to grin at him. "I'm
just recovering from the shock."
"What shock?" asked Severus as he made up his makeshift bed.
"You thanked me for something."
"I've thanked you before."
"No, sir, actually you haven't."
"Go to sleep," snapped Severus. They couldn't laugh and joke together, as if
they were friends. That wasn't part of Dumbledore's plan but ever since Severus
had seen Harry after his accident, he wasn't sure if he was the right person
for the job. He hadn't told Dumbledore, he hadn't told anyone, but he was
getting too attached to the boy and that did not bode well for Dumbledore's
plan at all.
Potter climbed into bed, he looked dwarfed in the large bed and settled down
under the covers, before casing a silencing charm.
"No silencing charms," said Snape, glaring at him. "I need to know if you have
nightmares or visions from the Dark Lord. I need to hear everything if I am to
do my job of guarding you properly."
"You don't need to hear everything," mumbled Harry and Snape turned away to
hide his grin from view. Ah, the joys of being sixteen and slave to hormones.
Their enforced retreat was certainly going to be interesting.
 
Part Seven
Harry lay on the wide four poster bed, listening to Snape's light snoring. This
felt a lot different to being in a dormitory with four other boys. This was a
man in the room with him. A man who Harry was beginning to think of more than
just his teacher, his protector. Harry often found himself staring at the man's
lips, wondering how they would taste.
He watched Snape all the time now, in class, at meals, whenever he caught sight
of him in the hall and always Harry would have the same reaction. He would
flush and get hard, wanting nothing more than for the man to reach out and
touch his cock. Not that that would ever happen, Snape had given him no
indications that he thought of Harry as anything more than a student. Harry
wanted to be more than a student. He wanted to be worth something to someone.
He wanted to belong to someone. Snape. He wanted to belong to Snape. He wanted
to curl up next to Snape in the giant four poster and feel the man's breath hot
in his ear and along his neck, feel biting kisses all around his neck, like a
necklace of bruises branding him as Snape's.
His one and only kiss with Cho Chang had been a disaster and he was in no hurry
to repeat the experience, except maybe with Snape. He hadn't really given girls
much thought since he'd been back at school, he never drooled over the pretty
ones like Ron did, earning Ron glares from Hermione. Girls just didn't interest
him like that, he realised now it was probably why things hadn't worked out
with Cho. He just wasn't into girls. Owl the Prophet, Harry Potter was gay. He
was just surprised it took him so long to figure it out.
He didn't quite know why Snape was engendering these feelings in him. Maybe it
was because Snape was older, more experienced and might even teach Harry
something, for Harry hadn't a clue. He had no knowledge or experience beyond
his own right hand.
Harry didn't know when his feelings had started changing, he just knew they had
and now more often than not, he wasn't suffering from nightmares at all but
dreams of an entirely different sort. Dreams which featured the Potions master
in a starring role and left Harry sticky and breathless when he woke up, the
main reason why he'd tried to cast a silencing charm around the bed in the
retreat. How was he supposed to explain to Snape if he called out the man's
name in his sleep or something? Snape would probably hex him into next week and
save the would be murderer the bother.
So far Harry had managed to block all of those memories and dreams away during
their Occlumency lessons, but Harry knew it was only a matter of time before
Snape accessed them. What on earth would he do then?
Harry glanced over at the sleeping man. Was he really asleep? Snape was facing
him, the camp bed almost the same height of the four poster and he looked a lot
younger sleeping, his face smooth and unlined.
It was their fifth night in the retreat and Harry was suffering a little from
sexual frustration. He hadn't wanted to touch himself with the man right there,
but his attempts in the shower the past few mornings had been thwarted by well
meaning friends, wondering if he was all right after the attempt on his life
and he had to hurry to get to class without even starting.
His cock was insistent, pressing up against the blankets and Harry knew from
past experience that if he didn't take care of things now, then he ran a real
risk of definitely having sticky sheets in the morning and he didn't want to
have to face Snape after that. If he just wanked now, he could clean up with a
spell and hopefully Snape would be none the wiser. Being sixteen was hell.
Harry removed his pyjama bottoms and turned over on his stomach, moving his
head to the side so that he was facing the sleeping Snape. The man wasn't that
close to him, the bed was so wide, but Harry could almost imagine that Snape's
head was on the pillow next to him and Snape was kissing his neck, his ears.
Harry stifled a groan as he thrust down against the mattress, loving the way
his cock was trapped between the mattress and his stomach, the pressure on his
cock a welcome relief. Harry gripped the pillow in his fists and his hips
pumped faster and faster on the bed, he wanted to come so badly, worried that
Snape might wake up before he'd finished and he needed this, God, he needed
this.
Harry's eyes fluttered closed as his orgasm drew near, the vision of a sleeping
Potions master shimmered behind his eyelids. Suddenly Harry was there, spurting
his release onto the sheets beneath him, muffling his cries, "Sir! Sir!" in the
pillow, tasting feathers and damp cotton. He lay there for a while, feeling too
languid to move, not even caring about the wet patch beneath him until it began
to grow cold and not very sexy.
Harry waved his wand and cast a cleaning charm over both himself and the bed,
squinting with one eye to make sure Snape was still sleeping before pulling his
pyjama trousers back up and grinning from ear to ear. It had felt good when he
bit down on the pillow, he wondered how it would feel to be kissed as he came,
would that make it even better?
He gave one last lingering look at his teacher before finally succumbing to
sleep.
***
Potter was flushed as he settled himself on the bed the next night and Severus
had to stamp down on the grin. No wonder, if that's what he got up to each
night. For Severus had been far from sleep the night before, wondering what the
boy would do if he thought Severus was asleep.
He didn't think Potter would risk masturbating right there in the room with
him, he hadn't even gone to the bathroom, which had a lock. Severus hadn't seen
much from beneath his lowered eyelids, just the steady rhythm as Potter humped
the mattress, but oh the wonderful sounds he made as he came and the flush on
his cheeks as he reached his peak, were enough to have Snape wanting to reach
out and lick the sweat from the boy's skin.
Snape stretched, trying to get rid of the kinks in his back.
"Sir?" asked the boy.
"Yes, Potter?"
"Um, we can share the bed. It is big enough," he said.
"That would hardly be considered appropriate," said Severus, even though he had
been hoping for an invitation.
"I won't tell anyone, sir. You can't be comfortable on that thing. It's too
short for you, your legs dangle off the edge."
So he'd noticed, had he?
"If you're sure?" Severus asked again.
The boy nodded and pulled down the covers. Severus climbed in and cast a spell.
"It's a shield barrier," he explained. "So we both stay on our own side of the
bed." Dumbledore may have given him permission to dominate the boy, but he
hadn't given permission to seduce him.
"Goodnight, sir," he said, turning over and seemed to fall asleep straightaway,
much to Severus' disappointment. He'd been rather looking forward to the show
and this time he was going to see if Potter would be interested in some
audience participation. Severus was lying down propped on one elbow and just
gazing at Harry's shoulder where the pyjama top had slipped again.
"Potter? Are you awake?" he asked.
No answer. Potter did truly seem to be asleep and Severus sighed in
frustration, his cock pounding with blood beneath his nightshirt. Suddenly
Potter moved to lie on his back, arching it like a human bridge and let out a
moan that had Severus leaking in his underwear. "Snape! Oh, sir, Please!" the
boy moaned again, his fists gripping the bedclothes beneath him in his fists.
His knees were bent and there was a tell tale tent beneath the bedspread. Was
he dreaming?
Harry turned again, this time clamping himself right round the Potion master's
body, how on earth had he got through the shield barrier? Harry's leg twined
itself with his and he began rubbing his erection along Severus' thigh and
groaning loudly.
Severus knew the right thing to do would be to wake the boy up, but at that
moment, he didn't care about the right thing, he was enjoying this too much. It
was so wrong, so forbidden, but oh so delicious. An armful of squirming,
aroused Harry Potter, even if he was asleep. In the end, he couldn't do it. Not
like this, not with Potter asleep and not knowing what he was doing. "Potter,
wake up," he whispered, giving the boy a slight shake.
"S- sir? What? What's going on?" gasped Potter, opening in his eyes to stare
into Severus' face. He blushed as he tried to extricate himself and then his
eyes widened when he realised the situation, the situation being that he was
humping Severus' leg like a dog in heat. "Oh, sir, I'm sorry!"
"Hush, Potter. It's all right. You were sleeping and had a dream. Nothing to
worry about."
"I didn't mean to." The boy flushed again and hung his head, Severus could
still feel Potter's erection pressing into him as he was sure the boy could
feel his.
"You were talking in your sleep," continued Snape, not releasing him quite yet.
"You seem to have developed a fascination with me, Potter, did you realise
that?"
"I'm sorry, sir," he said, shamefaced.
"Don't be. I find myself equally fascinated, as you may have gathered that
isn't my wand digging into you."
Potter gaped at him, mouth opening and closing like a goldfish. "The question
is, do you want me to do anything about it?"
"Sir?"
"Students and faculty affairs while not banned are certainly frowned upon and
you would have to keep it a secret, whatever might happen between us."
Potter was no longer making any move to escape from his arms and even seemed to
shimmy a bit closer.
"You - you like me? Like that?" His green eyes were sparkling in the small lamp
from the bedside table. He sounded so surprised, as if he had no idea of his
own worth. And hadn't that been one of the problems he and Dumbledore had been
trying to fix?
"I do, Harry, I do."
The boy gasped on hearing his name and much to Severus' surprise, Harry lifted
his head and mashed his lips against his. It was awkward and clumsy, but
certainly enthusiastic. After about five minutes or so, Severus pulled away and
just looked at him.
"Harry, we don't have to rush things," he said quietly, his cock throbbing in
protest. "We don't have to do anything tonight if you don't want to."
"I don't know what I want," Harry said finally. "I've never - I've never," he
waved his arms to encompass the both of them. "Can you just - can you just hold
me?"
"Do you want me to?"
"Yes, please," sighed Harry and snuggled closer, tucking his head underneath
Severus' shoulder. "I've never been held like this before."
Below the sexual frustration that he was still feeling, Severus felt something
else. Awe at how quickly Harry had grown to trust him, despite their past
differences. Relief that Harry had finally seemed to think that he deserved
more than being punished for things that were not his fault.
Severus just hoped that Harry never found out what Dumbledore had ordered him
to do.
 
Part Eight
The first letter arrived on the third day after Harry and Snape had first
shared the bed in the retreat. He couldn't think who would be sending him
letters now, unless it was maybe Remus or Tonks. Harry hadn't heard from either
of them since the fiasco at the Ministry and he wasn't sure anything they said
could make him feel better about it. It was Harry's fault Sirius had died,
maybe that's why they hadn't written before? They were still angry with him?
Harry felt the need to suddenly be in Snape's office kneeling on the floor and
he gripped the parchment firmly in his fist.
He didn't recognise the owl, a small tawny, he gave it a few owl treats before
sending it on the way. Ron and Hermione were looking at him curiously as Harry
made no move to open the letter.
"Who's it from, Harry?" asked Ron.
"I don't know, there's no return address."
"Well, open it then," suggested Hermione. "Then you'll know."
Harry shrugged, then slid his thumb underneath the flap to open it. The
parchment inside had been folded and folded again until all that remained was a
tiny square. Harry's hand shook as he unfolded it, he'd already guessed this
wasn't from Remus or Tonks, they never folded letters like this, as if they
were trying to hide what they'd written.
There were only a few words on the parchment, scrawled haphazardly across the
page.
I know what you are.
It didn't make much sense to Harry, nor going by their confused faces, to Ron
and Hermione. Harry glanced up just as Snape left the teachers' table after
breakfast. "I have to go," said Harry, knowing instinctively that he should
show the letter to Snape. He caught up with the man just as he was descending
the stairs to the dungeons.
"Professor Snape, sir, can I talk to you?" asked Harry, following him down,
even though Harry's first class was Herbology and outside, not in the dungeons.
"Is this about the letter you just received, Potter?"
"How did you - " But of course, the man was looking out for him after all,
Harry really shouldn't have been surprised. "Yes, sir."
"Follow me," said Snape and led Harry into an empty classroom, not the Potions
one. This one was covered in dust and cobwebs, looked like it hadn't been used
for years. Snape locked and warded the door before holding his hand out. Harry
placed the letter in his professor's proffered hand and waited patiently as the
man scanned it with his wand.
"You have no idea who sent you this, Harry?" Snape asked, rubbing his chin.
"No, sir."
"They've been very clever, normally when you write, you leave behind a trace of
your own magics, almost like Muggle fingerprints, but there is nothing on this
letter at all to indicate who wrote it. Not one trace of their magical
signature remains, they've hidden it or charmed it away. Do you mind if I keep
this? I would like to perform some more spells on it to try and discover
anything else."
"No, sir. Do you want the envelope as well?" asked Harry, holding it out.
"It might help, yes," said Snape, removing it from Harry's hand and putting
both parchment and envelope in an inner robe pocket. "You'd better get to
class." Snape leaned close to him and gave him a quick kiss. Harry's breath
hitched, Snape had never initiated anything while they weren't in the retreat
before. He wondered what it meant.
"Yes, sir," said Harry as he reluctantly headed towards the door.
"Potter," said Snape just as he turned the handle. "You did the right thing in
coming to me."
Harry couldn't help the smile then as he hurried out, feeling as if he could
float all the way to Greenhouse Three.
Praise from Snape was rare indeed, but that only made it even more special.
***
The rest of the day passed uneventfully, although Ron and Hermione did his best
to pester him to try and find out who Harry thought had sent the letter. Harry
had no idea and he had no idea what they meant either. I know what you are.
Those words didn't seem to make much sense. What was Harry? A student? The Boy
Who Lived? A teenager? And why did the thought of someone sitting down, writing
those words and sending them to Harry send a shiver up his spine? They had no
proof, but Harry guessed it might have been from the same person who had
set the trap for him at the Quidditch stands.
The whole school knew Harry was banned from Quidditch, but not from spectating,
the culprit could be anyone and Harry was feeling slightly paranoid by the time
dinner rolled around. He was just grateful that it was Thursday and he had an
Occlumency lesson tonight with Snape, along with an hour's punishment. Just
knowing that he could go to the man's office soon was calming him down.
Harry just toyed with the chicken pie on his plate cutting it up into smaller
and smaller pieces, then mashing both pastry and filling together so it looked
like wallpaper paste and decidedly unappetising. Hermione stopped him
mutilating any more of his dinner by gripping his wrist firmly in her hand and
giving him a pointed look, taking in all the other Gryffindors staring at him.
Great, now they all thought he was crazy. Harry set his cutlery down and
couldn't face another bite of food. He sipped at his pumpkin juice until it was
ten to seven, then muttered to Ron and Hermione that he had to go to Remedial
Potions. They were the only two who knew that he was studying Occlumency, but
he hadn't told him about the punishments he still felt he wanted. He wasn't
sure how his friends would react to that.
Harry had never been caned by Snape yet, even though he stared at it a lot. He
was curious as to what it might feel like but he was a little frightened of the
pain too. Snape had never touched the cane, but it always lay on his desk now
whenever Harry arrived and he felt the time had come for him to ask for it.
Maybe the physical pain would stop him thinking, for he was fed up of his
thoughts going round and round in circles. Sirius, the Ministry, the attempt on
his life and none of them were making much sense.
Snape was waiting by the door when Harry arrived at the man's office, his arms
folded across his chest. His hair looked shinier and softer tonight and Harry
had to clamp down on the urge to reach out and stroke it. That would probably
get him hexed into next week. Harry followed the man in and sank to his knees
in front of Snape's desk almost immediately. The cane was no longer on the
desk. Snape sighed and sat down.
"Harry, we have to talk," he said and Harry felt his heart flutter like
butterfly wings against his ribcage as the man spoke his given name. He loved
it when the man called him Harry. "We have to talk about your punishments."
"Yes, sir," said Harry, not lifting his eyes from the floor.
"Harry, please, get up and sit down on the chair," said Snape, sounding
exasperated.
Wobbling slightly, Harry got up and sat down, feeling strangely disappointed.
Snape was no longer going to punish him like this, Harry had done something to
offend him, he just knew it and Harry tried to swallow around the snitch that
had suddenly taken up residence in his throat.
"Harry, why do you still feel the need to be punished? Your detention is over,
I've already told you that and yet you still insist that you need to be
punished, why?"
"I - I don't think," said Harry.
"You don't think what?"
"No, I mean, when I'm kneeling on the floor, I don't think about the things
that are bothering me. I can only think of how hard the floor is or whether I'm
hurting, but it's a good hurt because I know that it will end soon. Physical
hurt always goes away in the end."
"And emotional hurt is more difficult to handle?" asked Snape, leaning forward
and gazing steadily at Harry. "Why me, Harry? Why do you want me to be the one
to give you this punishment?"
"Because - because I trust you," replied Harry, realising as he said it that it
was true. Snape was the only person he could trust with the knowledge that he
liked physical pain. "You would never really hurt me. You've always looked out
for me, even when I didn't know about it."
"Is there a sexual component to you liking pain, Harry?"
Harry flushed. "Not - not at first," he admitted.
"And now?"
"Yes, I keep wondering what it would be like for you to hurt me. The thought of
it - ar - arouses me."
"The thought of being hurt?" asked Snape.
"No, the thought of you hurting me." Harry wished the floor would open up and
swallow him now, he was bracing himself to hear Snape's laughter about his
fantasies, he already knew Snape liked him, but would he still like Harry
knowing that he wanted to be hurt? There was a steady silence, the only thing
Harry could hear was his blood pounding in his veins.
At long last, Snape spoke, his voice a register lower and Harry felt his groin
stir. "Have you ever been caned before, Harry?"
"No, sir," Harry replied breathlessly. Was he going to do it? Was Snape
actually going to do it?
"Then I don't think you're quite ready for that yet. Do you know what a
submissive is, a pet?" asked Snape.
"Not really, sir," admitted Harry, although he had a feeling he was going to
soon find out.
"You're half way there already, Harry. You feel the need to obey me, to kneel
for me. Do you want me to control you? To dominate you sexually? Would you like
to be at my whim? Would you like that, Harry? Would you?"
Harry had never been so hard in his life and his answer was whimpered. "Please,
sir, yes, I want that." Even before Snape asked, Harry slid to the floor again
and knelt with his head down, feeling hot and cold at once. Snape stood up and
walked round to Harry, tilting his chin up with long pointed fingers. Harry
could hardly bear the man's gaze, his eyes were just so intense.
"Harry, we are going to do this properly. Before we go any further, you must
tell me your safe-word. If I ever do anything that you don't want or find too
much to handle, say your safe-word and I will stop, do you understand? To be a
pet, submissive, is not to give total power over to someone else. It is to feel
safe enough to relinquish control and know that you are still in control
yourself, through your safe-word."
"So if I don't like something, I say my word and you will stop?"
"Exactly, Harry. Your word should be something that you wouldn't normally cry
out in the throes of passion."
Harry thought for a moment, he never really said much when he touched himself,
as he always tried to be silent.
"Um, McGonagall?" he queried.
Snape smirked. "Indeed, that will do admirably, Harry. And now I think, it's
time for your punishment. Stand up, Harry," commanded Snape and Harry obeyed at
once. "Remove your outer robe and fold it neatly on the chair," instructed
Snape. Harry did as he was bid, feeling a sense of nervous excitement build in
the pit of his stomach and lower still.
He was left in his school uniform and stood in the middle of the floor. Snape
pulled the armless chair from beside the desk and sat down on it. "Across my
knees, Harry," said Snape and Harry just gaped at him for a few moments. "That
will be one extra for disobeying a direct order. Would you care to make it
more?"
Harry hurried across the floor and settled himself across Snape's lap, his feet
and hands touching the floor, his glasses hanging precariously from his nose.
"I could make some trite remark about this hurting me more than it hurts you,
but we both know it would be a lie. This is supposed to hurt, it is a
punishment after all," said Snape as he brought his hand down on Harry's cloth
covered rump.
"Count them."
"O-one," gasped Harry, trying to ignore the burning in his backside. His
clothes were protecting him a bit, but it still stung.
"That was for James," said Snape and Harry nodded mutely.
Another whack across his backside. "T- two."
"That was for Lily."
Smack! "T- t - three," Harry whimpered, Snape's hand like a brand across his
arse. His cock was hardening, he could feel it pressing against Snape's thigh
and he hoped the man hadn't noticed it.
"Do you want me to stop, Harry? Do you need to use your word?"
"N- no, sir, I'm all right."
"Very well, that was for Cedric."
Whack! "F- four," Harry gasped, blood rushing to his cock at the impact.
"That was for Sirius."
By the fifth slap he was crying and trying to breathe through the pain.
"That was for the pensieve."
His hand came down again and Harry wailed in pain. He didn't think he'd be able
to sit down for a week after this.
"S- s- six," sobbed Harry, gripping Snape's lower legs, anything to distract
himself from the stinging in his backside.
Snape's hand didn't fall for the seventh. "That one, that was for you, Harry,"
said Snape as he caressed Harry's sore bottom, the touch soothing now, not
hurting and Harry cried even more. He didn't deserve to be soothed. It was his
fault all those people had died and he sobbed harder against Snape's legs. His
erection was long gone from the guilt flowing through his veins.
Snape lifted Harry up and sat him in the man's lap, being careful of Harry's
sore cheeks. "Ssh, Harry, it's over now. You've been so good, such a good boy,"
said Snape as he wrapped his hands around Harry and pressed Harry's head to his
shoulder. Harry's glasses were digging awkwardly into his face, but he didn't
care.
"I- I'm not good," sobbed Harry. "I got them killed! I got all of them killed!"
"No, Harry, you didn't. None of this was your fault. It was Voldemort's fault
and no-one else's. Don't let him do this to you."
Snape caressed his head, his neck, his back as Harry just cried and cried. He
didn't feel awkward or embarrassed at weeping in the man's arms. It felt safe,
comforting, especially after the spanking and Harry knew instinctively that
Snape was not going to berate him for this.
"I'm your master now, Harry, you belong to me. I won't let anything happen to
you, I promise," Snape kissed his hair and Harry never wanted to leave the
man's embrace.
It was the only place he'd ever felt safe.
 
Part Nine
Severus hissed in frustration as his latest spell caused the letter on his
worktable to turn to ashes. Seven letters in three weeks and they were still no
nearer to discovering the culprit, nor who had damaged the Quidditch stands.
Three weeks in which he spent nearly every night comforting Harry after
nightmares that left him shaking and barely coherent, he refused to talk about
them, just snuggled up even closer to Severus and lay there all night, not
sleeping for hours.
It was hard to see the change in Harry. From such an outgoing boy, he was
getting more and more nervous, Severus saw him jump at the slightest thing and
he was withdrawing into himself more and more, even Granger and Weasley were
having no luck in drawing him out. He was getting paler and thinner by the day,
the only colouring on his face were the purple shadows under his eyes.
Harry hardly ate and the other teachers were commentating that his written work
was getting better and better but that his practical spell work left a lot to
be desired, he just seemed to nervous or upset to cast spells and McGonagall
had informed Severus that one day in Transfiguration, he bolted from the room
in tears when Hermione Granger had turned a rabbit into a pair of slippers.
All Quidditch games had been cancelled until further notice, no-one wanted a
repeat of what had almost happened to Harry and Severus had already had a visit
from Draco Malfoy that morning, protesting the ban as unfair. "It's not as if
Potter would have been a great loss anyway," the blonde boy said and Severus
had to restrain himself from grabbing the boy by his robes and hurling him
against the wall. He ordered Draco out, that he had work to do and the boy
seemed glad to leave.
Severus pinched the bridge of his nose to try and stave of his headache. He had
never felt so out of control as he did when Draco had bad mouthed Harry, but
then he had never felt like this about anyone else before. His previous lovers
he could count on one hand, not counting the pets he'd trained for Voldemort.
Harry was both more than a pet and more than a lover. He'd never felt the need
to be constantly near someone, or this fierce protectiveness for someone
before. He knew that if he discovered who had hurt his Harry, he would not be
responsible for his actions. Harry belonged to him and him alone.
They hadn't yet progressed beyond kissing, but Severus knew it was only a
matter of time before they did. He wouldn't rush things. Harry was still a
virgin and he had no intention of scaring him away just because he couldn't be
patient with him.
Since the spanking, Harry hadn't needed to kneel on the floor anymore, but he
would do it if Severus asked him to, willing to obey any order Severus gave
him. Harry seemed to be such a natural submissive, but Severus was finding it
harder and harder to do anything that might hurt him. He seemed so fragile
lately, with the killer and the letters and Severus realised he didn't want to
do it anymore. Despite Dumbledore's orders, Severus had no desire to break him.
He wanted to - he wanted to love him.
***
When Harry arrived at the retreat later that night, he saw that Snape had
Transfigured the camp bed into a small table and chairs, set for two. There was
a small mountain of food on the table.
"Sir?" asked Harry, staring at the multitude of dishes sitting on the table.
"Harry, unless we're playing our games, you may call me Severus in here rather
than sir."
"Oh, oh thank you, Severus!" Harry smiled and wrapped the older man in a hug.
He'd missed him all day, it being Sunday, so no classes or Occlumency lessons.
Ron and Hermione had been gone all afternoon and Harry had been feeling more
and more left out. "So what's with all the food?"
"Since you haven't been eating in the Great Hall, it's up to me to see that you
eat."
"I- I'm not hungry." It was true, in fact Harry felt a little sick to his
stomach at just the amount of food there.
"Harry, please, you've got to eat. You're skin and bone as it is. I won't let
you starve yourself, I know you're scared and nervous, but I promise you we
will catch whoever is doing this to you. Don't do their job for them. They're
probably so happy that they've reduced you to not eating and terrified of your
own shadow. Do you really want them to win?"
Harry shook his head but he couldn't help how he was feeling. He didn't like
it, he didn't want to be scared of everything, he didn't want to jump at every
sudden noise or feel as if he was about to burst into tears at any minute, it
wasn't like him and he just wanted it to stop.
Snape sat down on one of the chairs and patted his lap. "Would you like me to
feed you, Harry?"
Harry nodded eagerly and clambered into the man's lap, sitting sideways on.
Snape began by feeding him slices of melon, the juice trickling down his chin,
Snape deftly licked it off and Harry moaned. Oh, he liked eating like this,
pity they couldn't do this in the Great Hall, he would probably eat a lot
better. "More?" asked Snape, close to his mouth. Harry nodded, not sure whether
he was replying to get more food or more licking.
Snape moved a forkful of tomato pasta to Harry's mouth and he swallowed it
eagerly, eating didn't seem half so bad with Snape feeding him. After the first
forkful, Snape kissed him hard and long on the mouth. "A kiss for every bite
you eat," Snape said then. "Your reward."
After Harry had been rewarded twenty times, he just couldn't eat anymore. His
cock was hard and straining against the crotch of his pyjamas and he just
wanted to keep kissing. "More," said Harry breathlessly and Severus reached
down to the plate again. Harry shook his head, "No, more kisses, please," he
begged. "Please." He knew Severus loved it when he begged.
Severus' eyes darkened as he lowered his face to Harry's and Harry lost himself
in the sensation that was kissing Severus. He could never get enough of the
man's lips and tongue and he opened his mouth wide as they kissed and kissed.
Harry could barely breathe but it didn't matter, all that mattered was the
man's mouth on his, the scrape of stubble against his cheeks and the sweeping
sensations low down in his belly.
Snape's hand moved, slipping beneath the pyjama top and he began toying with
Harry's left nipple, making it stand in a little peak. Harry groaned and his
hips bucked almost of their own accord, as if a string had connected his nipple
directly with his cock and balls and he clutched Snape's waist for dear life.
He'd never really thought of his nipples as sexy before. The hand moved lower,
caressing his chest, the planes of his stomach and then hovered by the
waistband of his pyjamas. Harry tensed a little, Snape must have sensed it for
he stopped kissing him and stared at him.
"Harry? Are you okay? Do you want me to stop now?" Severus was breathing
heavily and had two splotches of colour high on his cheekbones.
"I- I'm a little scared," he admitted. "But it feels good, please don't stop."
"Don't be scared, Harry. It's just going to be touching, I just want to make
you feel good, okay?"
Harry nodded and leaned his head on Severus' shoulder, looking up at the man's
face. "Can - can you keep kissing me?" he asked shyly.
"Whatever you want, Harry," smiled Severus as he leaned over and once more
claimed Harry's mouth in a heated kiss. Harry wrapped his arms around Severus'
waist again and tried to relax as Severus reached below his pyjamas and started
fondling his prick. It felt different to how Harry touched himself, more
intense, knowing that it was someone else doing it and he widened his legs so
Severus' hand could get a better grip. As the stroking became faster and more
frantic, so did their kisses, teeth clacking together, chest heaving with the
effort as Harry writhed on the man's lap. He was dimly aware of something hard
digging into his hip, but Harry was so far gone in his own pleasure that he
didn't register what it was then.
Severus rubbed him faster and faster, spreading precome around the tip and
Harry thrust his hips in a ragged rhythm, already he could feel a delicious
ache low down in his belly and the base of his cock and in a few more strokes
he was there, spilling himself in copious spurts over Severus' hands, biting
Severus' lip in his ecstasy. His whole body was trembling as Severus continued
to stroke and milk him, still holding him until Harry softened completely.
"Sorry," mumbled Harry, only now realising that it was Severus' erection that
had been digging into him.
"What for?"
Harry reached out and caressed the man through his trousers. "I didn't take
care of you. Do - do you want me to do that to you?"
"Not tonight, Harry. I just wanted to make you feel good, this was for you.
I'll calm down in a minute," he smiled then and kissed Harry, just a soft brush
of lips on lips, not to arouse this time, but to comfort.
"I was being selfish, wasn't I?" Harry asked from his perch snuggled beneath
Severus' shoulder. He should have touched Severus too, shouldn't he? Isn't that
what lovers did?
"No, Harry. You were just lost in the moment and it was gratifying to see it.
To know that I could give you such pleasure. It was beautiful, just like you."
Harry blushed. "Thank you, no-one's ever called me beautiful before."
"Then they're blind. And now I think it's time for bed." Severus cast a
cleaning charm on both of them, before standing up with Harry still in his arms
and placing him tenderly on the bed. Once Severus was settled, he opened his
arms in invitation and Harry scooted across the bed and cuddled up next to him.
That night, Harry slept free from nightmares.
***
Just as the sixth year Gryffindors were coming out of Transfiguration the next
day, the seventh year Ravenclaws were getting ready to go in, but David Parson,
the seeker, stayed behind for a moment or two. "Harry, I wondered if I might
have a word?"
Harry waved Ron and Hermione on, he thought David probably wanted to discuss
the Quidditch ban with him, but he was unprepared for what the boy said next.
"So, Harry. The next Hogsmeade weekend is on Halloween and I wondered if you
might like to go with me?"
Harry gaped at him. "Do - do you mean like a date?"
"Yes, you do like boys, don't you?" He didn't sound at all embarrassed to be
discussing orientation right here in the corridor.
"Er, yes, but I'm sorry, David. I can't go with you, I'm already seeing
someone." Severus would have a fit if anyone found out about them though, so
Harry just hoped David wouldn't ask who he was seeing. It wasn't as if Harry
could reveal it to anyone.
"Oh, okay then. Didn't hurt to ask though, did it?" He smiled then and made his
way to class and Harry hurried off to Care of Magical Creatures. He wondered
what Snape would say when he told him he'd just been asked on a date.
Harry smiled to himself. Maybe he'd get a spanking.
 
Part Ten
 
They had Potions just before lunch and Harry could barely concentrate on the
lesson, so focused was he on the teacher. Every time he caught a glimpse of
that dark eyed gaze upon him, he couldn't help remembering the night before,
when Snape had fed him and the touching afterwards. He spent most of the lesson
half hard and as red as a tomato, he was sure. Hermione thankfully didn't seem
to notice anything amiss, probably putting Harry's distraction down to nerves
at being in Snape's class, but she didn't know why Harry was so much more
nervous now.
"Time is up," called Snape, striding round the room and glancing in everyone's
cauldron. Harry had to tear his eyes away in case anyone noticed his new
obsession. He had a collection of them now, watching Snape walk, watching Snape
eat, watching Snape talk, watching Snape's eyes flutter closed as leaned in for
a kiss...
"Mr. Potter," the voice of his fantasies dragged him out of his reverie. "Yet
another dismal effort from you. See me after class." It was barely perceptible,
but Harry saw the small wink his teacher gave him and his heart sped up.
"Yes, sir," he agreed readily as his heart seemed to jump from his chest to his
throat. He didn't care if he missed all of lunch as long as he got to spend
some time with Snape.
"Rotten luck, Harry," whispered Hermione as Snape left their table and headed
towards Malfoy's. "I thought your potion was rather good today."
Harry could hear Snape singing Malfoy's praises, look at the exact shade of
purple his spot shrinking solution was, the right consistency, the correct
aroma. Malfoy earned twenty points for Slytherin and Harry bristled. He wasn't
bothered about the points, he was bothered by the way Malfoy was smiling up at
Snape, touching him on the arm and batting his perfect blonde eyelashes like a
bloody girl. "It's because you're such a good teacher," simpered Malfoy and
Harry felt as if someone had just punched him in the gut. How dare Malfoy touch
Snape and suck up to him like that! He had no right, Snape was his!
The bell rang before Harry had to endure much more of Malfoy fawning over
Snape, over his Severus.
"See you later," Hermione called as she left along with the rest of the class.
Once everyone else was gone besides the two of them, Snape cast warding and
silencing charms on the door. Harry hadn't moved from his desk, he had the
feeling that Snape was about to make up for last night's tenderness and that he
was in the presence of his master now.
"Stand up," Snape commanded as he walked round and stood in front of Harry's
desk. The voice was cold, but his eyes radiated heat and Harry hastened to
obey. He stumbled a little as he tried to get out of his chair. "Go and face
the wall."
"Sir?" Harry was confused at the order and stood in the aisle between the other
desks. Snape yanked Harry forward by his tie so that their faces were mere
inches apart.
"Are you disobeying a direct order?" Snape hissed at him.
"No, sir, no," whispered Harry. Snape let go of his tie, Harry took a deep
breath before heading to the wall and doing what he was told. He was unprepared
for Snape to wrench his arms backwards and grip both of them with his fist.
With his other hand, Snape pushed Harry's cheek harshly into the wall, Harry
could feel grit from the stones embed themselves in his skin and he panted for
breath. Snape leaned heavily on Harry's body, he could feel the man's very
prominent erection on the small of his back and Harry bit back a whimper, both
one of arousal and a small touch of fear.
"Do you think I wouldn't know?" asked Snape hoarsely. "That I wouldn't find
out? You belong to me. Only to me, do you understand?"
Harry nodded slightly, his movement hampered by Snape holding him, he didn't
think he could speak.
"You should have not been talking to that Ravenclaw," Snape continued as he
pressed against Harry.
"How did you - "
"I did not give you permission to speak!" snarled Snape as he yanked Harry's
head back and clamped his mouth around Harry's neck, sucking hard. Harry
thought he might have fallen to the floor if the man hadn't been holding him
up. "Do you feel that?" Snape pushed his erection firmly along Harry's back.
"That's for you. Your punishment for flirting with Parson. You'll be on your
knees," Snape paused, panting for breath, Harry could feel the air brushing
along his neck and ear and he shivered with desire. Snape released his hands
and stepped away from him, Harry couldn't stop the small whine of protest as
the well muscled body was removed.
"Put your hands on the wall above your head, stretch as high as you can."
Harry had learned his lesson, he didn't question his master's orders, but
obeyed them at once, stretching on his tip toes, with his palms flat on the
dungeon wall. He rested his forehead on the wall, wondering what was going to
happen. A spell from Snape removed his robes, then Snape's hands were on him
again, fumbling with his belt and trouser fastenings and Harry moaned at the
thought that soon he would feel Snape's hands on him again. Trousers loosened,
Snape pulled down Harry's trousers and underwear in one fell swoop, leaving
them bunched around Harry's ankles and shoes.
Harry could hear similar noises behind him and he turned his head to try and
get a view of the man's cock, he hadn't seen it yet, but Snape forcefully put
his head back on the wall. "Don't look or I'll stop," Snape warned.
"Yes, sir," said Harry, hoping that he wouldn't be in trouble for just agreeing
to a command. Snape stepped closer to him again and Harry could feel the man's
cock against the cleft in his arse, already sticky with precome and he so
wanted to turn round and look, to see, to taste, but he knew he wasn't allowed
to yet. Snape made no move to penetrate him, but he rubbed up and down along
the cleft until Harry was practically climbing the walls. No-one had ever
touched him there before, he had no idea it would feel so good. Snape's hands
were on his waist, holding Harry where he wanted him. Harry didn't want to be
anywhere else but here.
"You will be on your knees," said Snape again. "And you will take all of me in
your mouth, even if it chokes you and you will," Snape's thrusts speeded up and
Harry's own cock was dragged across the rough dungeon stone and he didn't want
Snape to stop. Ever. "Swallow every mouthful! Ahh! Ahh!" Snape wailed as he
came, spurting hotly over Harry's naked skin. The wet heat was enough to send
Harry hurtling over the edge of his own orgasm and he spilled himself against
the stone, some dripping onto the floor and his clothes. Harry's knees buckled,
but Snape still had a firm grip in his waist and he didn't fall. "Oh, God,"
Harry moaned through the aftershocks. His legs felt like rubber and he wasn't
sure he could move anywhere at the moment.
Snape knelt down on the floor and pulled Harry onto his lap, hugging him close
and kissing him all over his face.
"All right, Harry?" he asked, concerned. Harry was sitting awkwardly in the
man's lap, his clothes around his ankles, his come on the wall, his clothes and
the floor, the air heavy with the scent of sex and he had never been better.
"Better than all right," he grinned, giving Snape a few kisses of his own.
"What brought that on? You don't normally do anything when we're in school."
"I know, I just wanted to stake a claim on you after I heard you were being
pursued. Oh," said Snape, glancing at Harry's neck. "I've bruised you, I hadn't
meant to be so rough."
"It's okay," said Harry. "I'm fine Severus, I would have used my word if I
wanted you to stop."
"I know, sometimes it scares me how out of control I get around you."
"Severus, you do know I'm not interested in David Parson, right? I didn't
encourage him." For that seemingly was what the punishment had been about,
hadn't it?
"I know, I just thought it was a good scenario, a reason for hurting you."
"You don't need a reason. Just do it when you feel like it."
"Harry - Harry, you don't want to be hurt all the time, do you? I don't think I
can handle that." Severus kissed his nose. "I don't want you to be with me just
because I hurt you. I hope, Harry. I hope there's more to this than that."
"I do too, Severus. I'm not with you because you hurt me, I'm with you because
you can see me. The real me, I mean. Most people can't see past the scar on my
forehead, but you've never subscribed to all that nonsense about the Boy Who
Lived. You were the only one who ever treated me as normal and punished me when
I deserved it, the other teachers let me get away with things just because of
who I am or because I was grieving, but you never did. If I acted up in your
class, I got detention or lines, it helped. You were treating me as if I was
real, a person, not a prophecy. Yes, sometimes I enjoy being hurt, but not all
the time. Just being held in your arms is good too. It's because it's you,
Severus, not because I'm being hurt. It was always you."
Severus hugged him tight and kissed his hair.
"So tell me, how did you discourage your suitor?" asked Severus and Harry's
tummy growled. "You'd better eat some lunch. You can tell me tonight, you're
not getting out of your punishment that easily." Severus cast a cleaning charm
over both of them and Harry's skin felt a little raw afterwards.
Harry stood up and put himself to rights, grinning at his lover as he donned
his robes, for that's what they were now, wasn't it?
"Don't worry, Severus. I'll be on my knees for you tonight."
 
Part Eleven
That night was the first time Harry had needed to use his word. He'd been on
the floor of their bedroom retreat, sucking on Severus' cock as though it was
the most delicious lollipop in the world and Severus lost himself in the
sensation of that hot wet heat engulfing him. He was in Harry's mouth and he
could almost come just from that thought alone.
He bit back a moan as Harry licked the sensitive vein on the underside. Harry
hadn't got him very far in his mouth at all, it was his first time doing it and
his technique could only improve with time and with practice. Oh, yes, he
intended to ensure Harry got lots of practice at this. He wanted to reach down
and pet Harry's head, when he remembered this was supposed to be a punishment,
not a reward and he growled down at the boy instead.
"You can do better than that. Take all of it in your mouth, boy," he ordered
and was shocked when Harry spluttered, choked and removed his mouth altogether
from his cock. "M- M-McGonagall," sobbed Harry, curling up in a ball by the
foot of the bed and wrapping his hands around his head as though to protect it
from blows.
Severus felt as if he'd just been doused in ice cold water, the shock was so
great and his erection faded almost at once. He didn't know what he'd done to
scare Harry, but there was no denying that's what was wrong with Harry now.
He knelt down and rubbed Harry's back. "Harry?" he asked softly, but Harry just
whimpered and pulled away from him, tucking himself against the bed. "Harry?
What did I do? Why did you need your word?"
Harry shook his head, unwilling or unable to tell him. Severus lay down and
wrapped his arms around the crying boy and rocked him. "Ssh, Harry. It's all
right. It's all right," he crooned over and over again until Harry fell asleep
on the floor.
Severus put him to bed, then lay down beside him and nestled Harry against his
chest. He hadn't meant to hurt Harry or scare him but if Harry didn't tell him
what the problem was, then he risked doing it again.
That was something he tried not to think of too much.
***
"Tea, Severus?" asked Dumbledore as he conjured a pot, two cups, sugar bowl and
a small jug of cream out of the air.
"No thank you, headmaster," replied Severus and Dumbledore banished the extra
cup with a wave of his wand. He fixed his own tea, lots of cream with four
sugars as Severus watched and winced. The man had a sweet tooth a mile long and
Severus could almost feel his own teeth ache at just the thought of all that
sugar.
"So, how is everything going?" asked Dumbledore as he sipped his tea.
Translation, what is happening with you and Harry and how near are you to
catching the culprit?
"Not too good, Albus," admitted Severus. "There is no trace of a magical
signature anywhere on the letters and I thought we might be looking for a
squib, but the magic used on the Quidditch stands could not have been performed
by a squib of any sort. No, we're definitely looking for someone magical. Some
of the owls used were from the school and some from the post office in
Hogsmeade. I've already spoken to the Post Mistress there, but she doesn't
remember everyone who's used their owls and no-one stood out as a stranger.
It's someone from within the school, Albus, I'm almost certain of that."
"Not Death Eaters?" The headmaster glanced briefly at Severus' left forearm.
"No, I don't think so. This isn't their style. Whoever this is, I'm not sure
they're trying to kill Harry outright. Oh, I think they have murder in mind
eventually, but they want to terrorise him first. Want to see him suffer as
much as possible beforehand."
"Torture?" gasped Dumbledore, setting his cup on the desk between them.
"Psychological torture. Letting Harry know that he's being watched, but that he
doesn't know who it could be, so he suspects everyone."
"Does he? Suspect everyone, I mean."
"No, but I think it's only a matter of time before he does." And before I lose
him, Severus thought sadly.
"So we are no nearer to a solution."
"No, Albus."
"Minerva has noticed Harry's absences from his bed, as have his friends,
Severus. I think it might be time for Harry to return there. He can't stay in
the retreat indefinitely."
"Why not, if it keeps him safe?" Severus had grown rather used to sharing a bed
with Harry these past few weeks, his own bed would seem lonely without him. "He
feels safe there, can you not let him have at least one place where he feels
safe?"
"How would it look if the governors were to discover that Harry spent his
nights with a professor?"
The words were said easily but Severus sensed their threat. Did Dumbledore
know? Did he know what had happened between himself and Harry? What was still
happening? He Occluded his mind at once, Dumbledore never waited for an invite
before making himself an unwelcome guest in someone else's mind. He couldn't
know, he was guessing, suspecting, that was all. At least Severus hoped it was.
"You were the one who suggested it," said Severus.
"Yes, yes, I did," he agreed, nodding. "But I'm afraid I may have been
mistaken. Very mistaken. The two of you spending so much time together can only
hinder our cause, Severus. You do remember what I requested of you?"
Dumbledore's eyes were no longer twinkling, but cold like two chips of blue
ice.
Requested, oh, Severus liked that. As if the headmaster had ever requested
anything. His words may have been couched in flattery and soft terms but they
both knew that the headmaster only ever gave orders and expected those orders
to be obeyed without question or Severus would no longer remain under the
protections at Hogwarts.
"I remember," the statement was the truth as far as it went. Severus did indeed
remember what Dumbledore had ordered him to do, but what the headmaster didn't
need to know was that Severus had long since stopped doing what the headmaster
had wanted. He was no longer following Dumbledore's agenda, but his own and
Harry's.
"And?"
"It is taking longer than I expected."
"You do know how important this is to the cause, don't you, Severus?"
"Of course, Albus, but I need more time."
"Very well," sighed the headmaster. "I will give both of you another week in
the retreat, but after that I'm afraid you know what has to be done."
Severus tried not to show any thoughts on his face. A week! Harry would never
be ready in a week, but by the looks on Dumbledore's face, he didn't
particularly care. He was quite willing to sacrifice Harry to the cause. What
the old coot hadn't reckoned on was that Severus wasn't.
***
Harry dreaded the arrival of the morning post owls now, always wondering if
there was going to be a letter that day from his stalker. Halloween morning was
no different, despite the decorations of pumpkins and live bats fluttering
around the ceiling in the Great Hall. The letters didn't arrive every day, nor
even every second day. There was no pattern, they arrived randomly and that
made it worse as he couldn't even prepare himself.
His heart fell to somewhere near his shoes when Hedwig swept towards him, a
large envelope in her beak. She slid gracefully to a halt beside his bowl of
cornflakes (uneaten, growing soggier by the minute) and dropped the envelope in
front of him. Harry recognised the untidy scrawl at once and bile rose in his
throat. This was too much, now they were using his own owl to send the messages
to him.
Hedwig lowered her head and hooted softly, wanting to be petted. Harry obliged,
wondering at the last person who had maybe touched his owl, stroked her as if
they were a friend, for that was the only way Hedwig would have delivered
letters from someone other than Harry.
Harry glanced up to find Snape staring steadily at him and looking pointedly at
the envelope.
"Harry? Aren't you going to open it?" asked Hermione as she sprinkled some
sugar on her porridge.
Harry didn't want to open it. "What's the point? It's just the same old thing
over and over again. I'm fed up reading the rubbish they send me."
"But there might be a clue," persisted Hermione, her hand hovering by it. "May
I?"
"Go ahead, but I don't think it'll help," said Harry, turning to Ron and for a
few moments they discussed the Quidditch ban and when they thought it might
start up again.
"Oh fuck!" exclaimed Hermione, loud enough for the whole Hall to hear. Ron and
Harry turned to her, surprised, Hermione didn't normally swear.
"Hermione what - ?" asked Harry and then he saw them, scattered on the table
like the tattered remnants of his life.
He felt as if he wanted to puke, to cry, to faint, or maybe all three. His
lungs were bursting with pain as he tried to breathe through the terror that
had crushed his chest. There were photos, hundreds of them. All of him. Harry
asleep in his bed at Gryffindor Tower, playing Quidditch, in lessons. Photos of
the tasks at the Tri-Wizard tournament, flying on Buckbeak. Photos of his first
ever Quidditch lesson with Oliver Wood when he first started school.
When he was eleven.
Harry stood up, swaying as he took in the images, blurring into a collage of
his life at Hogwarts. He felt sick and shaky and just knew he was going to
throw up there on the floor, there was now way of stopping it now. He sank to
his knees and retched, bringing up what little breakfast he had, trying to
avoid staining anyone's shoes, but he felt so awful by that point that he
didn't really care if he did or not.
A few moments later, Ron and Hermione were beside him, Hermione rubbing his
back as he three up twice more and Ron vanished the vomit as soon as it
appeared. Ron handed him some minty sweets from his pocket and Harry took them
gratefully. His mouth felt as if Hedwig had been using it for a nest.
"Sorry," Harry mumbled, although what for he wasn't sure. He knew the whole
school was staring at him, at the display he'd made of himself and he just
wanted to run and hide somewhere. Somewhere with Snape.
"Are you all right, Harry?" asked Hermione, making no effort to remove her hand
from his back.
"I think I'll go and have a lie down," he said, pushing himself to his feet,
Ron and Hermione following. Ron stuffed the photos back in the envelope,
grimacing as he did so.
"Aren't you coming with us to Hogsmeade?" she asked. "The fresh air will do you
good."
"Do you want me to? I thought the two of you might, you know, want to be
alone."
"Harry, of course we want you to!" exclaimed Ron with such enthusiasm that
Harry suspected it was a lie.
"I don't want to be in the way," Harry protested.
"You won't be in the way. It'll help take your mind off things, won't it?"
continued Ron.
"If you're sure?"
They both nodded frantically.
"Mr. Potter, a word please," said Snape as he arrived where they stood by the
table. "Bring that with you," he pointed to the envelope.
"I'll meet you in half an hour or so," Harry said to his friends as he followed
Snape out.
Snape led them to an empty classroom where he locked and warded the door and
then wrapped his arms around Harry in a comforting hug. "Are you okay, Harry?"
he asked gently as he stroked Harry's back.
"No, not really," he admitted. "I'm really scared, Severus. It wasn't a letter
this time. It was photos."
"Photos?"
"Yes, photos of me. There were even photos of me when I'm asleep in my dorm.
And - and, Severus - " Harry paused, he had no idea how to tell Severus the
next part, unsure of the man's reaction.
"Go on, Harry, I'm not going to bite. Not unless you want me to," Severus
glanced down at him with a grin. Harry returned it, feeling a lot better now
that he was wrapped in his lover's arms.
"Some of them aren't recent. They go as far back as when I was eleven."
"Eleven?" gasped Snape. "You mean this has been going on for years? This
stalking? But why have they only attempted to contact you now?"
"Because they know about us," said Harry. "You've read the letters. They called
me Snape's little whore. in a few of them."
"They also called you Voldemort's, Hagrid's and the headmaster's if I'm not
mistaken," replied Snape.
"Yes, but I think that was just to throw us off track. I think we might be able
to find out who sent them."
"How, Harry? I've cast every reveal spell I know. They've hidden their magic
too well."
"Yes, but what about fingerprints? Muggles use them to catch criminals
sometimes, perhaps Mr. Weasley would know someone who could help?"
"Harry you're a genius! If they're pure blood, they might not have even
considered that and not taken any care with removing them. This is worth a try,
Harry. I'll get onto Arthur right away and get the ball rolling." Severus bent
down and kissed Harry fiercely, as if he was drowning and Harry was air.
"I promise you, Harry, I won't let the sick fuck get away with hurting you."
Harry didn't doubt it for a second.
 
Part Twelve
It started to rain as the trio made their way to Hogsmeade so that by the time
they arrived, the bottoms of their cloaks were soaked and mud splattered and
their steps were little more than squelches in the mud covered ground. Ron and
Hermione were a little way ahead of Harry, holding hands, their heads close
together and giggling in that secret way between lovers. Harry's chest hurt at
the sight. Severus had never held his hand like that, he never would while
Harry was still a student. They'd never be able to be open about their
relationship until Harry left school. They had to hide, as if it was something
shameful and sordid.
To some people it might be, a teacher involved with a student, but Harry had
never felt ashamed at anything he'd done with Severus. What upset him, what had
him shivering in revulsion was the knowledge that someone was watching him,
photographing him without his knowledge or consent. Watching him sleep was the
worst. How close were they to him to take those photographs? Had they been
close enough to touch him? Had they touched him while he slept? Without him
knowing? The thoughts brought bile to his throat and he swallowed quickly,
trying to dispel it before he threw up again. He didn't want to break down
right here in the middle of Hogsmeade. Harry rested his hands on his thighs as
he took a few deep breaths.
Ron and Hermione turned round when they realised Harry wasn't keeping up with
them. "Where do you want to go, Harry?" asked Hermione as she wandered back to
him and linked her arm through his. Harry tried to ignore the look on Ron's
face as she did so. Great, not this again. When was Ron going to realise that
Harry had no interest in Hermione as a girlfriend whatsoever? He didn't need
Ron's unfounded jealousy on top of everything else.
"Oh, anywhere's fine," replied Harry. What he really wanted to do was go back
to the castle. He felt too exposed out here in the village, wondering if
everyone he saw was the phantom photographer.
"How about Zonko's?" Ron suggested. Harry agreed eagerly and disentangled
himself from Hermione's arm, before running the few steps to catch up with Ron.
"Hey, Ron, there's no need to be jealous, I can hold your arm too if you want
me to," grinned Harry and he made as if to reach for Ron's hand. Ron soon
stuffed both hands in his pockets.
"Er, no, Harry. That's okay. I don't know why I got jealous, you're not
interested in Hermione like that, are you? You're both just friends, right?"
"Definitely," said Harry, who'd noticed that Hermione was walking a few paces
behind them but not making any move to catch up. It seemed she was leaving the
two of them alone to hash this out once and for all. "Look, Ron. I don't know
if anyone's told you this," (anyone being a short, bushy haired girl walking
behind them), "But I'm gay, so I won't be interested in Hermione as anything
more than a friend."
Ron stopped so abruptly in the middle of the road that other wizards and
witches had to swerve to avoid bumping into him. Hermione stopped a few paces
behind them.
"You're gay? But what about Cho? I thought you liked her?"
"So did I at the time, I think I was just feeling confused. It would never have
worked out between us. We were too similar."
"Too similar?" queried Ron.
"Yeah, we both liked boys!" Harry chuckled and was relieved when his friend
burst out laughing too. It had been such a long time since Harry had laughed
with his friends, such a long time since he felt like laughing.
Hermione chose that moment to catch up with them, wrapping her arms around both
of them. "Well, are we going to Zonko's or not?" she asked.
They made their way to the shop, Ron and Hermione holding hands again but every
time Harry would try and hang back, Hermione would look back, glare at him and
point to the ground beside her, so they were all on the same level eventually.
The joke shop was crowded with students eagerly crushing in to see what the
newest lines in Weasleys' Wizarding Wheezes were. Fred and George now had an
arrangement with Mr. Zonko, where if he stocked their products, they would
stock his in their shop in Diagon Alley. Since Mr. Zonko could never have
afforded his own premises in Diagon Alley, he was quite happy with the
arrangement. Of course, Harry knew all of this second hand from Ron's letters
from the twins and he was really pleased that their joke shop idea was working
out. The best galleons he ever spent giving it to them.
"It's a bit crowded," said Ron. "Do you want to go to Madam Puddifoot's?"
Although Ron's gaze took in both of them, Harry knew that the question was
really for Hermione. He was in the way, Harry had known it all along and he
felt a pang in his chest that his friends couldn't even be honest enough with
him to let him know when they wanted to spend some alone time together.
"You two go," said Harry, who had no desire to enter the Tea Shop of Doom
himself. Doom if you weren't part of a happy couple anyway. He hadn't been back
there since Cho. "I'll head back to school."
"Harry, you can't go back by yourself!" Hermione protested shrilly, causing all
the other customers to turn and stare at them.
"Don't be silly, Hermione. It's barely half a mile to Hogwarts," huffed Ron.
"What would happen in Hogsmeade?"
"Ron's right, Hermione. I'll be fine. I've got my wand and I'm not going far."
"I don't know..." Hermione was still having her doubts.
"Go to Madam Puddifoot's with Ron," urged Harry, heading towards the shop door.
"I'll see you both later."
Without another word Harry pushed past the throng of students and out into the
air, making his way to the wooded lane that led back to Hogwarts. The rain had
stopped but the lane was churned mud, difficult to walk on. Cart tracks and
footprints were filled with puddles of murky brown water. Because of the mud it
was a while before Harry noticed the sound of squelchy footsteps behind him. He
whirled, his wand out ready to cast a hex when he saw David Parson quite a way
behind him.
A loud yowling in the distance startled both of them. "Did you hear that?"
asked Harry, whirling round to face the trees.
"Yeah, what do you think it is?"
"Sounds like a cat," said Harry edging closer to the tree line. "Were you
following me?" Harry asked the Ravenclaw as he turned back round
"Um, yeah?" he sounded embarrassed more than anything. "Look, I know you're
going out with someone, but the whole school's been talking about you being
stalked and I didn't want you to go back to school by yourself. Just in case
anything happened."
Harry was so surprised he almost dropped his wand. "You mean you wanted to
protect me? Even though I didn't go out with you?"
"Well, yeah. You're a good person, Harry. I wouldn't want anything to happen to
you."
The yowling started up again. "It sounds like it's in pain," said Harry as he
stepped further into the trees. "Do you want to help me look?"
"Sure," said David and they both entered the woods. "Harry is that - " the
other boy's words were cut off with a loud thump. Harry turned round and came
face to face with his stalker.
"You!" he gasped, before his wand was yanked from his hand and Harry was
pressed face first on the muddy ground, choking on it as his mouth and nose
were pushed in again and again.
 
"Yes me! I bet you never thought of that, did you, Potter?"
Harry struggled trying to get out of the man's grip. "Scared Potter? I know you
like the rough stuff," he hissed in Harry's ear. "Do you think I didn't know?
How you get on your knees for him? How you're Snape's whore? After I'm through
with you, he won't want you. No-one will!"
A rock against his head, the words dimmed as Harry slowly lost consciousness.
***
Arthur Weasley's office was barely bigger than a broom cupboard, but the man
himself could not be more welcoming, ushering Severus in and offering him a
shot of the finest firewhiskey he had on offer. It was not as expensive as what
Severus was used to, but he accepted it in the spirit it was offered and downed
a sip before he got down to business.
"Fingerprints, eh?" mused Arthur. "I know someone over at Scotland Yard, a
detective. His son's at Hogwarts, he might be able to help us. Tristian Finch-
Fetchley, Justin, his son is in Harry and Ron's year. Do you have all the
letters with you?"
Severus cast a spell and all of the letters dropped onto Arthur's desk. Arthur
rummaged in a drawer, pulling out some clear flexible content holders. "What
are those, Arthur?" he asked curiously.
"Muggle invention, plastic bags. Handy for carrying things and stopping any
more fingerprints getting on these. The Muggles don't like it when there are
two many fingerprints on items, makes it harder to identify the culprit."
Severus groaned inwardly. How many people had touched the letters? Harry, his
friends, the headmaster, the post mistress, himself. They were lucky if half
the school hadn't had their paws all over them. "So they won't be able to
help?"
"Maybe not with fingerprints, but you see that large envelope there?"
Severus glanced down and saw that it was the envelopes which had contained the
photographs. "What about it?"
"It's a Muggle envelope, see there's no wax seal?" Arthur eagerly pointed it
out like a child left to run riot through Honeyduke's sweet shop.
"So?" Severus was getting a little impatient and it came out a tad sharp.
"They have special flaps to seal envelopes, some are self sticking, but this is
one of the more old fashioned ones. Whoever put those photos in the envelope,
had to lick the flap to get it to stick. There's your culprit, the one who
licked the envelope. I'll Apparate over to Scotland Yard now, would you like to
come?"
"No thank you, Arthur. I must get back to Hogwarts, but you will let me know
the results of these Muggle tests as soon as you can?"
"Of course, Severus. Molly's been that worried about the boy ever since she
heard."
"We all are," sighed Severus as he took his leave and Apparated from the
Ministry to the edge of the Hogwarts wards. Not even four in the afternoon and
already it was growing steadily darker. The students would be returning from
Hogsmeade soon, ready for the Halloween Feast. He would see Harry soon. The
thought buoyed his steps as he made his way back to the castle. He wondered if
Harry had enjoyed his visit, it had been a while since he'd seen him in the
company of his friends and Severus hoped that it wasn't because of him that
Harry was spending less time with them. Yes, he enjoyed spending time in
Harry's company as he hoped the boy enjoyed his, but he needed his friends too.
Harry shouldn't just rely on one person. Especially when that person could let
you down at any moment. His eyes flicked quickly to his arm and away again.
Severus grimaced as he entered the Great Hall, filled with chattering students.
Automatically his eyes wandered over to the Gryffindor table. He spotted
Weasley and Granger, but no Harry. Heart thudding in his chest he rounded on
them at once.
"Where is Harry Potter? Why isn't he with you?"
"He came back early, Professor," replied Granger, visibly quaking under his
anger. "We thought he'd gone for a lie down. Oh, Ron, didn't you check the
dorms?"
Weasley shook his head, paling so much that his freckles stood out starkly
against the skin.
"You let him come back alone?!!" screeched Severus, having to force himself not
to go for his wand and hex both of them for their stupidity. Whoever was
stalking Harry had been watching him and if they were watching then they knew
when Harry was alone and could strike.
Just then, the double doors of the Hall swung open and in staggered David
Parson, carrying a blood soaked, unconscious Harry in his arms. There were
shrieks and cries of alarm from all tables as Madam Pomfrey rushed from the
dais and reached the two students.
"What happened?" she demanded of David. "What happened?"
But it was too late, David slumped to the floor in a dead faint, Severus'
quickly cast levitation spell the only thing which prevented the two boys from
landing in a crumpled heap on the floor.
"Severus, quickly! Help me get them to the infirmary."
Severus obeyed at once, steering them out the door and down to the hospital
wing.
As if he would have gone anywhere else with Harry in that state.
Part Thirteen
Extra warning for this part: Mutilation
Severus placed Harry and David on two beds next to each other while Poppy cast
a general scanning spell over both of them. She told Severus to just keep an
eye on David while she examined Harry. "David's just fainted, he should come
round in a moment."
"And Harry?" Severus demanded, for it was Harry he was more concerned about.
But Poppy refused to answer him and pulled the curtain round Harry's bed with a
swish. A few moments later he could not hear even the slightest thing from
within the curtained off area and knew that she had cast a silencing charm.
Merlin, what was wrong with Harry? What had happened?
Argus Filch entered the infirmary, his awful cat twining round his legs as he
wheeled a bucket and mop in front of him, grumbling to himself all the while as
he mopped the floor. "Getting mud all over my floors," and other more colourful
versions of the same. The ugly cat was making pitter patter noises all over the
infirmary floor and its paws were leaving muddy tracks. He took a closer look
at Filch, that's when Severus saw it. Filch's clothes had always been in a bit
of a state so it had taken a few moments to realise that the darker patches on
his outfit were in fact mud splatters. He looked as if he'd been rolling around
in it.
Severus leaned over David's bed, pretending to whisper something to the boy and
Filch edged closer to the bed as though to eavesdrop. In no time at all,
Severus cast a binding spell on the man and Petrificus Totalus on the cat as
well, its hissing cut off mid flow. Both were lying on the floor, powerless to
do anything until Severus released the spells.
Filch glared at him. "What do you think you're doing, professor?" he spat the
word professor like an insult and Severus wondered why he'd never realised it
before. Filch was a squib, a jealous squib who hated all those who could do
magic when he couldn't. Who better than to take his inadequacies out on than
one of the world's most powerful wizards, Harry Potter?
As a member of staff, Argus Filch had access to every part of the castle,
including the boy's dormitory. But what about the Quidditch stands? That had
needed magic and Filch was most definitely a squib. "Professor Snape," came a
weary voice from the bed. David Parson had woken up.
"Yes?" Severus snapped his head round, while glancing back to keep an eye on
Filch and Mrs. Norris.
"Harry sir? Is he all right?"
"I don't know, Madam Pomfrey is in with him now. What happened, David?"
"We heard a noise, a cat I think and we both went into the woods to search for
it. Harry thought it was in pain or something and he wanted to help. When we
got to the woods, someone knocked me out and when I woke up, Harry was lying
unconscious on the ground and covered in blood."
"So you didn't see who did it?"
"No, sir, but before I was knocked out, I saw the cat. It was Mrs. Norris."
"Are you sure about that?" demanded Severus.
"Yes, sir. I'm positive, every student would know that cat." David looked over
at the stiff form of the feline and shuddered.
"Thank you, David," said Severus, stalking over to the hospital fireplace and
fire-calling the headmaster. He was deep in conversation with Professor
McGonagall. It couldn't have worked out better, for he would need Minerva too.
"Albus, Minerva, can you please come to the infirmary at once and send word to
the Aurors? I think we may have found our culprit."
Minerva's hand flew to her mouth, but not before a small choked gasp escaped
it. "Who is it, Severus?" she asked at last.
"Come and see," he replied, stepping away from the fireplace so that both of
them could step through the Floo to the infirmary. On seeing Argus Filch and
his cat lying unmoving on the floor. "What? That's impossible! Mr. Filch is a
Squib!" protested Minerva. The headmaster had yet to speak.
"He may be a squib," agreed Severus. "But I believe his cat is something else
entirely. Minerva, if you'd be so kind?"
As the Transfigurations professor, Minerva was well placed to reverse any sort
of Transfiguration, human or not. Her wand shook as she pointed it at the still
form of the cat. A small flash of red light and they watched transfixed as Mrs.
Norris slowly transformed from ugly cat to even uglier human. It was woman of
late middle age, long brown hair streaked with grey and Severus guessed if she
could have formed an expression, it would have been one of loathing. Under
Severus' spell her face looked calm and blank but he would bet a year's salary
that she was feeling anything but.
The line of her face seemed slightly familiar, but Severus couldn't place her.
"Albus? Minerva? Do you know her?"
"It's Lydia Rookwood, Agustus Rookwood's sister," said Minerva, her face as
white as chalk. "She's a metamorphmagus. I taught her over twenty years ago. I
taught her!" Minerva grabbed hold of a bed to steady herself, as if she
couldn't quite believe this was happening.
Rookwood, ah, one of Voldemort's other spies, no wonder her face seemed a
little familiar. Severus had only seen Rookwood a handful of times. The woman's
arm was unmarked, but Severus knew that not all those sympathetic to Voldemort
were marked. Was there more to this than just Filch's psychotic jealousy?
"Why, Argus?" asked Dumbledore, shaking his head and looking sadly at the man,
but Filch refused to speak.
The Aurors arrived shortly afterwards, five of them altogether, but Poppy still
hadn't emerged from examining Harry. It had almost been an hour. What was wrong
with Harry? Severus had never doubted the medi-witch's abilities but he worried
now, surely it wouldn't take that long to rouse him?
The Aurors lifted Filch up and tied him to one of the visitor chairs, doing the
same to the woman before asking Snape to remove the spells. Moody held up a
parchment and waved it under Filch's nose. "Do you know what this is?" he
sneered at his captive. "This is proof that you were the one who was
terrorising Harry Potter all this time! Smith, where's that Veritaserum?" Moody
turned to the nearest Auror, a youth of no more than nineteen or twenty, he
blushed and stammered.
"Um, sir, I forgot it!"
"You forgot?" Moody rolled both eyes, magical and normal. "Severus, I don's
suppose you have any to hand?"
"You're in luck, Alastor, I just finished a batch yesterday." Severus hurried
off to retrieve it. He felt a lot better that they would be using his own
concoction rather than what the Aurors were usually issued with.
Once back in the infirmary, he dosed Filch and the woman with four drops each,
he didn't want them fighting it. Their eyes glazed over and drool collected at
the corners of their mouths.
"Now, Filch," growled Moody. "Let's start at the beginning shall we? Did you
take those photographs of Harry Potter without his consent?"
"Some of them, she took the rest. She could hide in any form so he never
noticed, but I was the one who wanted the photographs. She only took them
because I asked her to."
"Why did you want the photos?"
"To look at him, happy and smiling. He never looked at me except with disgust.
He never smiled at me, none of the filth did. They thought I was dirt, messing
up the school and expecting me to clean up after them all the time. Animals,
all of them. Worse than animals. He was the worst, always getting away with
being out of bounds, the headmaster refusing to punish him when I reported his
infractions. But I could punish him. I did. I punished him." He cackled with
demented glee and Severus wanted to smash the man's head in it for what he'd
done to Harry.
Moody turned to Lydia Rookwood. "Did you cast the spell on the Quidditch stands
so that Harry Potter would fall?"
"Yes."
"Why?"
"I wanted to kill him. Argus was spending too much time stalking the boy and
not enough time with me. I thought it had gone on long enough. With the boy
gone, he would be back to normal. But once it failed, he got even more and
obsessed, wanting him watched all the time and of course it was me who had to
do it. Pretending to be insects and spiders so that he wouldn't notice me. I
shrunk my cameras and took all the photos Argus wanted, but it still wasn't
enough."
"I wanted to hurt him," Filch interjected. "I didn't want to kill him, no. I
wanted him hurt, so hurt that he would always remember that it was me who done
it. Harry Potter, beaten and humiliated by a squib!" Filch spat, his saliva
landing with a wet pop on the floor. Moody slapped him hard across the face,
the other Aurors didn't bother to intervene.
"Lydia Rookwood, you are under arrest for the attempted murder of Harry Potter
and for being an illegal metamorphmagus. Trial is set for three weeks. Take her
away," Moody told two of the Aurors as he pointed at the shaking woman.
"Not Azkaban! You can't send me there!" she protested, but her pleas fell on
deaf ears as the Aurors conjured manacles and ankle chains, all of them imbued
with magic inhibitors, as Severus knew from the brief time he'd worn them.
Lydia was still screaming as the Aurors led her out of the castle and away from
the wards.
"What did you do to Harry today?" asked Severus, but the Veritaserum had worn
off and Filch just smirked smugly at Severus and the remaining spectators. He
couldn't give him another dose, it would only knock him unconscious and they
still wouldn't be able to find out anything.
None of them had heard Madam Pomfrey, she was well used to walking softly in
the infirmary so as not to disturb her patients. All the watchers knew, was
that Filch's eyes widened in shock, they turned to see what had so surprised
him and it happened so quickly that no-one could stop the witch as she flew at
him, scratching and clawing at the bound man's face, her nails drawing blood.
"You bastard! You fucking bastard!" she screamed as he scratched and punched
him again and again. The man's face was crimson with blood in a matter of
moments.
"Get her off me! Get her off me!" shrieked Filch, but not one of them came to
his aid, quite willing to let the matron have a go at him. Something they would
all probably like to do themselves, but why when she was so good at it?
"This is assault! This is!" shrieked Filch.
"Assault? I'll show you assault!" The spell was cast, one that only one of the
spectators had ever heard of before, but by the end of it Filch was screaming
in agony, unable to form a coherent sentence. And there, on the floor were what
were unmistakably the man's cock and balls. Two of the Aurors threw up at the
sight, but not Moody nor Severus. Minerva still looked a bit pale, but she kept
herself together.
"He'll bleed to death if that's not taken care of soon," said Moody, for all
the world as if they were all just having a chat over a cup of tea.
"Yes," agreed Dumbledore. "Poppy, I think you'd better help him. We don't want
our medi-witch sent to Azkaban for murder, no matter how justified it might
be."
Poppy's mouth set in a grim line as she cast another spell, attached the man's
genitals back on his body and stopped the bleeding. Once finished, she grabbed
the man's balls and gave them a sharp yank. He yelped and she grinned
maliciously.
"Just checking to see that everything's attached."
The Aurors took Filch away, making sure that he banged into the door on the way
out. "Severus, I must go and write a report for the school governors, can you
and Minerva stay with Harry for a while?" asked Dumbledore.
"We won't be anywhere else, Albus," Minerva informed him as Severus nodded.
There was no way he was leaving Harry alone. Not now. Not ever.
"Poppy? Why did you attack Filch like that? What did he do?" asked Minerva.
"What? Besides the broken bones and concussion? He was vicious, Harry's leg was
broken in three places, as though he was stamped on. There were boot marks all
over his body, broken rips, ruptured spleen, damaged kidneys. The blood loss
was extensive, I dread to think what would have happened if he hadn't got back
in time. Filch - that vile man - he - mutilated the boy," Poppy added in a
whisper, glancing over where David was listening eagerly. Severus cast a
silencing charm around them and urged the medi-witch to continue.
"Go on," urged Minerva too.
"He - he's, oh Merlin, how do I say this? Harry's now a eunuch. Filch castrated
him."
 
Part Fourteen
Severus was surprised at Minerva's stoicism when Poppy gave them the grim news.
He thought for sure she might have fainted, but despite seeming even paler, she
gave no indication that she was going to do something so girlish as that. It
was Severus who felt the world spinning around him, white spots danced in front
of his eyes and it took an effort of will just to keep himself conscious. He'd
had plenty of practice during his previous tortures after all.
"It couldn't have been that spell," muttered Snape. "Unless Lydia Rookwood cast
it?" It had been well known at one time among the Death Eaters, a Dark spell
but not Unforgivable and Severus was surprised the medi-witch knew of it, never
mind could cast it. The Death Eaters used it as a form of torture when they
were bored with the Cruciatus, kept especially for those they suspected were
spies. It was a risk Severus took every time he was summoned and if it happened
to him he knew there would be no medi-witch available to heal him and he would
bleed to death very slowly and painfully.
"It wasn't a spell," Poppy shook her head. "He used a knife, that's why there
was so much blood loss. If David hadn't got him back here when he did... The
only consolation is that I think Harry was unconscious when it happened. I
can't even begin to imagine how painful it would be."
"Did he - did he remove everything?" Severus managed to gasp out, feeling his
own sac draw up and tighten, getting as close to his body as possible. He just
couldn't imagine his bits not being there and he shuddered, a phantom shiver of
Harry's pain. Azkaban was too good for the likes of Argus Filch.
"I really shouldn't be discussing this with either of you," said Poppy, seeming
to snap out of a daze. "It's up to Harry who he tells, if he wishes to. Please
do not discuss this with anyone else. I shouldn't have spoken."
"It's quite all right, Poppy. We won't tell anyone, will we, Severus?" she gave
him a glare that rivalled one of his own.
"No, of course not." He would never betray Harry's trust like that. Never. "Can
we sit with him for a while?"
"Yes, Severus. He's still unconscious, but he should wake soon. There's a
bottle of pain killing potion on his bedside cabinet, if he wakes before I'm
there, make sure he drinks all of it. He'll be in excruciating pain as soon as
he wakes up."
Her instructions finished, Poppy smoothed down her apron and bustled off to her
office. Minerva accio'ed another chair over for Severus to sit on. Minerva
leant over and gave Harry's forehead a soft peck before she took her seat and
Severus felt pained at that. Severus wished he could give Harry a kiss of
comfort, or even hold his hand, but he could do neither of those things.
Instead he sat down and they both stared in silence at Harry's prone form.
His head was padded with bandages and the tendrils of hair which had escaped
were dark, matted with blood and mud. Harry was as still and pale as a marble
statue, the slight rise and fall of his chest the only indication that he was
still in the land of the living. Bruises covered his face and arms, his nose
looked as if it might have been broken, but Madam Pomfrey had already fixed
that. The hospital gown covered his torso, but Severus guessed bruises would
decorate his back and chest too. Severus could see the outline of the medallion
that should have taken him to safety, but obviously Harry couldn't get to his
jewel in time or this would never have happened. Severus would never forgive
himself for being in London at the time.
The attack had been vicious, hateful, done out of pure spite because Filch was
jealous of everything Harry had. His magic, his friends, a happy life. That's
where Filch was wrong, for Severus had had his suspicions for a while now that
Harry's life had been far from happy, but the boy had hidden it well. He
wondered if anyone knew or suspected. Had the headmaster sent him back to
Privet Drive again and again, knowing what Harry suffered there?
Now this, it was too much and Severus wanted to scream, to claw, to kick, to
kill. Harry didn't deserve this. Filch would pay. Oh yes, he would pay for
this. Severus could guarantee that.
"You're very quiet, Severus," said Minerva, reaching out to caress Harry's
unresponsive hand. Severus wanted to knock the woman's hand away and claim
Harry for his own, right there and then without thinking of the consequences.
Neither he nor Harry would survive if Voldemort ever found out about them.
"I was just thinking."
"What about?"
"That Azkaban is too good for the likes of Filch. Maybe Poppy should have let
him bleed to death after all."
Minerva didn't answer for a while. "Hmm, maybe. Do you think there's any way
they can keep this out of the paper? I'm sure Harry won't want everyone knowing
what happened to him."
"They'll have to report the attack, but not what form the attack took. Unless
Filch and Rookwood reveal it at the trial, no-one else will have to know."
"Maybe not yet, but Harry will have to tell eventually. His girlfriend or
future wife, he'll not be able to have children."
"Excuse me, Minerva, I just want to go and talk to Poppy for a while." He
couldn't bear discussing Harry with Minerva like this, it felt too much like
talking about him behind his back. Poppy was different, she was a medical
professional and her discussing Harry's condition didn't feel like gossiping
about him.
Poppy was writing up some notes, he could see her through the open office door.
"Come in, Severus," she invited, warding the door as soon as he had entered the
room. "I presume you wanted to talk about Harry?"
"Yes, Poppy. I wondered if there was any way you could reverse it? Like you did
with Filch?"
"No, Severus, I'm sorry. That was a simple reversal of a spell I had just cast.
There was no spell and since we don't have Harry's organs, there is no way of
re-attaching anything."
"Organs?" Severus could feel his legs shake, he sank into the chair in front of
Poppy's desk and hung his head in his hands.
"Filch removed Harry's scrotum and testicles, Severus. His penis is still
intact, but Harry will need to become adjusted to his new body."
"Will he change further? His body, I mean."
"No, as the castration happened after puberty, he will remain what he always
was, a young man. His body will no longer produce testosterone or semen, he
might still be able to ejaculate, but there will be no sperm. He won't ever
father children. His sex drive will be much lower than a normal male and he
might find his physical strength decreasing, as well as his emotions becoming
calmer. His body hair might decrease or become finer, but he won't suddenly
become a girl. He's also at increased risk of osteoporosis because of the lack
of male hormones now. I'd like to see him increase his calcium intake along
with the rest of the nutrients his body needs. Every term, he comes back here
malnourished."
"Muggles used to do this, didn't they? Deliberately, to guard their women?"
Severus was sure he had read that somewhere.
"I believe so, Severus. They mistakenly believed that eunuchs did not or could
get erections. They can, it's just not as easy for them, it takes longer."
"They do get erections?"
"Some do, it varies from person to person, as does everything. I don't know
what the case will be with Harry, but he may even be able to have dry orgasms
and maybe even a few wet ones, but his fluid will have no sperm in it. Eunuchs
have been known to feel pleasure if the prostate is stimulated."
Severus flushed but she continued as if they were discussing the weather. "He's
still the same person you fell in love with, Severus," she said softly.
"I have no idea what you mean."
"Severus, just because I spend most of my time in the infirmary does not mean
that I am blind or stupid. I see a lot more than people give me credit for. I
know who comes to visit my patients and Harry Potter has had more visits from
you than his friends and the headmaster combined. Why else do you think I'm
telling you this? Do you think I would discuss Harry's condition with just
anyone?"
Severus shook his head, there was no point in denying it anymore. "What are we
going to do?" he whispered.
"You're going to keep it a secret like you have been doing," she said briskly.
"I won't tell, Severus. I promise. Harry will need you more than ever now.
He'll feel shocked and scared, frightened that you might reject him because
he's different now. He's been mutilated, something taken from him without his
consent, it's almost like a rape, Severus and Harry will be feeling like that
for quite some time. He needs you, don't turn away from him now."
"I won't," said Severus, his nails digging so hard into the palms of his hands
that he drew blood. A scream from Minerva had them both rushing out to the main
ward and running to Harry's bed. Harry's empty bed.
"Minerva what happened?" asked Poppy breathlessly.
"Harry woke up screaming, then he pressed his chest and just disappeared."
"It's okay, Minerva. I know where he's gone," said Severus, feeling the
medallion on his own chest heat up. He picked up the bottle of painkilling
potion and pressed the jewel, leaving a bewildered Poppy and Minerva in his
wake as he was transported out of the infirmary and to the safe room.
Harry was curled up in the corner, leaning sideways against the wall, his hand
clutching his groin and screaming in agony. The front of his gown was stained
crimson and Severus just hoped it was old blood and that he hadn't opened up
the wounds again.
Severus ran to him and turned Harry's face to him, opening his mouth. "Harry,
drink this, you'll feel better in a moment."
He tipped the potion down Harry's throat, making sure that Harry drank every
drop, despite his spluttering and choking, his hitching screams and sobs.
Severus' heart ached for Harry, for the young man he loved with every fibre of
his being and he knew that there was no way now he could ever carry out
Dumbledore's plan. Harry had been through enough and it ended here. Right now.
No more games. No more lies. Harry had to be told everything. Tonight.
The bottle now empty, Severus set it down and wrapped Harry in his arms. "S-
Severus," he sobbed. "It hurts! Oh, God, it hurts!" Harry's hands tried to get
to his groin again, but Severus moved his arms from Harry's back and grabbed
hold of Harry's hands, not wanting Harry to undo Poppy's work.
"I know, Harry, I know. It'll stop soon," he said softly, as he caressed
Harry's hand, trying to distract him from the pain until the potion took
effect. It wouldn't be long now, it was one of his more potent brews and soon
Harry's breathing eased out and he was no longer sobbing or screaming.
"What do you remember, Harry?"
"Filch, oh, God, it was Filch! He was the one who was stalking me," Harry said,
looking into Severus' eyes. "He knocked David out and then tackled me to the
ground, I didn't have time to press the jewel to get to the safe room before he
knocked me out too. The next thing I remember is waking up in the infirmary.
What did he do to me? I don't know what he did," Harry turned from Severus and
threw up over the floor, his shoulders heaving with the effort of his retching.
Severus banished the mess and took Harry in his arms again.
Harry was shaking, he felt hot, but was shivering too. "Harry, we have to get
you back to see Poppy."
Harry plucked at the hem of the hospital gown, staring wide eyed at the spots
of blood on the front. He looked up at Severus in alarm. "Did he - did he rape
me?" Harry asked at last. "I don't remember, Severus. I don't remember what he
did."
"Harry, no, not that." Merlin, how was he supposed to tell the boy this?
"Why do I hurt down there?" he asked, waving a hand at his groin.
"Harry - do you know what a eunuch is?"
Harry paled, struggling to get out of Severus’ grasp. He stood up, unsteady on
his feet and walked the length of the room, to get as far away from Severus as
possible. "No. No. No," Harry mumbled over and over again as if by saying it
out loud, it would be true. He leaned against the far wall, slapping his palms
against the stone and repeated his mantra.
"Harry, I'm sorry," said Severus, standing up and walking towards him.
"Stay away from me!" screamed Harry. "Stay away!"
But Severus didn't think that's what Harry needed right now. As soon as he was
a few paces away from Harry, Harry detached himself from the wall and flung
himself at Severus, pummelling Severus' chest with his fists. "It's your
fault!" sobbed Harry. "It's your fault! You were supposed to protect me! You
were supposed to be protect me!"
Harry kept hitting his chest and Severus continued to let him, accepting every
deserved punch. It was his fault, he was not going to deny it and if it made
Harry feel any better to beat Severus to a pulp, then Severus was going to just
go ahead and let him.
***
It was another two hours before Harry had calmed down enough to curl up again
in Severus' arms. "I'm sorry, Severus."
"Don't be, Harry. You're right, it was my fault. I should have been there, I
should have stopped him."
"No, it was Filch's fault. He was the one who did this to me," Harry burrowed
his face in Severus' robes as if he never wanted to leave them.
"We should get you back to the infirmary, that potion will be wearing off
soon."
Harry looked up, blinking wearily, probably unable to see much without his
glasses. "Severus? Can you - will you stay with me in the infirmary? I don't
want to be on my own."
"Of course I will, Harry. I'm not leaving you. Ever."
 
Part Fifteen
He knew he'd promised not to leave Harry, but Poppy had dosed the boy with
Dreamless Sleep and he should not wake for while yet. Ample time for him to get
to Azkaban and back.
The grounds of Azkaban prison were filled with plenty of rats, but Severus
would only need one.. And there it was, huddled away from its fellows, they
sensed they should avoid it.
Dementors floated by him, happy to ignore him now for he had fed them plenty
with his thirst for revenge. This was much better than sucking happiness out of
a soul, this fed them like a feast and they sucked and sucked until they were
satisfied, but they still hadn't removed all of Snape's anger or his avenging
spirit. They knew they never would and so they left him to do his work, work
that they couldn't see but could only sense as soft screams on the air. Oh,
they would feast tonight and the glided back towards the fortress, getting
ready.
Severus stood up and dropped what he needed into the potion, a flea. Just
enough potion for two.
Did they think that Azkaban would save them from his wrath? Severus glided
towards the prison, his billowing robes so like those of the Dementors that
those prisoners whose cells he passed cried out in despair as they pressed
themselves further against the walls of their tiny cells.
Filch and Lydia Rookwood were in cells side by side, both of them already on
the verge of insanity in the short time they'd been here. Filch screamed when
Snape entered his cell and Snape hoped he was reliving what Poppy had done to
him. "No! Please! Anything! I'll do anything! Just make it stop! Make it stop!"
"Drink this," ordered Snape. "Then it will all be over."
Filch blinked, as if he suddenly recognised Snape. "Professor! You've come to
save me? An easy death?" he gasped, looking around for the Dementors but seeing
none.
Snape just smiled. It would be Death indeed, but it would not be easy. Filch's
last moments would not be merciful. He had no mercy left for those who had hurt
Harry. Filch opened his mouth obediently, like a chick about to receive
nourishment from its mother. Severus measured out the drops carefully before
shoving Filch down on the ground and stalking over to Lydia Rookwood's cell.
She didn't give a flicker of recognition as Snape entered her cell. He tilted
her head back and tipped the potion down her throat. She swallowed, beyond
thinking at that point and Snape briefly wondered which of her worst memories
it was that finally broke her at the hands of the Dementors.
The Dementors let him leave without incident. He had no illusions why. Tonight
they would have two new souls to feast on.
***
Harry woke up slowly, his head always felt fuzzy after Dreamless Sleep. He
reached for his glasses on the nightstand, before realising they weren’t there.
They hadn't been there, David had carried him back to the school but his
glasses were probably still lying on the mud soaked ground, broken and cracked,
just like his body had been.
Harry hadn't looked at himself yet, he was scared to see what he looked like
now, but he could not avoid it forever, especially when a sharp pain from his
bladder indicated that he needed the loo soon. Severus was lying asleep, his
upper torso leaning on the bottom of Harry's bed. Harry moved his leg and
Severus' eyes opened at once.
"Harry? Are you all right? Do you need more pain potion?"
Harry shook his head. "No - I have to go the loo," he said, flushing. "I can't
- I can't look." Harry felt the tears dampen his cheeks. "They were r- right
all a- along. I am a freak." Harry hung his head on his knees and sobbed.
Severus stroked his back, his neck. "You're not a freak, Harry. This has
happened to other people too. Poppy has some books about it for you."
"She does?" Harry glanced up and blinked his tears away.
"Yes, people sometimes have had accidents, or it was done deliberately, but you
are not alone, Harry."
"He - he said no-one would want me after this," panted Harry. Would Severus
turn him away? Not want him anymore?
"He's a raving lunatic, Harry. Do you really want to believe anything he said?"
Harry shook his head and climbed out of bed, his legs were a bit unsteady, his
balance was slightly different now, but if he could face down a Dark Lord time
and time again, shouldn't he be able to handle going to the bathroom even if he
did have parts missing?
"Harry! Just where do you think you're going?" demanded Madam Pomfrey as she
rounded the privacy curtain. "Get back into bed at once!"
"Toilet," said Harry miserably.
"Then you can use a bed pan."
"No, please, let me do this on my own. Please."
She clucked her tongue at Harry's resistance, but relented. "Very well, but
come straight back here. The Occulist is here to see you for new glasses."
Harry nodded and made his way to the bathroom. He supposed he should be
thankful that Filch hadn't removed everything. He wondered how he would have
been able to go the loo if he no longer had a prick, would they have had to
turn him into a girl or something? He didn't feel like a girl, he didn't know
if it was his imagination or not but he did feel sort of less masculine. Not
that he'd ever been some brawny type anyway, he was too short and skinny to
have ever looked like that. He'd never had much body hair to begin with and he
hadn't started shaving yet, he guessed now he never would need to.
The potions were certainly helping, he no longer felt in any pain and he lifted
the gown and gingerly looked down at himself. He looked more normal than he
expected. His prick was there, but instead of resting on his balls like it had
done before, it was just the smoothness of his body and had two thin scars
underneath it. It was more than the relief of letting go of a full bladder that
caused him to sigh.
***
The headmaster entered the infirmary before Harry returned from the bathroom, a
Daily Prophet clasped under his arm, his purple robes flapping like some exotic
bird. He stopped by Harry's bed and then looked from the empty bed to Severus.
"Have you seen the paper?" he demanded, throwing it on the bed.
"No, I've been with Harry all night," Severus lied easily. "I haven't seen any
papers yet."
"Then you won't have known that Lydia Rookwood and Argus Filch died last
night."
"No, I would not have known that. How did they die?" He asked casually, even
though he knew full well.
"Well, according to the papers, both of them succumbed to bubonic plague. Not
very likely in this day and age, is it?"
"I don't know, Albus. All it takes is one infected rat or flea and you could
have an epidemic."
"None of the other prisoners got sick," protested Dumbledore. "I know you had
something to do with it, Severus."
"Really, Albus. Sometimes your imagination rivals even the students' for tall
tales. Tell me, how was I supposed to give them bubonic plague? It's not very
subtle, is it?"
Dumbledore paused, as if thinking. "No, I suppose not. You would have made it a
lot more subtle, undetectable poisons, that sort of thing."
"There you are then," said Severus, reaching for the paper and scanning the
headlines. "Terrible tragedy, before they've even been tried and convicted."
Severus set the paper aside. "I presume in light of Harry's attack, the plan is
off?"
"What? No, of course not. Five more days, Severus and then you must take him to
Voldemort as we agreed. As you agreed. You're not getting cold feet now, are
you?"
"No, of course not, headmaster. It shall be as you wish." Over my dead body. If
Dumbledore thought Severus was going to go anywhere near the Dark Lord with
Harry in tow, then he was a lot more senile that Severus had first thought.
When the headmaster left, Severus went to Poppy and told her everything about
what Dumbledore had planned for Harry. A plan that at first, Severus had gone
along with, but gradually realised that Dumbledore was madder than a hatter and
the plan would never work. Voldemort would see right through it at once.
"You do know what you have to do, don't you, Severus? You have to tell Harry."
"I know, but I don't know how. He'll hate me, Poppy. I can't bear for him to
hate me. Not now."
"He deserves the truth, Severus. How do you think he'd feel if he found out
some other way? During Occlumency or something? That would be much worse, don't
you think?"
Severus nodded, knowing the medi-witch was right did not make it any easier to
tell Harry, but the only way they could foil the plan was if Harry knew about
it and then maybe both of them could figure out some way to prevent it. They
stopped discussing it when the Occulist arrived, a tall, pale man in his
fifties, hair hanging in a grey plait down his back, but his face unlined.
Harry stopped at the entrance door when he saw the stranger. "Harry, it's okay,
this is Mr. Collins, the Occulist I told you about. He's here to fit you for
new glasses."
Harry nodded and took a few steps further into the room, heading directly for
Severus and seeking his hand.
Severus squeezed Harry's hand and settled him in a chair while the Occulist
conjured his equipment. Harry's whole body was tense, as if afraid he was about
to tortured rather than have his eyes tested.
"Harry, haven't you been to Muggle opticians before?" Severus asked, stroking
his fingers along the backs of Harry's hands to try and calm him.
"No, the Dursleys never took me."
"Why were you wearing glasses then?"
"They were Dudley's old ones, before he got contact lenses."
The Occulist gaped in shock. "How on earth did you see?"
Harry shrugged, unwilling to discuss it further and the Occulist began his eye
exam.
Once finished, the prescription sorted, Mr. Collins handed Harry his new
glasses, small square metal frames that suited his face better than the round
frames ever had. Harry blinked, then blinked again, tears dripping down his
face.
"I can see! Oh, God, Severus, I can see!" He scrambled from the chair and
wrapped his arms around Severus. "I didn't know what things weren't supposed to
look fuzzy round the edges. Everything's so clear." Harry looked up. "You're so
clear."
"Come on, Harry, back to bed before Madam Pomfrey has my hide." He hoped Mr.
Collins thought Harry's enthusiasm was because he now had glassed that worked,
not that he was keen on his teacher.
Severus tucked him in and sat down on the chair by the side of the bed. Harry
saw the paper and quickly read the front page.
"They're both dead?" he asked.
"Yes, Harry. They are."
Harry knelt on the bed and wrapped Severus in a hug. "Thank you, Severus. Thank
you."
 
Part Sixteen
Severus pulled the privacy curtain around the bed and cast a powerful silencing
charm around both of them. Harry felt that the two of them were locked in their
own private little world and he didn't want to leave it. What would happen when
he left the infirmary? How was he supposed to get changed or shower with the
other boys in the dorms now? They would all notice how different he looked and
he didn't want to have to explain what had happened to him, what Filch had
done. To speak of it like that would make it all too real and Harry wasn't sure
he was ready to face that just yet. Managing to go to the loo by himself
without freaking out was a lot different than telling his friends.
"Severus? What's wrong?" asked Harry. He could sense the man wanted to say
something, but he was being very quiet.
"Harry, I have to tell you some things, things that you aren't going to like. I
don't even know where to begin."
"Just start at the beginning," suggested Harry.
"Before I fell in love with you, you mean?"
Harry's heart fluttered against his ribs then seemed to come to a complete
standstill. Severus was in love with him? He'd never mentioned that. Harry just
thought he fancied him, that he desired him, his body, not that love was
involved. At least not on Severus' side.
"You're in love with me?" he gasped. "Since when?"
"Since the day I spanked you and you cried in my arms. I couldn't bear to see
you hurting anymore and that's when I realised that I could no longer follow
Dumbledore's plan."
"Dumbledore's plan?" Harry had a theory, that Dumbledore smiled and wore bright
robes to distract everyone he was speaking to from how manipulative he was.
"Yes, Harry. The headmaster ordered me to give you those types of detentions. I
had permission to use whatever methods necessary, bar sexual, to get you to
submit."
Harry had not been on good terms with the headmaster since the end of fifth
year when he had finally revealed all that had been hidden from him over the
years, but he couldn't imagine him giving Severus permission to do that.
"Why?" demanded Harry. "Why would he ever agree to such a thing?"
Severus toyed with a loose thread on Harry's bedspread and would not meet his
eyes. Harry reached out and grasped the man's hand in his. "Severus, please,"
he begged. "Tell me why, don't I deserve at least that?"
Severus glanced up, Harry was appalled and surprised to find the man's eyes
swimming in tears. "You deserve so much more than that, Harry. More than I've
ever given you or ever could. Harry, I'm so sorry. For everything."
Harry scrambled across the bed and tugged the man forwards so that he could
reach over, kissing his eyelids, tasting the salty wetness on his tongue.
"You'll never forgive me, Harry," sobbed Severus as he leaned on Harry's
shoulder and now it was Harry's turn to give comfort to the man he loved. He
didn't know when he first realised that he loved Severus Snape, but nothing the
man did or said would have him hating him again, he knew that now. He might be
upset, but he wouldn't hate Severus.
"I'll be the judge of that," sighed Harry as he rubbed Severus' back until the
crying eased. Severus sat back down on the chair and wiped his cheeks, blinking
rapidly. His cheeks were blotchy and his eyes red rimmed, but to Harry none of
them were a sign of weakness. It showed how much he trusted Harry to be able to
cry in front of him.
"Go on, Severus, you can tell me."
Severus took a deep shuddering breath before he could begin. "While in the Dark
Lord's service, I wasn't just his tame Potions master, although that's what he
wanted me for in the beginning. I had other - duties," he said the word duties
as if it pained him and maybe it did. Harry had no illusions, he knew Severus
had done terrible things in his time as a Death Eater, he wouldn't have
survived this long if he hadn't.
"Go on," Harry urged, now that he'd got the man to start talking.
"I trained his prisoners, Harry. Male, female, it didn't matter to him. I
trained them to be submissives. I was the procurer of Voldemort's pets. He was
a demanding Master, but he did not want to take the time to train them himself.
He wanted them perfect, ready to serve him as soon as I presented them to him.
He wanted them subservient to them, willing to obey commands. He didn't believe
what he was doing was rape. They were his pets, his toys, his to do with as he
wished. I was very good at what I did."
"Severus? Did you - did you rape them too? To train them?"
"No, Harry, Voldemort was not one who would share his prizes. What I did was
worse, much worse. I broke their spirits until they were little more than
shells of their former selves, willing to obey any order, debase themselves
just for one touch from Voldemort. Some of them starved to death because they
did not have enough will of their own to eat, they had to be ordered to eat and
the Death Eaters never bothered to remember that. They didn't care, they were
only Muggles after all, plenty more where they came from. They were my
responsibility, even though Voldemort knew I couldn't be with them all the
time, I was already working at Hogwarts. Every time one of my charges died, I
was punished."
Harry paled at the man's words. I broke their spirits.. "And that's what
Dumbledore wanted you to do to me? Break me?" he demanded. "Why? Why would he
ask you do that?"
"Don't you want to know why I agreed?"
"I know why you agreed to it," snapped Harry angrily. "You wanted to punish me
the way you never got a chance to punish my father and his friends for all they
did to you. You wanted to bring the Gryffindor Golden Boy down a peg or two.
You wanted the Boy Who Lived cowering at your feet because you thought he was
an arrogant, selfish jerk just like his father." Harry yanked up his hospital
gown and yelled at him. "Well, am I broken enough for you now?!!"
"Oh, God, Harry, I'm sorry. I never meant for any of this to happen," Severus
reached out to touch him, but Harry backed away.
"Don't, I can't handle you touching me right now." Harry scooted back along the
bed to the headboard and leaned back against it. Severus had been doing it in
Dumbledore's orders. Was he even telling the truth when he said he'd been in
love with Harry? Just to keep doing whatever Dumbledore was planning?
"Harry, I started doing these things on Dumbledore's orders but somewhere along
the line, it went wrong. I wasn't supposed to fall in love with you. Dumbledore
hadn't anticipated that, he thought our mutual enmity would prevent that from
happening, but it didn't. I finally got to see the real you, beyond you scar,
beyond your father's face. I love you, Harry and I'm so sorry I ever agreed to
the plan."
"Do you really love me, Severus? Really and truly, not some ploy to keep doing
Dumbledore's plan?"
"I do, Harry. I do. Look into my mind and you'll see I'm telling you the
truth."
Harry nodded and cast Legilimens on Severus and instantly he was hurtling
through the man's memories of him. Severus comforting him after the spanking,
Severus watching him sleep in the retreat, kissing him, kissing his forehead,
his worry after the Quidditch stands had collapsed, his anger with Ron and
Hermione over leaving Harry alone. His righteous anger when he killed Filch and
Rookwood. His fear that Harry would turn away from him once he found out what
he'd starting doing on Dumbledore's orders.
Harry eased out of the man's mind gently. It was true, Severus did love him.
Harry was still upset, still angry, but he was also in love. "Severus, I will
never turn away from you. Not over this, not ever." Harry grabbed the man's
hand. "I know you thought you had good reasons at the time for agreeing, but
why did Dumbledore order you to do it in the first place?"
"Why do you think, Harry? Dumbledore and Voldemort have made a truce. He
doesn't think he'll be able to kill you outright, so he'll be quite happy to
have you under his control instead. Dumbledore wanted me to turn you into the
perfect submissive and present you to him like the spoils of war."
"What?" squawked Harry. "Why?"
"Harry, you're one of the wizarding world's most powerful wizards. A virgin
wizard. Sex magic is very powerful, Voldemort would use you in a ritual that
would make him even more powerful than ever and there will be no-one left to
resist him. The ritual would kill you. Dumbledore didn't tell me that, I'm not
sure he knows about that, but Voldemort has used his toys in this ritual in the
past to gain more power and I'm guessing that's what Voldemort would do if you
were ever brought before him a prisoner."
"You said they'd made a truce, what was Dumbledore supposed to get in return
for sacrificing me?"
"An assurance that those within Hogwarts would not be harmed in the coming war
and that he would no longer recruit Death Eaters from among the older
students."
"What about the rest of the wizarding world? The Aurors? Shops, businesses?
Private homes?"
"Voldemort gave no such assurances that they would not be harmed."
It didn't make much sense, sacrifice Harry to spare those handful of people at
Hogwarts? Not that those lives weren't important, they were, but they were so
few compared to the wider wizarding world. Harry could understand it if
Voldemort had gave assurances that no-one else would be harmed, but just
Hogwarts? Why risk so many when only so few could be spared as a consequence?
Was Dumbledore going mad? Or was there some more to the plan that he hadn't
even told Severus? But if somehow, the plan was to get him close enough to
Voldemort to attempt to kill him, why train him as a submissive at all?
Wouldn't it be better just to pretend to be one? So that he would be stronger
to attack? He was giving himself a headache at this rate.
"When were you supposed to take me to Voldemort?"
"Five days."
"Good, that'll give me a bit of time to get my strength back a little."
"Harry, you're not seriously thinking of going?"
"Of course I'm going, Severus. Tell me, what would happen if you didn't appear
when you were supposed to with me?"
"Then they'll know I've been spying. Every Death Eater in the land will be
hunting me."
"I'm going, Severus and together we're going to bring him down. Do you really
think I would let anything happen to my Master?" Harry grabbed his hand and
squeezed hard. "No-one messes with my Master, Severus. No-one."
 
Part Seventeen
Harry had never been in the dungeons below Malfoy Manor before and if by some
miracle they survived this, then he would prefer never to see them again. The
bare stones had been painted over, murals depicting men, women and children
suffering every from of torture imaginable and some that Harry had never
imagined in his life. He did not shudder or throw up though, knowing that they
were expecting him to show no emotion except when his Master dictated it.
They had taken his wand, Severus had handed it to the Dark Lord as soon as
they'd entered the cell, but what Voldemort didn't know was that Harry was an
adept at wandless magic. He didn't need a wand as long as he was angry enough
for the spells to work. Finding the opportunity to cast them was another
matter. He hadn't been bound, they thought that because he was now submissive
he would not attempt anything. Severus and Harry were keen to let them believe
that.
There were only four people in the cell, Harry, kneeling on the floor, his
forehead resting on the slimy floor as he prostrated himself before Voldemort.
Voldemort standing in front of him, flanked both by Severus and Lucius Malfoy.
Harry's scar was aching unbearably being in such close proximity to the Dark
Lord, but unfortunately their link had no debilitating effect on the monster
whatsoever. Harry dimly wondered how Malfoy had escaped Azkaban, but he was too
worried for what might happen to Severus and himself to give it much attention.
Malfoy was dressed in formal robes of dark blue, embroidered with silver snakes
on both lapels. Harry wasn't sure whether it was an hallucination due to his
time spent on the floor, but he thought he saw the snakes writhing and hissing
when he'd first entered the cell.
Harry was dressed in a long robe of dark green velvet, it pooled on the floor
by his knees, like a storm tossed sea and Harry wondered if they were both
going to drown here in Malfoy's dungeons. Not even the headmaster knew where
they were, for Voldemort had not given Severus any former indication of where
he was going to take them. They were on their own and the weight of his destiny
had never seemed so heavy to Harry. He only had this one chance. If he failed
now, it would all be for nothing. Voldemort would destroy him and every other
wizard who stood in his way. Harry could not fail. It just wasn't an option.
"Impressive, Severus," said Voldemort. "But is it true? Have you really broken
him? It seems to good to be true. Lucius, you may begin."
"Thank you, my Lord," said Lucius as he bent down and lifted Harry's chin up
with a pale, pointed finger. Harry tried not to shudder, they'd both known this
test was coming and they'd prepared for it as best they could in the past few
days, but since neither of them knew exactly what was coming things might go
wrong.
"Legilimens!"
Harry didn't block, but he steered Malfoy in his mind only to those memories
that he wanted Malfoy to see. Harry, kneeling on Snape's office floor, obeying
him even though Harry's knees were aching. Snape spanking him and Harry crying
over it. Harry sobbing over Snape's disregard for his comfort, feeling joy when
Snape paid him even a little bit of attention. Malfoy must have seen enough,
Harry could feel the man's mind withdrawing, the relief once the invader was
out of his mind. He tried to school his face to remain impassive. Harry wasn't
real to Voldemort and Malfoy, he was a toy, something to play with and break it
if they wished. He hoped things wouldn’t get that far.
"Well?" demanded Voldemort.
Lucius stood up and smiled. "It is as Severus has said, he has trained the boy
as a submissive."
"Is he still a virgin?"
"Yes, my Lord. His aura is still white."
Harry did not speak, he did not have permission to speak but he kept his head
where Lucius had left it, he didn't bow again. Voldemort stalked towards him in
a swirl of crimson robes. They swished across the floor, sweeping dust in their
wake. The monster looked down.
"Who would have thought it, Potter? The Boy Who Lived bowing and scraping at my
feet? What would your friends say if they could see you now? Would they be
pleased? Kiss my robe, boy," hissed Voldemort and Harry completely lost it. Who
would have thought that it was what had caused Harry to freak out with Severus
was the reason the Dark Lord was finally defeated? It was the one word to
guarantee that Harry would never submit.
"AVADA KEDAVRA!!!!" Harry screamed with all his might. Green light shot forth
from his body, enveloping Voldemort in its eerie shimmer. When the light
dimmed, Voldemort crashed to the floor of the dungeon, his lifeless body
shattering on impact with the stones. "You shouldn't have called me boy!"
yelled Harry to Voldemort's dead body. The adrenalin from the spell wearing
off, Harry slumped to the ground and promptly threw up what little he'd eaten
that morning. He was trembling all over, every bone in his body ached, as if he
was coming down with flu or something, but he knew he had to get Severus away
from here.
Harry was the only person left conscious after the spell. He rushed to the
prone form of Severus, feeling for a pulse in his neck. Finding one, he cast a
binding spell on the unconscious Malfoy, wrapped his arms around Severus' prone
form and pressed the jewel in his medallion.
They both landed in a heap on the safe room floor as Harry struggled to support
the Potion master's weight. Harry levitated Severus to the bed and cast an
ennervate on him. Severus' eyes flickered open and he blinked at his rescuer.
"Harry? What happened? What are we doing here?"
Harry yanked the man's sleeve up and there, where the Dark Mark used to be was
a patch of shiny pink skin.
"It's over, Severus. He's gone. He's finally gone. You're free."
Severus looked at his arm and then at Harry's face. "Harry, your scar, it's
gone too. Merlin, you did it, you really did it. How? What happened?"
"A wandless Killing Curse."
"Wandless? See, Harry, I said you were a powerful wizard, didn't I?"
Harry nodded just as a scroll popped into existence in the room, the Ministry
seal dangling from one end. "Uh-oh."
Harry untied the ribbon and his eyes scanned the letter, a knot of fear forming
in the pit of his stomach as he read on.
To Mr. Harry Potter,
It has come to our attention that at 3.07 p.m. this afternoon that you
knowingly cast a spell while not in residence at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft
and Wizadry. This contravenes the Restriction of Underage Sorcery. A
representative from the Ministry will be sent to Hogwarts shortly.
Please consider yourself suspended from Hogwarts until after the hearing on 20
November.
Yours sincerely,
Dolores Umbridge
Officer in Charge
Magical Law Enforcement
The letter dropped from Harry's nerveless fingers. That woman, that vile, awful
woman was now in the Magical Law Enforcement office? Who would be so stupid as
to put her in charge of anything? A hearing. Harry remembered another hearing,
with chairs with chains on the arms and he had a feeling that this time, those
were the chairs he would be placed in.
"Harry what is it?" asked Severus rising from the bed and bending down to lift
the letter from the floor. Harry could barely speak for the rage that was
coursing through his veins. He'd just destroyed what was probably the world's
most evil wizard of all time and now they wanted to take him to task for using
under age magic? It might even have been funny if it hadn't been for the shadow
of Azkaban falling over everything. Dementors. His mother's screams.
Harry had used an Unforgivable curse on another human being.
Severus must have guessed what he'd been thinking. "Harry, Voldemort had been
travelling Dark paths so long that he stopped resembling anything human long
ago. He was a pestilence on the land, you exterminated him. You did nothing
wrong. Nothing. This was your destiny, Harry. You were fated to do this or he
was fated to kill you. Which would you have preferred?"
"God, Severus, what are we going to do?"
"The first thing we need to do it get back to Hogwarts and inform Dumbledore
that it worked. He can alert the Order and the Aurors can start hunting the
Death Eaters, who no doubt are probably all wondering why their Marks have
suddenly disappeared. Then you are going to get lots of rest, even if I have to
tie you to a bed myself. Magic that powerful, especially wandless magic takes a
lot out of you."
"What if they put me in Azkaban? I couldn't handle that, Severus."
"Harry, you won't get sent to Azkaban. You were only doing what they all wanted
from you. They wanted you to destroy Voldemort, do you really think they're
about to sentence the Boy Who Lived to Azkaban for it?"
"She would," Harry said vehemently. "She's hated me even before she met me.
Umbridge wants me locked up, Severus. I just know it. She'll not be happy with
just an expulsion from Hogwarts."
"Harry," Severus stepped closer to him and opened his arms. Harry quickly
accepted the comfort that was being offered and burrowed his face in Severus'
robes, feeling his breath becoming even more erratic and uneven. He just wanted
to curl up somewhere safe and stay there until he graduated. "Harry, you won't
be expelled, do you really think Dumbledore would allow that to happen?"
"I don't know anymore, Severus. I never thought he would ask you to train me as
a submissive after he made a truce with Voldemort. He may well expel me, we
don't know, do we?"
"No, I suppose we don't," sighed Severus.
"Can we stay here?" asked Harry. "Just the two of us? No-one can disturb us
here, can they?"
"No, Harry, they can't. But that also means that we will not be able to get
food."
"I don't care!" protested Harry. "I'd rather starve to death than face the
Dementors in Azkaban. Please, Severus, promise me that you won't let them take
me to Azkaban. I couldn't survive that, hearing my mother's screams over and
over. Promise me you'll do whatever it takes to prevent that."
"I promise, Harry," said Severus and he kissed Harry's hair. "Time to go,
Harry?"
Harry nodded, unable to look at him as they each pressed their medallions to
bring them back to school.
Briefly Harry wondered why he was no longer feeling as if he was coming home.
 
Part Eighteen
As they both made their way up the moving staircase, Severus couldn't help but
notice how white Harry was. His lips were bright red, seeming so much brighter
against the paleness of his face. He was trembling slightly too and Severus
knew he must be feeling the after affects of casting an Unforgivable curse for
the first time. He would have to watch him carefully for the next few days.
Dark Magic was addictive and once tasted, it got easier and easier to do,
without thinking of the consequences, only wanting more and more of that
forbidden power, Severus knew from experience.
Dumbledore was waiting for them, his office door open already when they arrived
at the top of the staircase. Fawkes squawked from his perch, ruffling his
feathers and regaling both of them with his beady eyes.
"Welcome back, my boys," he said, smiling. Severus did not return the smile.
"It is finally done then?" He took in Harry's face and then stared at Severus,
who pulled up the arm of his robe. "Excellent, excellent. I knew you could do
it, Harry."
Dumbledore communicated silently with the phoenix, who disappeared in a burst
of golden flame.
"Might I ask how you achieved it, Harry?" Dumbledore peered at Harry over the
rim of his glasses and Severus just knew the headmaster was attempting
Legilimency on Harry without the boy's permission. He coughed so that Harry
looked at him and not the headmaster. A simple foil but it worked and he could
almost sense the headmaster's frustration as not being able to access Harry's
mind.
"A wandless spell," said Harry, swaying a little. The headmaster had offered
neither of them a seat. Severus pressed his hand on the small of Harry's back
to support him a little, noticing the headmaster's glare but ignoring it.
"Wandless?" repeated Dumbledore, turning his attention back to Harry. "I don't
suppose Voldemort was expecting that, was he?"
"No, sir," said Harry. He showed Dumbledore the letter he'd received. "The
Ministry have suspended me from school."
"Have they indeed? Well, you see, Harry, Hogwarts is a private institution. The
Ministry has no authority over suspensions or expulsions, that would be down to
the governors and the headmaster. However, I doubt that the governors would
require your removal considering that you have just fulfilled your destiny.
It's getting late, Harry. I suggest you go back to your dorms and get well
rested for your classes tomorrow. If you do not attend, I'm afraid it will have
to be detention for you."
"Yes, sir. Thank you, Professor," said Harry, his beaming smile brighter than
the light in the room. "See you in Potions, Professor," Harry stood on tip toes
and gave Severus a small peck on the cheek. Severus flushed, but allowed it.
There wasn't a lot the headmaster could do except fire him now and he no longer
cared if that happened anymore.
***
As soon as Harry entered the portrait hole to the Gryffindor common room, he
was almost knocked backwards by Hermione's welcome hug. "Harry! You're back!"
she shrieked, making his ears ring. Ron stood off to one side, smiling softly,
pleased at his friend's return, but not as demonstrative as Hermione about it.
"Where have you been? What happened? You weren't in the infirmary and Madam
Pomfrey wouldn't tell me where you'd gone," said Hermione once she released him
from the hug. The few other scattered Gryffindors who weren't in bed yet were
staring at the three friends, eager to hear Harry's news as well. Harry didn't
speak, he just lifted his fringe out of his eyes and they all gaped at the
smooth skin they saw there.
"He's gone?" asked Neville, walking towards them and reaching out as if to
touch Harry's head. Harry backed away from him, not feeling comfortable about
that. Neville lowered his hand. "Sorry. So it's true then, what the Slytherins
are saying Filch did to you?"
"What are they saying?" asked Harry, his heart beating so fast he was surprised
it didn't suddenly burst forth from his chest.
"That he attacked you that he - that he raped you," said Hermione softly.
"He attacked me, yes," agreed Harry. "He beat me, kicked me, hurt me
physically, but he didn't rape me. Let me guess, Malfoy started that rumour?"
They all nodded. Why would Malfoy start such a malicious rumour in the first
place? Did he really hate Harry that much? He would probably hate him even
more, knowing that it was Harry's actions that would land the elder Malfoy in
Azkaban yet again.
Harry felt as if all his energy had drained out of him and he just wanted to go
and lie down, but a few of the older students hurried off to wake their
classmates and soon the common room was awash with crowds of eager listeners
wanting to hear in detail how Harry had managed to defeat Voldemort.
***
"How did he do it, Severus?" asked Dumbledore once Harry had left. "How was he
strong enough to even attempt a wandless spell when you were supposed to train
him as a submissive? He should not have been able to do anything without
express permission, should he?"
"A bit surprised to see us back, Albus?" sneered Severus. "Wanted Voldemort to
get rid of him for you?"
"I don't know what you're talking about, Severus. Things went according to
plan."
"Whose plan, Albus? Did you forget how good I am at Occlumency and Legilimency?
I know what you wanted, Dumbledore. You'd hoped that they would both die, the
prophecy was not exactly clear, was it? You're afraid of Harry, afraid of his
power. Afraid he might turn out to be the next Dark Lord. Harry wasn't supposed
to survive this, was he? With Harry gone, you knew you'd garner sympathy votes
and people would be on your side again. You enjoy manipulating people, it's all
some game to you. Harry was never a person to you, was he? He was just a plan,
a tool a pawn. What will you do to us now that you no longer have need of us,
Albus? Are you like Voldemort, will you cast out your broken toys? You make me
sick," spat Severus. "You've done nothing but use that boy since the night you
left him on a doorstep."
"And what about you, Severus? How do you think people will react when they find
out what you did to him? You were the one who trained him as a submissive, you
were the one who abused him."
"You have no idea what you're talking about, headmaster, you never did. Being
submissive is not about giving total control over to another person, it is not
about abuse. I trained Harry as my pet, Albus, I was his Master, do you know
what that means?"
Dumbledore bristled. "I am not aware of the subtleties of those types of
relationships," he muttered angrily, proof enough of how he thought of those
types of relationship.
"No? I'll enlighten you then, shall I? Harry trusted me enough to allow me to
hurt him, he knew I would go so far and no further, that is the Master's
responsibility. It is not about abusing one's pet. Harry was the one in control
the whole time, there were certain things he would never do. Voldemort made a
fatal mistake, he thought he was the one in control of Harry, but the only
person who had control over Harry in that cell was Harry."
"It will still come across as abuse if this knowledge is ever made public,
Severus. You are his teacher," threatened Dumbledore.
"Is that a threat? You want to talk about abuse, headmaster? Let's talk about
what the Dursleys did to him, shall we? You knew about it and still you sent
him back there year after year, not even bothering to check up on him. Harry
hasn't told me everything that happened to him, but I can make a good guess.
Harry was an abused child and you let it continue unchecked. What would the
wizarding world say if that knowledge got out?"
"You wouldn't air Harry's dirty laundry in public," said Dumbledore smugly. "I
know you wouldn't."
"I'm a Slytherin, Dumbledore, you don't know what I would do."
"Might I remind you, Severus that you are still in my employ and that
fraternising with a student is strictly forbidden?"
"Oh, it's forbidden now that Voldemort is defeated?" growled Severus, knowing
that both he and Harry had been used by this man for years.
"I think we understand each other, Severus."
"You can rest easy, headmaster. You have my assurances that nothing will happen
between Harry Potter or myself as long as he is a student and I am a teacher
here." With that, Severus stalked out with a swirl of robes and did not look
back.
***
Despite his exhaustion, Harry stayed awake until all of his dorm mates were
asleep and crept out under his invisibility cloak and made his way down to the
dungeons. He missed Severus so much and he couldn't wait until tomorrow to see
him. The corridors were deserted and Harry had to remind himself that Filch was
no longer there and could no longer harm him, he kept jumping at shadows
thinking he saw him or the cat.
Severus' office door was open, Harry knocked before entering, but the room was
empty and the door to the man's private quarters was ajar. Harry had a sinking
feeling in the pit of his stomach. Severus would not go without his wards for a
very good reason. Had Death Eaters somehow managed to get into the castle and
attack him?
Harry shoved the cloak from his shoulders and ran to the doorway, the room was
a mess, books and papers all over
the floor and furniture, clothing draped haphazardly over everything. An open
trunk stood in front of the fireplace.
This was worse, much worse than Death Eaters. Severus was leaving. Leaving
Hogwarts. Leaving Harry.
As soon as Severus emerged from the bathroom carrying a few potions bottles,
Harry stormed into the room, slamming the door behind him.
"You promised!" screamed Harry. "You promised you would never leave me!" His
face was dry of tears, he felt too crushed to cry.
Severus glared hard at him. "Is that any way to speak to your Master? On your
knees at once," he growled.
Harry obeyed instinctively, even though his heart was shattering into a
thousand tiny pieces in his chest. He could hardly breathe. He wanted to rant
and argue, but knew that it was not the time. Not when he was in the company of
his Master instead of Severus. Harry lowered his head, staring at the floor and
this time the tears fell, landing with soft plops on the dungeon floor.
He knew now why Hogwarts was no longer home. Home wasn't a place, a castle.
Home to him was Severus. He would not survive without him, he knew it.
"Please sir," he begged, unsure what he was asking for.
"You did not have permission to speak. Until I am finished, you will not speak.
Do you understand?"
Harry nodded.
"You are mine and mine alone, Harry. You caught me rather unawares this
evening. After I had finished packing, I was going to make my way up to the
Gryffindor dorms and ask you to come with me. Do you really think I'd leave you
here? Alone with a man I no longer trust? He no longer needs either of us and
we are not going to wait around for him to decide what he wants to do. You may
speak." His Master knelt down and kissed Harry softly on the lips before
pulling back, staring at Harry with dark eyes glittering.
"I - I thought you were going to leave me here," Harry confessed. "I can't live
without you, sir. I can't."
"You will never have to, Harry. We are leaving here, tonight. Gather whatever
things you want or need and meet me back here as quick as you can. We will not
be staying any longer than we have to. You do want to come with me, don't you?"
Harry nodded. "Master? What will I tell Ron and Hermione?"
"You may owl them when we get to our destination. We can't stay here, Harry. We
have to leave tonight."
"Where are we going, sir?"
"At the moment, Harry? I just don't know."
 
Part Nineteen
Severus had always been a paranoid man, knowing that his duplicity could be
discovered at any moment meant that he had plenty of contingencies in place. He
had numerous Muggle bank accounts, passport and other identity papers under the
assumed name of John Fletcher and John Fletcher also had a small cottage in
Cornwall.
He decided they should hide out there for the next few days before they made
any more permanent plans. One thing was clear, Harry was no longer safe in the
wizarding world. If the Ministry and Dumbledore were against him, he wouldn’t
stand a chance.
There was a small Muggle village, Hogsfell, about three miles from the school.
They would walk there and catch the first train into Edinburgh and then down to
London before making their way to Cornwall. There were plenty of car hire
places in London. The Death Eaters would never think of Muggle transport, but
Dumbledore might, hence Severus' alias. No-one knew he and John Fletcher were
one and the same.
It took less than half an hour for Harry to return with his packed trunk and
empty owl cage, levitating both in front of him. "I sent Hedwig to the Burrow,"
said Harry, looking rather worried. Severus could hardly blame him for that.
They were effectively on the run and they had to leave the school without
anyone knowing. At least they didn't have Filch to worry about this time, a new
caretaker had yet to be appointed. "Do you still have your invisibility cloak,
Harry?" Severus asked him. "I think we may need it until we get out of the
grounds."
Harry nodded and rummaged in his trunk for the cloak, one legacy from James
Potter that Severus was very glad of at that moment. "Shrink your things,
Harry, but once we leave the grounds, you can't do any more magic as you're
still underage and the Ministry will know."
They would have to walk to the village, an Assisted Apparation would alert the
Ministry that a qualified wizard had an underage wizard with him, they couldn't
risk it. "Are you up to walking, Harry? It's about three miles to Hogsfell."
"I'm not worried about the walk, Severus. It's my magic," said Harry.
"I already told you, Harry, you can't do any magic once we leave the school
grounds."
"I know, it's not that. It's just sometimes my magic happens without me doing
anything. What if I can't control it? The Ministry will know where we are."
"Harry, do you trust me?"
The boy nodded. "With my life."
"There's a spell I can do, it will inhibit any spontaneous magic. You will
still be able to do magic, but only when you want to. You will control it. Will
you allow me to perform it on you?"
"It'll stop me doing magic accidentally?"
"Yes."
"Please, Severus. Do it."
Severus cast the spell and then shrunk Harry's trunk and owl cage for him.
Harry picked up the small cube and tucked it in his jeans pocket. Both of them
would be travelling light. Severus had already shrunk his own things and
transfigured his robes into a Muggle suit and tie, Harry was dressed in jeans
and a sweatshirt, with a jacket over it. Severus cast a heating charm on it for
him, it didn't look very warm and was also about three sizes too big for him.
He tried to shrink it to fit, but the Muggle clothes didn't take to magic very
well and it didn't work. Harry would just have to put up with the ill fitting
clothes until they could go shopping.
"Ready?" he asked, holding out his hand.
Harry nodded and reached out to take it, the cloak falling over them like
water.
***
Harry's feet were sore and blistered, the shoes were Dudley's and were a few
sizes too large, he'd stuffed a pair of socks in the toes of each shoe, but
they were still a bit loose and rubbed against Harry's heel and his instep
every time he walked. They arrived at Hogsfell station at half past three in
the morning, and the first train wasn't until six forty five. The village
wasn't large enough to have an hotel, all the shops were shut and the gates of
the station were locked.
They wandered the high street, looking for somewhere open to spend a few hours,
but they were out of luck, they ended up sitting on some benches overlooking
the village green. Harry just hoped they weren't sent on their way by the
police or something before the station opened. He still felt a bit shaky and
would feel better once they were on the train and going away from Hogwarts.
Away from Dumbledore.
It was difficult to believe that Dumbledore had wanted him killed too, but when
they'd first arrived back, Harry had sensed the headmaster's disappointment and
he'd quickly cast a silent Legilimens on the man, for he was fed up of finding
everything about his life second hand, and only those bits that people thought
he ought to hear. Harry was shocked at what he'd discovered in the man's mind.
He hadn't even told Severus, but he was going to have to tell him what he knew.
That was one conversation he was dreading.
Dumbledore was not some sweet grandfatherly figure, although that was the
persona he cultivated as headmaster of the school. There was only one reason he
was at the school and not the Ministry, he felt there was more power to be had
at Hogwarts, more young minds for him to mould into what he wanted. He
manipulated Harry's parents into working for the Order, when neither of them
had wanted to do it, he manipulated Severus into spying for him on the Death
Eaters, but what was worse, much worse, was that Dumbledore had manipulated a
damaged boy, leaving him no choice but to join the Death Eaters in the first
place. Dumbledore engineered Severus' flight to them, just so that he could
welcome Severus back with open arms and have himself a ready made spy. It was
this that Severus didn't know. Harry didn't know how he could tell him.
Despite the warming charm Severus had cast on his clothes, Harry shivered and
wrapped his arms around himself. The night was frosty and their breath misted
silver in front of them. "Harry? Do you need an extra coat?" asked Severus as
he delved into his pocket to bring out his luggage and de-shrink it.
"No, I'm not cold, just a bit shaky. I wish we were already away from here.
We're not safe yet, are we?"
"I don't think we'll ever be safe, Harry," Severus whispered softly and kissed
his hair. "Here, put your head on my lap, maybe you'll be able to get a few
hours sleep."
"I don't think I'll be able to sleep," said Harry, but he put his head down on
Severus' lap anyway, enjoying the man's closeness. They hadn't had much chance
to be together since his attack, what with Harry being in the infirmary and
then killing Voldemort and running away. Severus stroked his head and whispered
a spell, "Somnus," and the next thing Harry knew he was gently woken by Severus
caressing his cheek.
"The station's open, Harry, I've just seen a ticket officer arrive."
"Oh, okay," said Harry, clasping his hand over his mouth as he yawned and sat
up. He'd drooled in his sleep, there was a shiny wet patch on the thigh of
Severus trousers, but a quick cleaning spell soon took care of that and they
made their way to the station to buy tickets. Harry was surprised when Severus
paid for them with a credit card, he wouldn't even have been sure that the
wizard knew what they were. As Severus retrieved the tickets and cards, Harry
noticed the name on the front, John Fletcher.
Once they were on the station and waiting for the train, Severus turned to him.
"In the Muggle world, I am known as John Fletcher, Harry and you are my nephew
Harry Fletcher, son of my brother Stephen, okay? Your parents died and I was
made your guardian. Otherwise my neighbours will be wondering why I've turned
up with a teenager in tow."
"You mean you don't want them to think I'm your sex slave, Uncle John?" grinned
Harry, feeling a little giddy now that he knew the train was going to be here
at any minute. They were escaping.
"Exactly," Severus grinned back just as the train pulled into the station. They
found seats in an empty compartment and Severus locked the door and cast a
silencing charm so that they would not be disturbed. Not that there were a lot
of passengers this early, a couple of businessmen had got on at Hogsfell,
probably commuting to Edinburgh, but Harry was glad all the same. He didn't
want to be sitting with some strangers for the next couple of hours. He sat
down opposite Severus and placed his hands on his knees.
"Severus, do you mind if I ask you a question?"
"It depends on the question," he said as the train pulled out of the station.
"I didn't know wizards knew about credit cards and things. I thought - I
thought you were pureblood?"
"I am, but my life as a spy was always dangerous. I needed somewhere to hide
out and none of the Death Eaters would ever assume that a pureblood like myself
would know anything about the Muggle world, never mind hide in it. It just
wouldn't occur to them. I don't know everything about Muggles or their world,
but I knew enough to get by when I was lying low. I'm not sure my identity is
strictly legal in the Muggle sense, but I felt no qualms about breaking Muggle
laws in order to survive. I still don't. I'm a Slytherin, Harry. Sometimes
Dumbledore forgets that. I do things that are necessary, not the things that he
wishes."
"Are we going to stay in Edinburgh? Wouldn't Dumbledore look there? He probably
knows about Hogsfell."
"He does, but I'm hoping we'll have a head start. We're going to London and
then driving to Cornwall, your uncle has a cottage there," smiled Severus. "No-
one in the wizarding world knows my Muggle alias. I never trusted anyone with
it."
"Good," said Harry, grateful that Severus hadn't felt the need to tell
Dumbledore. The less that man knew the better. "I've never been to Cornwall, is
it nice?"
"Beautiful," sighed Severus. "The cottage is in the country, high on a cliff
overlooking the Atlantic, it's very remote, but there are two other cottages
nearby, Muggles, not wizards though."
"Those were the neighbours you were worried about?"
"Yes, so remember your story, Harry Fletcher."
"Yes, Uncle John."
 
Part Twenty
Once they arrived in London, Severus was determined to take Harry shopping,
despite the boy's reluctance, for the clothes he was wearing would have to go.
Not only didn't they fit, but they were frayed and torn and it was as if Harry
had a sign above him screaming runaway. They needed to blend in with the
Muggles, not stand out.
"Harry, what is it? Why don't you want different clothes?" For Severus was sure
he would have jumped at the chance to get rid of the awful hand-me-downs.
"I can't pay you back, all right? All my money is in Gringotts and if we go
there the Ministry will know where we are, won't they?"
Damn the boy and his pride. "It's a loan, Harry. You can pay me back when you
can. Once you're seventeen, your Gringotts account will automatically go into
privacy mode. Every wizard over seventeen will receive their vault key. You
don't even need to go anywhere near the bank. There's a spell to withdraw
items, I'll teach it to you on your birthday. I can assure you that money is
the least of our worries at the moment. So, are we getting you a new wardrobe
or not?"
"Okay, thanks, Severus. I didn't know that about Gringotts. I will pay you
back, I promise."
Severus nodded and pushed open the door to one of London's department stores
and held it open while Harry entered in front of him. Harry headed straight for
the men's department but it was obvious after a few minutes that they were
never going to find any clothes to fit Harry in there. The sales assistant
recommended they try the teenage department on the second floor. Severus
thought he must have gotten so used to Harry's size over the years, that he
hadn't actually noticed how small he was compared to average. Another thing to
lay at the Dursleys' door, Severus still hadn't forgotten Poppy's words on how
Harry was always malnourished when he returned to school after being with them.
The boy's teen clothing department was full of giggling female sales assistants
who didn't look as if they'd been long out of school themselves and they
hovered around Harry like bees round a fragrant flower. Most of them were
taller than Harry and kept wandering over to the changing rooms and asking him
if he needed any help. A very few squawked no's later, they left the boy alone
to try on the clothes. Rather than accept any help from the silly assistants,
Severus wandered among the items and selected what he thought might suit Harry
and what might fit.
Three hours later, Harry was the proud owner of a whole new wardrobe. They'd
bought everything from shirts to trousers, socks to underwear and Severus had
sent Harry downstairs with some money and practically ordered him to get a hair
cut in the hairdresser's he'd seen on the way up. It was also a good way on
ensuring that Harry didn't see how much everything cost. Severus had no need to
be reimbursed, but Harry's pride would not allow him to accept the clothes
otherwise. So if he happened to lose the receipt, he would have to make and
estimated guess of how much Harry should repay. A lower estimate.
Once Harry's purchases were paid for and wrapped up in various boxes and bags,
Severus made his way to the hairdresser's to meet Harry, stepping gingerly onto
the escalator and just hoping his bags wouldn't catch on any of the moving
parts. Amazing what Muggles could do in place of magic.
Harry was already finished and was waiting outside the door of the salon.
Severus almost dropped his shopping in surprise. Instead of the waif in
tattered hand-me-downs with a mop of unruly hair, stood a confident young man.
He was dressed in his new clothes, a pair of khaki trousers with pockets down
both sides with a cream and green checked shirt, the tail hanging loose over
the trousers (which seemed to be the Muggle fashion among the other adolescents
in the store.) The wild locks had been tamed into submission, slightly shorter
at the back, but seeming fuller on the top of Harry's head and his fringe, his
whole hair dotted with auburn highlights which glistened every time Harry
moved.
"Uncle John, do you like it?" asked Harry, twisting the hem of his shirt
nervously. Severus guessed it was probably the first time Harry had ever been
to a hairdressers, never mind have anything so drastic done as colouring his
hair.
"It's wonderful, Harry. It really suits you."
"Do you really think so? I've never had my hair done before."
"Well, we can make this a regular occurrence if you'd like, I'm sure we'd find
someone in Cornwall to fit you in."
"I've kept the receipt," said Harry, fumbling in his pocket and counting out
the change.
"No, Harry. You keep that. What if you want to buy yourself a treat?"
"Oh. Okay," said Harry, returning the money to his pocket, but although they
spent a few more hours looking round the shops, Harry didn't spend a penny of
it. He was obviously not used to treating himself, something else that Severus
was determined to rectify.
***
Harry fell asleep as soon as they left the London traffic behind, Severus knew
he really should get them both to Cornwall as soon as possible, but he took a
detour to Wiltshire and gently shook Harry awake. It was already dark, the
November evenings drawing in and Harry looked around at the blackness outside.
"Are we there yet?"
Severus smiled down at him, "Not yet, but I thought you might like to see
this."
Harry nodded and opened his door, climbing out a little unsteadily as he tried
to wake up properly. Severus held out his hand and was gratified that Harry
took it instantly, showing how much trust there was between them now.
Severus knew they were nearing their destination when Harry gave a small gasp
and stopped walking altogether.
"Severus? What is that? I feel - I feel all tingly."
"You're feeling the old magic, Harry, earth magic. This part of the country is
covered in ley lines and we're coming up to one of the strongest convergences."
Thankful that not a lot of Muggles were about in the dark, Severus cast lumos
and a small beam of light flared to life at the tip of his wand. There were a
few Muggles with torches edging close to the fence, from a distance that what's
their light would look like too.
Harry gaped at the stone circle revealed, although they couldn't get the full
effect in the dark, it was still impressive, despite the chain link fence
surrounding it.
"Stonehenge," gasped Harry. "I've read about that, I've never been here though.
My primary school class went on a school trip, but I wasn't allowed, it was too
expensive."
Severus' hand tightened on his wand at yet another casual remark by Harry of
how unfairly the Dursleys had treated him growing up and he ached to pay them a
visit sometime. Harry deserved so much better than how he'd been treated by
everyone and Severus knew he had to list himself among those who had mistreated
him. Instead of Harry, he'd been seeing the ghost of James Potter come back to
haunt him and he wanted to make James pay for what he'd done. Harry wasn't
James, had never even been like James, but Severus had let his memories of the
father cloud his judgement in regards to the son and it was long past time to
make amends for his actions.
"This feels so weird," said Harry, smiling. "It's like I've got ants crawling
all over me or something, it tickles."
"All wizards would feel something when in close proximity to earth magic, but
you'd feel it more than most. We'd better head on, there's quite a way to go
yet."
"Okay," said Harry, reaching for Severus' hand again. Severus heart gave a
giddy little jump as their skin touched, their connection as wizards magnified
by the magic thrumming through the earth beneath their feet, like the distant
buzzing of insects.
Once back in the car, Harry was asleep again almost at once, he must have been
exhausted. A sleeping Harry caused him to wonder about the sleeping
arrangements at the cottage. It had plenty of bedrooms, but Severus didn't know
which would be more prudent. Should he give Harry his own room and risk Harry
thinking of it as a rejection of the boy? Or should he assume they would be
sharing the same room and risk Harry being upset because Severus was making
assumptions about their relationship?
They had done nothing more intimate than a few kisses and such ever since Filch
had attacked him and Severus wasn't sure how much Harry was ready for yet, if
ever. He'd discussed it with Madam Pomfrey, but he and Harry had yet to discuss
it themselves and he knew they had to. Harry hadn't brought it up yet and
Severus was a bit reluctant to mention it himself in case he upset Harry any
more than he already was.
Not only would Harry have to cope with what Filch had done to him, there was
also whatever the Dursleys had done. Severus had an idea he knew what had
happened to cause Harry to use his safe-word that night, but Harry needed to
talk about it too. He had no illusions that one conversation was going to make
Harry better, but it would be a start.
Harry gave a soft snore and turned over on the seat, almost strangling himself
with the seatbelt in the process. Severus reached over with one hand and
smoothed out the strap, before stroking his fingers along Harry's jaw. The skin
was so smooth and Severus knew that because of what Filch had done, it would
always remain that way, Harry would never need to shave.
As he drove down the lane to the cottages, bare branches of trees scraped
against the car's bodywork, the lane was barely narrow enough for one car to
pass. Severus cut the engine when they were parked on the drive in front of his
cottage, but he didn't wake Harry yet, just looked at him, enjoying looking at
him without Harry getting self-conscious about it. For Harry had no idea of how
handsome he actually was.
The porch light came on from Mrs. Jensen's cottage, his nearest neighbour, and
he shook Harry awake. No telling what she might be thinking if he stayed in the
car any longer.
"Harry," he whispered. "We're home."
 
Part Twenty One
Harry smiled when he woke up, loving the way Severus had said we're home, as if
he wanted nothing better than to share his life with Harry. A home with Harry.
The cottage was surprisingly big, when Severus had mentioned it, he'd assumed
it would be something small and a bit run down, considering that Severus didn't
seem to spend much time there. Of course now that he'd seen it, he assumed it
must have had some magical preservations spells on it.
The lights flared to life as they got out of the car and Harry could see an
elderly grey haired women in dressing gown and slippers at the house next door,
her arms folded across her chest and glaring a bit at them, although she didn't
seem to think the lights going on by themselves were that unusual.
Instead of walking up the path towards his own cottage, Severus took Harry by
the elbow and steered him towards the neighbour. "Good evening, Mrs. Jensen,
this is my nephew Harry Fletcher. He'll be living with me now that his parents
are dead."
"It's a bit early for the Christmas holidays, isn't it?" she asked, peering
down at Harry in that way Aunt Petunia always had, as if Harry was something
she wouldn't want to find on the bottom of her shoe.
"Harry's older than he looks, he's left school already. He'll be helping me in
my shop once we get settled in."
"Good, good, can't abide laziness in youngsters," said Mrs. Jensen. Yes,
thought Harry, exactly like Aunt Petunia. "I was just making sure that you
weren't being robbed or anything, what with the house being empty for so long."
"Yes, thank you, Mrs. Jensen. Very kind of you to look after the place when I'm
not here. Not everyone would be so conscientious," Severus glowered at her, but
she didn't seem to notice that she had just been insulted. Harry tried not to
giggle. Severus was basically calling her a nosey old bat, but she seemed none
the wiser.
"Come along, Harry. Let's get you settled," he said, placing his hand on
Harry's shoulder and steering him back towards their own cottage, they both
called a quick goodnight to Mrs. Jensen as she waited by her own door until
they were at the front door. Once Severus managed to unlock the door, both with
keys and passwords whispered softly against the wood and the both entered the
hall, Harry's laughter could no longer be contained.
It bubbled up from his chest like lemonade and he doubled over with a stitch in
his side, he was laughing so hard, tears of mirth dripping down his cheeks. He
could see the fuzzy face of his ex-Potions master gaping at him in some
confusion.
"Harry? What is it? Is something wrong?"
"N- no," giggled Harry, trying to get a hold of himself. "Sorry, it was just so
funny, watching you insult her like that and she never even realised."
"I see sarcasm isn't wasted on you, Mr. Potter," he said in his best teacher's
voice.
"Well, no, sir. I had the best teacher," he grinned back at him.
"Indeed, well until we can go shopping, I'm afraid the cupboards are rather
bare this evening. We can order something in for tonight's dinner. What would
you like? Pizza, Indian or Chinese?" asked Severus as he searched among the
papers on the telephone table for some menus. Harry had of course seen
telephones before, had even used it a few times, but to see Severus Snape in
close proximity to such a Muggle device had him wondering if all of this was in
his imagination or if he was having a strange dream.
"Harry?" Severus prompted. "Dinner?"
"Oh. Oh, pizza. I've never had pizza before."
***
More than replete after chicken wings, garlic bread, half of a ham and
pineapple pizza and a rare treat for Harry, a fizzy soft drink, Harry was
feeling rather too stuffed to move. They'd forgone plates and had eaten
everything from the boxes and sipped their drinks straight from the cans, so at
least there wasn't any washing up to do. The boxes were spread out over the
coffee table and the smell of tomatoes and barbecue sauce permeated everything.
Harry itched to tidy things up, the Dursleys would never have allowed him to
leave the mess like this.
Harry stood up and began to gather up the boxes, feeling Severus' eyes boring
into his back. "Harry, come here," he said. Harry looked back over his shoulder
and saw that Severus had his arms held out, as if he wanted Harry to climb onto
his lap. Since that was one of Harry's new favourite things he do, he dithered
a bit. "But the mess," explained Harry, gesturing at the remains of their
dinner. "I can't - I can't- " Harry was almost sobbing now, not sure how to
explain. A quick spell later, everything had gone and Severus was holding his
arms out again.
This time Harry didn't hesitate and he climbed onto the man's lap, burying his
face in Severus' shirt as Severus stroked his back. "Harry, this is about the
Dursleys, isn't it? What they did to you? Do you want to talk about it?"
"I don't know how. It was so awful, Severus, you'll hate me, I know you will."
"Harry, nothing you can say will ever make me hate you. I love you and I know
they hurt you, do you think you were the only abused child to attend Hogwarts?
There were plenty in Slytherin, Harry. Myself included."
Harry turned his head to stare at him. "You?"
"Yes, me. My father was a rather bad tempered drunk and since he was drunk most
of the time, I soon learned to keep out of his way. A lesson learned from his
fists."
"I'm sorry," said Harry.
"It's all right, Harry. It was a long time ago, I'm over it, but you're not,
are you? Was it still going on?"
Harry nodded. "I was dreading having to go back in the summer, I knew it would
happen again. Dumbledore knew, Severus. He knew what they were doing to me and
he sent me back there every year, knowing that they would hit me, starve me and
- and ..." Harry's voice broke as he remembered everything the Dursleys had
ever done to hurt him, to humiliate him.
"Ssh, Harry," soothed Severus. "You don't have to talk about this now if you're
not up to it."
"No, please, I want to tell you. It's just so hard, bear with me?"
Severus nodded and Harry continued. "Do you know what my Hogwarts letter said?
It was addressed to the cupboard under the stairs. The headmaster knew and he
did nothing about it!"
"Cupboard? What cupboard, Harry? I don't understand."
"The cupboard under the stairs, that's where I lived. I didn't have a bedroom
until the summer after my first year at Hogwarts. They locked me in when I
wasn't doing chores. I didn't even have a bed, just a mildewed mattress on the
floor with dirty sheets and blankets. I did the laundry, but I wasn't allowed
to wash my bedding or my own clothes, I was never allowed to wash myself
either. They wouldn't let me use the bathroom, I could clean it but not use it.
There were two buckets in my cupboard that I had to use but if I did, Petunia
would call me a dirty freak and I would get beaten black and blue for being so
disgusting." Harry clasped his hands together, feeling the urge to make sure
that they were clean. He'd never felt clean while he was living with the
Dursleys.
"Did no-one notice? What about your primary school?"
"Oh, the Dursleys had thought of that. They didn't want anyone to suspect how
badly they were treating me, so they even bought me a second hand uniform that
almost fitted me but I wasn't allowed to wash. I washed myself when I got to
school in the sinks in the boy's toilets, it wasn't great, but it was better
than smelling like my musty blankets. But once I was home from school, the
uniform had to come off and I was given dirty ill-fitting clothes again to do
my chores in. If I finished my chores in time, I was allowed to have dinner. I
was never finished in time, Severus, they gave me too much to do. I barely ate
when I was with them and because I was locked in, I couldn't even sneak out and
get something for myself. It was only after I came to Hogwarts that I realised
I'd been so badly mistreated by them and I wanted it to stop," Harry was
sobbing again, resting his head on Severus' shoulder as he cried and cried. "I
wanted it all to stop."
"Harry, that wasn't all that happened, was it? That night, the night you used
you word, do you remember?"
Harry nodded, sniffling. "I - I was six when he first started."
"Six?" gasped Severus in shock and Harry felt his heart jump into his throat.
It was too much, Severus would never like him again after knowing how much of a
slut Harry had been and he tried to wriggle away. Severus kept his arms locked
around him though and wouldn't let Harry escape. "Hush, Harry. I'm not angry
with you, I'm angry with him for doing that to a child. It wasn't your fault."
"B- but I let him do it," sobbed Harry. "It was my fault."
"How can you think that, Harry? How on earth was it your fault?"
"Vernon would unlock my cupboard at night when Petunia and Dudley were asleep.
He would take me to the living room and pull down my pyjama bottoms before
making me lie down on the sofa. Then he would whip me with his belt. I always
hid my head in the cushions, so I couldn't see what he was doing, but he always
made strange grunting noises and after a while I would feel something wet
splash onto my skin, on my back or my bottom."
Harry hadn't known what it was at the time, but he knew now and it didn't make
it any easier to bear.
"Dear Merlin," said Severus. "He masturbated over you while he hit you?"
"Yes, but afterwards - afterwards, he would wash me. I let him do what he
wanted with me because he would wash me and I wanted to feel clean, even if it
was just for a little while. I let him do it, Severus, I let him do it!"
"Ssh, Harry, you didn't. He was a grown man who abused you, you are not to
blame for this, Harry. You're not."
"Then why do I feel like it's my fault?"
"Because he conditioned you to think like that, that you'd done something wrong
and you were being punished, but it was him who was in the wrong, Harry, not
you. Did he - did he do anything else?"
"Severus, I'm sorry, I can't talk about this any more. Not tonight. Please."
Harry hung his head along by Severus' neck and clung to him, trembling and
sobbing, feeling all the shame, all the horror still clinging to him like the
dirt and the foul smells he had to endure growing up. "Please don't make me go
back there," he whispered hoarsely.
"Harry, you are never going to set foot in that awful house ever again, I
promise you that."
"Sorry," mumbled Harry as his tears dried on his cheeks. "I'm feeling a bit
fragile tonight."
"No wonder, you have nothing to apologise for, Harry. Don't ever apologise for
what he did to you. It's late, Harry, time we were both in bed I think."
"Severus - we - we can still share a bed can't we, even if we don't you know -
do anything? I don't want to be on my own."
"Then we'll have to spend a lot of time together, won't we?" smiled Severus
leaning down and giving him a soft kiss. Severus' kisses had never scared Harry
and he smiled at his lover.
"Definitely," he said wrapping his arms tight around Severus as he stood up and
carried Harry to bed.
 
Part Twenty Two
Severus lay awake for a long time after Harry had fallen asleep, their
conversation going round and round in his head. When Severus had agreed to
discipline Harry, he knew that he'd done it as some sort of revenge against the
boy's father, hurt him since he couldn't hurt James. Now, to discover the
extent of the abuse, had him feeling even more guilty for even laying a hand to
him at all.
Was Dumbledore right? Had Severus been abusing Harry? Harry didn't seem to
think so, but then he thought that the Dursleys abusing him had been his fault,
so could Harry's judgement be reliable in this? For Harry had told him time and
time again that he wanted to be punished, he needed to be punished sometimes.
Did this stem from his abusive childhood? And was it really in Harry's best
interests to continue to physically punish him sometimes?
Severus loved Harry and Harry was hurting, ergo Severus was hurting too.
Whatever hurt Harry, hurt him and he didn't know what they ought to be doing
for the best. He knew that if he ever saw Vernon Dursley again, the man would
wish he'd never been born. None of the Dursleys would get away with it. Severus
didn't know what he would do, he just knew he had to something.
Harry whimpered in his sleep and began mumbling, "No, please, no," as he tossed
and turned in the large bed. His forehead was beaded with sweat, despite the
coolness of the room.
Severus softly shook him awake. "Harry, you're having a nightmare." He could
almost imagine what it was about after Harry's revelations earlier that
evening.
Harry blinked and stared up at him, his eyes unfocused without his glasses.
"Sorry, didn't mean to disturb you," said Harry, almost on the verge of tears
again as he turned over. Severus cuddled up behind him and wrapped Harry in his
arms.
"You didn't disturb me, Harry. That wasn't why I woke you. I was just trying to
wake you up so you wouldn't continue having a bad dream. Do you want to tell me
about it? You don't have to, but sometimes it helps."
Harry nodded, but didn't turn to look at him. Maybe it was easier for him to
talk this way. "I was dreaming about the summer when I turned twelve. They gave
me Dudley's second bedroom when I came back from Hogwarts, I think they were
afraid that someone from the school had found out I was living in a cupboard.
They didn't care about me, only about what the neighbours would think if they
found out how I was treated."
Harry shuddered and Severus kissed the back of his neck to soothe him. Despite
the abuse, Harry was very welcome of any non-sexual touches and Severus was
determined to give him as many kisses and hugs as he wanted.
"Dobby was there the night Vernon was entertaining Mr. and Mrs. Mason, very
important clients. Well, when Dobby sent that dessert and it fell on top of
Mrs. Mason, you can imagine my relatives weren't very pleased with me.
Especially since I was out of my room and had let strangers see me in the
bedraggled clothes and my dirty face. I probably looked like a tramp or
something. When the Masons left, Vernon beat me so bad that I lay unconscious
for three or four days, I don't really know. Before I blacked out I thought he
was going to kill me and I half hoped he would, then I wouldn't have to put up
with it anymore." Harry sniffled a little, but he continued with his tale.
"A few days later, Petunia had taken Dudley shopping for his new school
supplies. Vernon took me out of my cupboard and made me take a shower. Then he
gave me some new clothes that almost fit. I was too surprised to question any
of it, but I should have realised that the clothes and the shower had a price."
"Oh, Harry, what happened?" Severus felt his heart lurch for that twelve year
old boy.
"He took me to a hotel where Mr. Mason was waiting for us and he led us up to
his room. I didn't know why I was there, or why Vernon had taken me out
somewhere at all, but I went Severus, I went with them. I sort of guessed later
what had happened. Mr. Mason had seen me and liked what he saw, he'd told
Vernon that Grunnings could have the contract if Vernon would do him a favour,
the favour being me."
"What did they do to you, Harry?"
"Mr. Mason wanted me to suck him off, I refused, so Vernon beat me again and
again until I was lying on the floor in agony, I was in no state to prevent it
when Mr. Mason straddled me and pushed his cock in my mouth. Vernon kept hold
of my hands so I couldn't even try to get him off me. After he - he finished,
it was Vernon's turn. He kept - he kept calling me boy," Harry said softly.
"That's why I couldn't - I couldn't - that night -" he hiccupped and could
hardly talk any more.
"I'm sorry, Harry. I never meant to make you uncomfortable. I'm glad you told
me now, though. I know now never to call you that, even if we're playing."
"Mr. Mason gave Vernon the contract, he also gave him some extra money and
Vernon thought it would be a good idea for all his business associates to have
a go at me. They never f - fucked me, he wouldn't let them, said he didn't want
to be raising a queer. It happened every summer, Severus. He would take me to
their houses, their hotels and I was beaten black and blue before the men used
me. Not one of them raised a finger to stop Vernon from hitting me, I think
that maybe it excited them. The men would go first, but Vernon would always
have a go afterwards as well. I didn't know how to make it stop." Harry turned,
muffling his sobs in the pillows. Severus let him cry it out, it was a good
cathartic and Merlin knew Harry needed that.
When Harry seemed calmer, Severus asked, "Did you never tell anyone, Harry? Was
there no-one who could help you?"
Harry turned over and Severus felt his heart catch when he saw Harry's tear
stained face. "I - I told Dumbledore," said Harry. "But he did nothing about
it, except offer me sweets and said people couldn't pick their relatives, but
they had to put up with them all the same."
"What? Harry, no child should have had to put up with what you went through.
Not one. He could have done something, the wards at the school could have
protected you as much as your mother's blood, you could have stayed there. He
could have stopped it, but he didn't."
"No, he didn't," said Harry, his voice sounding hollow. Severus could only
imagine how Harry felt at finally having the courage to tell someone what was
happening to him, hoping that they could make it stop, only they refused to
help. So Harry was left to deal with this on his own, as he'd been left to deal
with everything else. Severus knew what the headmaster was doing, hoping that
Harry would be made stronger by what he had to endure at the Dursleys'. But the
human mind and body could only take so much, even those of them who were
wizards. It was a wonder Harry hadn't ended up at St. Mungo's already.
"Do you really have a shop, Severus?" Harry asked then and Severus guessed he
didn't want to discuss his abuse any more tonight.
"I do, but you don't have to work in it, I only said that to shut Mrs. Jensen
up."
"No, I mean, I'd like to work in it with you, if you don't mind, that is."
"Of course I wouldn't mind, Harry. I'm finding it very hard to let you out of
my sight, I'll feel a lot better knowing you're safe nearby."
"What sort of shop is it?" asked Harry, propping himself up on one elbow.
"What do you think?" asked Severus, giving him a teasing smile.
Harry thought for a minute or two before answering. "Hmm, I can't imagine you
selling potions to the Muggles. Books maybe?"
"Almost right," said Severus. "Books and glass."
"Glass? What, windows and things?"
"We do small stained glass windows, but no, it's mostly bottles, vases,
decorative types of glass as well as goblets and such."
"So who looks after it when you're at Hogwarts? Sorry, when you were at
Hogwarts."
"I have a manager and three staff, they'll be a little surprised to see me
become a permanent fixture, but it is still my shop, so they'll just have to
get used to it, won't they?"
"Severus?"
"Yes, Harry?"
Harry wrapped his arms around Severus' waist and tucked his head under Severus'
chin. "Thank you. Thank you for everything."
***
Severus did finally manage to fall asleep later that night, but when he woke in
the morning, Harry's side of the bed was cold. Severus stumbled out of bed and
ran downstairs, his heart beating about a mile a minute, worried that Harry was
in danger. He heard noises from the kitchen, holding his wand in front of him,
Severus pushed the door open to find Harry merrily cooking away and he almost
laughed in relief.
Harry turned from the cooker and pouted. "You've ruined the surprise, I was
going to bring you breakfast in bed."
"Where did you get all the food?" asked Severus.
"I borrowed it from Mrs. Jensen, I told her we got in late and hadn't time to
go shopping yet and that I wanted to make my uncle a special breakfast since he
was so kind as to take me in."
"She let you?" asked Severus, the woman had never let him borrow so much as a
bowl of sugar.
"Well, a few stray tears might have helped," smirked Harry. "I'm well used to
playing the poor orphan, aren't I?" The smirk had gone, replaced by the hollow
look Harry had sported last night. Severus wrapped him in a hug, relieved when
Harry didn't push him away.
"Sorry about ruining your surprise, I was worried when you weren't in bed. I
thought you might have gone off to explore the cliffs or the beach."
"Not without you," said Harry. "I guessed it's only the house that's warded,
since we're in the middle of Muggleland."
"You guessed right. We can go exploring later, after the shopping if you like."
"I'd like that," said Harry as he disentangled himself from Severus' embrace in
order to save their scrambled eggs from burning. They ate their breakfast at
the small kitchen table, Harry was a wonderful cook but Severus didn't like to
think too much of where he'd learned that skill or how.
Not only were there scrambled eggs, there were pancakes, croissants, jam and
marmalade along with enough toast to feed a small army. Glasses of orange juice
and a pot of coffee sat in the middle of the table. As usual, Harry pecked at
his food like a bird and didn't eat much. Maybe he was still feeling full after
their large dinner the night before, Severus had never seen Harry eat so much
before.
Severus knew he wasn't used to eating a lot when the Dursleys had half starved
him most of the time, so he didn't comment on how little Harry was eating. He
knew it would take some time, but once Harry got used to food again he would be
able to get back to a normal diet and normal portions.
Starting today, Severus intended to ensure that Harry would have a normal life.
The normal life he should have had growing up.
And if it had to be a life among Muggles, then that was just a sacrifice they
were going to have to make.
 
Part Twenty Three
Harry was missing again when Ron woke up, he was getting used to his best
friend not being in the dorms at night, but it didn't dampen his curiosity one
bit. Where did Harry go at night? At first he thought Harry was receiving extra
training of some sort in order to defeat You-Know-Who, or he was in the Room of
Requirement as somewhere safe to protect him from the stalker, but Voldemort
was now defeated and Mr. Filch had died in Azkaban, so why was Harry still
missing from his bed at night? Did he go off on adventures without taking Ron?
Hearing the normal noises of his dorm mates as they surfaced, Ron climbed out
of bed and that's when he noticed something that he was sure hadn't happened
before, no matter how many nights Harry had gone missing. At the foot of
Harry's bed, there was an empty space where Harry's trunk used to be. Harry
wasn't just missing from his bed or the dorm, he was missing from the school.
Ron pulled on a dressing gown and dashed down the stairs and tried to climb the
stairs to the girls' dormitory, forgetting in his worry that boys weren't
allowed in. He slid to the bottom as the alarm sounded and a few girls peeped
over the banister at the top of the stairs which had turned into a slide to
prevent him from going any further.
"I need to see Hermione!" Ron called urgently and one of the second years went
to fetch her while the other girls stared at him and kept giggling behind their
hands.
"Ron? You know you're not supposed to be trying to get into the girls' dorms,"
said Hermione when she emerged and folded her arms over her chest.
"Never mind that, Hermione! It's Harry! He's missing!"
"But he's been missing every night for the past few weeks."
"His trunk's gone! And Hedwig!"
Hermione paled and called down to Ron to get dressed, that they needed to see
the headmaster. As Hermione left to get dressed herself, the common room fire
flickered emerald green and Ron saw his mother's head in the fire.
"Mum!" he exclaimed and bent over to her level.
"Ron, thank goodness! Harry's owl arrived this morning, but there was no note,
nothing. What's going on?"
"I don't know, Mum, but Harry's trunk is gone too. We're going to see the
headmaster, maybe he knows what's going on."
"Stand back, I'll come with you," said his mother. Ron stood back to give her
room to climb out of the fireplace. Harry's trunk gone and Hedwig without a
letter to explain anything? Things were worse than he thought.
***
Dumbledore eyed the students and Molly Weasley carefully. They all seemed
rather worried about Harry's disappearance, something he could use to his
advantage. "Are you sure there was no note, Molly? Nothing to explain where he
might have gone?" He didn't think any of them were lying about not knowing
Harry's whereabouts, but it never hurt to make sure, so he accessed Molly's
mind while she was speaking, to an outsider it would just look like he was
paying rapt attention. He was, but not to her words.
"No, headmaster, nothing. This isn't like Harry, to run away like this."
"No, it isn't," agreed Dumbledore, stroking this beard. "I don't think Harry
has run away at all. This is not to leave these rooms," he glared hard at the
two students who nodded frantically but Dumbledore knew they would not be able
to keep this knowledge to themselves. He was relying on it. "Harry did not run
away, I fear he was kidnapped by Professor Snape. He is also missing from his
rooms."
Ron rounded on Hermione. "I knew it! I knew he was up to something! I never
trusted him!"
"Severus? There must be some mistake," said Molly. "Severus was on our side,
wasn't he? He was always looking out for Harry, he always protected him!"
"That's what he led everyone to believe," said Dumbledore gravely. "He fooled
even me, I'm afraid I trusted where I should not have trusted. It appears that
Severus had been in league with the Dark Lord all along, it was he who brought
Harry to him a few days ago, it is only by Harry's own skill that he was able
to defeat the Dark Lord. I think Severus Confounded him, confused him as to
what Professor Snape's role in the Dark Lord's circle actually was, as Harry
did not even realise that he had been betrayed. He did not seem to know that
Severus Snape was the reason he was taken to the Dark Lord in the first place."
"No, I can't believe it," said Hermione Granger. "Professor Snape would never
hurt Harry, he wouldn't."
"That's what I thought too, Miss Granger, but recently I have discovered that
Professor Snape had been abusing his power as a teacher in this school in order
to do just that." Dumbledore rose from the table and removed his pensieve from
the glass fronted cabinet. "When Harry was being stalked, he came to me,
worried that Professor Snape might have been the one who was doing all this to
him. He kindly allowed me access to his memories of his detentions with
Professor Snape." It was a blatant lie of course, Harry had allowed no such
thing, but Dumbledore wasn't an Occlumens for nothing. He removed the memories
without Harry's knowledge or consent, and he had no qualms about showing them
to his intended audience.
People should really be more careful about accepting his sweets. Not once had
anyone realised they were charmed. The sweets themselves would remove a
person's memories and the wrappers would store them, ready for Dumbledore to
access at leisure. It was how he knew so much about what was going on in
Hogwarts, he had no need of invisibility cloaks or potions.
It couldn't have worked out better really. Molly would be livid, he knew how
much she cared for Harry and to see what Severus had done to him would get her
riled up like nothing else would. Even Miss Granger would be convinced of
Snape's guilt, once they'd seen the memories of Harry being spanked, he would
deliberately leave off the cuddling afterwards. There was no need for any of
them to see that. They would see what he intended them to see. A teacher
abusing his power in regards to a student, something he knew none of them would
be able to forgive. The news would be round the school in hours and it would
only be a matter of time before Molly contacted Arthur and via him the Aurors
would be searching for them by the next day at the latest.
Dumbledore held out his hands towards the rune carved bowl. "If you would."
***
Hermione could hardly face breakfast after what she'd seen in the pensieve. Ron
was munching his way through toast and cereal, after having told almost half of
the Gryffindor table what he'd seen Snape do to Harry.
"I don't believe it!" exclaimed Neville when Ron told the other boys in sixth
year.
"Why not? It's just like him," said Ron. "We all knew Snape was evil, this just
proves it."
"Are you sure, Ron? It just doesn't sound like Snape, mate," said Dean.
"What do you mean it doesn't sound like him? Of course it does! He's always had
it in for Harry, hasn't he? Dumbledore showed us the pensieve, didn't he
Hermione?" Ron turned her, as if to garner her support. She couldn't give it,
something just wasn't right.
"I don't know, Ron, something about those memories is wrong."
"Er, from what you've said Ron, it doesn't sound like detention to me," said
Seamus.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, um, some people like to be punished - um - you know, as part of sex or
foreplay."
"What?" screeched Ron so loudly that the whole Hall was looking at the
Gryffindor table. "Are you saying Harry's some sort of pervert? Well, he isn't!
Harry wasn't having sex with Snape!"
But Hermione was suddenly having her doubts about that. It made a lot more
sense that Harry was enduring these punishments as some sort of sexual fetish,
and maybe Snape was the only one he could trust with it. He would be afraid of
telling Ron because he would get the reaction Ron had just given and probably
didn't want to discuss it with a girl. The kneeling on the floor, the
spankings, the caning.
The caning. There was something wrong with that, Hermione knew, but she
couldn't quite put her finger on it. In the pensieve, Harry had been spanked
with his clothes still on, but for the caning, his trousers and underwear had
been around his ankles as he'd been bent over Snape's desk. Hermione hadn't
wanted to look at her friend like that, it felt like such a violation when he
didn't know about it and then she knew what was wrong.
"Ron, didn't you tell me once that Harry had a birthmark on his left hip?"
"Yeah, a mole about the size of a sickle, why?"
"Because in that memory we saw about Harry being caned, there was no mole.
Dumbledore manipulated those memories, who's to say he didn't manipulate all of
them?"
"But why? Why would he do that?"
"I don't know, but I am not going to accept those pensieve memories as proof
that Professor Snape did something to Harry. Something else is going on here
and I'm determined to find out what it is. "
It was rather unfortunate for Hermione that Dumbledore happened to walk past
their table just then and heard every word.
 
Part Twenty Four
Harry had been working at Severus' shop for three weeks and the pre Christmas
rush had really started in earnest. The manager, Mr. Thompson had been a bit
wary at first at having Harry work there, thinking that he wouldn't be up to
the task and had only got the job because he was Severus' nephew. However,
after seeing how much of a hard worker Harry was, they both got on fine after
that and the two sales assistants, Linda and Amelia soon made friends with
Harry too. He thought Amelia might have had a bit of a crush on him, so he
tried to avoid being alone with her whenever possible.
He'd written to Hermione's parents, the Grangers via Muggle post a few days
after they'd arrived in Cornwall as Hedwig hadn't come to find him. She still
hadn't and Harry was a little worried, Hedwig had always managed to find him
before, no matter where he might be. He hoped she hadn't had an accident or
something. He and Severus both thought Muggle post was the best way to send any
letters as neither of them trusted any owl other than Hedwig. Severus never had
an owl of his own, he'd always used the school owls or those from the post
office in Hogsmeade and Harry just hoped the Grangers would be able to contact
Hermione somehow and let her know that he was okay.
Harry groaned as he bent down to unpack the latest selection of books ready to
be shelved. He was looking forward to a nice long bath when he got home. It was
hard work, but he never complained, working so hard meant that he had less time
to think and exhaustion worked even better than Dreamless Sleep to stop him
having nightmares.
Severus worked mostly in the glass department, Harry hadn't known it, but a lot
of the items the shop sold were actually created by Severus himself, he was a
talented glass maker, and Harry worked in books. They didn't often see each
other during the day except at lunch time or when there was a lull in the
shoppers, but that didn't look to be happening any time soon. It was little
over a week to Christmas and they hadn't had a lull since the end of November.
Mr. Thompson peeked his head round the stockroom door. "Harry, can you serve on
the shop floor for a while, please? It's a madhouse out here. I'll get those
books sorted out tonight."
"Yes, Mr. Thompson," said Harry, setting the books he'd done on the out shelf
and leaving the rest in the boxes so whoever was doing the inventory next would
know where to start. Each of them did a bit of everything, serving customers,
unpacking stock, ordering new books, managing the electronic tills. Harry loved
it. Not many people knew that he was as much of a bookworm as Hermione. Books
were the only things that Dudley had never broken so when Harry got hold of
Dudley's books, they were new. He knew nearly all their stock off by heart now
and whatever he didn't, he could ask Severus or any of the others, they were
always keen to help him.
Harry washed his hands, the stockroom was rather dusty, and entered the main
shop. The place was packed, so many customers that it was hard to make out
individuals, they were almost like one entity, a crush of humanity with only
one thing on their mind. Making a sales assistant's life hell.
Someone was haranguing Amelia and the poor girl looked as if she was about to
burst into tears.
"What do you mean you don't have it? This is the last shop! You've got to have
it!"
Harry was about to go over and rescue Amelia when he heard the man speaking. A
voice he recognised and wished he hadn't. Cold sweat trickled down his back and
his hands were clammy. Harry seemed rooted to the spot for a few minutes and
then hurriedly walked upstairs to the glass department and Severus. He needed
to get to Severus.
"Harry? Where are you going?" demanded Mr. Thompson and that's when it
happened. Vernon Dursley looked up towards the staircase and grinned
maliciously at his nephew. Harry wasn't quick enough. Vernon charged up the
stairs behind him and yanked Harry's arm.
Mr. Thompson called after them both. "Hey! What do you think you're doing?
Assaults on my staff will not be tolerated!"
Vernon glared at the manager and tugged Harry towards him. It was no use, Harry
knew Severus couldn't help him now. "So this is where you're hiding, is it
boy?" he sneered and Harry could smell sour beer on his breath, the man was
half drunk. "We keep getting letters from that freaky school of yours. Won't
they be interested to know where you've been all this time?"
No. No-one at the school could know, for that would mean Dumbledore would know.
"I'm sorry sir," said Harry as politely as he could manage, even though the
words almost stuck in his throat. He didn't want to be polite, he wanted to
punch Vernon for all that he'd put Harry through over the years but knew that
would make his uncle realise who he was. "I think you must have mistaken me for
someone else."
Vernon did look a little confused, glancing from Harry to Mr. Thompson and back
again. Now that Harry was eating properly, he was not the scrawny brat Vernon
would remember, his glasses and hairstyle were different too and he had clothes
that fitted properly, the black trousers and white uniform shirt with
Fletcher's embroidered in black thread over the breast pocket. He was no longer
the orphaned waif, but Vernon did not seem convinced.
"What is going on?" demanded Mr. Thompson. "Please unhand my staff at once." He
put one foot on the bottom step.
"This boy is my nephew, Harry Potter. He ran away."
"No, you've made a mistake," said Harry. "My name is Harry Fletcher, my uncle
owns this shop. Shall I fetch him?"
Vernon didn't let go of Harry's arm and bellowed down to Mr. Thompson. "You
fetch him," he snarled. "I'm not letting this one out of my sight."
All the other customers and staff in the shop were keenly watching the tableau
on the stairs and Harry hoped Severus would be able to do something, even if he
had to resort to magic to do it. Mr. Thompson gave Harry a worried look as he
passed the two of them on his way to the glass department.
A few moments later, Severus appeared on the stairs like the Angel of Vengeance
come swooping down and Harry almost sagged with relief when he saw him.
Standing on the top of the stairs, he towered over Vernon, but it just wasn't
that he had extra height, he had the presence that Harry now realised was his
wizarding power, but Vernon being a Muggle had no inkling of it. All he saw was
a rather tall, imposing figure and Harry felt the older man shudder.
"Sir? I would ask you to release my nephew or I will have no choice but to call
the police. Violence of any sort against my staff is not tolerated."
"Your nephew?" asked Vernon. "He can't be your nephew, Lily had no other
relatives and neither did Potter. We are the boy's only family."
"There must be some mistake," said Severus. "Perhaps you'd care to discuss it
in my office?"
Vernon nodded but before he followed Severus up the stairs, he pushed Harry's
fringe away from his forehead and gaped at him. "Scar. You have no scar," he
mumbled and let go of Harry's arm.
"My office, Mr. ...?"
"Dursley. Vernon Dursley."
"This way, Mr. Dursley," said Severus, smiling as he led Vernon away and Harry
got back to work.
"Harry? Are you okay?" asked Mr. Thompson. "What an obnoxious man! Would you
like to go back to the stockroom instead?"
"No, thank you, Mr. Thompson. I'm fine." Harry smiled to show that he was okay.
"I'm just glad he's not my real uncle."
"Thank goodness, imagine!" exclaimed Mr. Thompson and walked back to the till.
Harry wondered what Severus would do to his uncle. From what he knew of Severus
and how protective he was of Harry, he knew that Vernon's time in that office
would not be pleasant.
***
Vernon Dursley was panting from the little exertion of walking up the stairs
and he collapsed in a chair by Severus' desk even before he was invited to.
"So you're Vernon Dursley," Severus said quietly once he'd locked and warded
the door. Severus removed his wand and slowly wandered around until he was
facing the man who was responsible for a lot of Harry's demons.
Vernon saw the wand, his eyes widened in fear as he tried to extricate himself
from the chair, but Severus' binding spell soon prevented that. "You're one of
them freaks! I'll scream!" Dursley threatened.
"Go ahead, it won't help you. No-one will be able to hear. And I think, Dursley
that you're the one who's the freak, abusing a six year old boy? I hear that
Muggle prisons have to separate molesters and rapists from the other prisoners,
for their own safety. Even Muggles can't abide people like you." Severus tapped
his wand against his chin as though thinking and prowled around the chair,
hearing the man whimper. He stank of stale sweat and fear, wondering what
Severus was going to do to him.
And then Severus knew what would be the perfect revenge. He smiled ferally and
Dursley wet his trousers.
***
Harry sighed as he relaxed in the bubbles, washing the aches and the worries of
the day away. He hadn't seen Vernon leave, but Severus had whispered to him at
lunch that Vernon would never bother him again. Harry never doubted it. He
didn't ask what Severus had done, but maybe one day he would.
The water was beginning to get cold and Harry's skin was becoming more prune
like the longer he stayed. He thought about adding some more hot water, but
realised it was probably time to get out anyway and then realised his mistake.
"Severus," he called through the open door to their bedroom. "I forgot to bring
in some towels." Harry had left the bathroom door open every night, almost as
an invitation, but Severus had yet to take him up on it. Ever since Filch's
attack, Severus had done nothing more than kiss and hug him, even though plenty
of times Harry had felt the man's arousal against him when they cuddled up in
bed.
Was he afraid to initiate anything with Harry now? Or was it that he didn't
want to make love to someone who was so damaged? Harry's libido had certainly
decreased ever since the castration, but it wasn't non-existent and he wanted
Severus to make love to him, but Severus seemed frightened of touching him in
any way that could be construed as sexual. He only ever wrapped his arms around
Harry's waist, no lower and his kisses were brief, far too brief in Harry's
opinion. Did Severus think he was no longer a sexual being because of what
happened?
A few moments later, Severus entered the bathroom with a small pile of green
fluffy towels. He was about to put them down on the chair and leave, when
Harry's hand shot out and grabbed Severus' wrist. "No, stay, please," Harry
begged. Harry realised that apart from that brief glimpse in the infirmary,
Severus had never actually seen him completely naked as he was now, he'd never
touched his body like this either.
"What are you scared of, Severus?" Harry asked softly as he sat up in the
water, suds clinging to his skin. Severus' eyes seemed to be drawn to the
bubbly skin and lower still, where the rest of Harry was hidden by the water.
"Do you want to see me?" asked Harry, his heart suddenly feeling far too big
for his chest.
"Yes - no, not if it upsets you," Severus amended quickly.
"It won't," said Harry. "I want you to look at me, Severus. I want you to touch
me, I'm not going to break. I'm not a piece of glass anymore. They shattered
me, Severus. All those men, Vernon, Filch, Dumbledore, but you remade me,
stronger, tougher than before."
Harry leaned up in the bath, resting his elbows on the edge and stood up as the
water flowed from his skin. To his credit, he didn't blush or shy away from
Severus' scrutiny of him. He wanted this, he needed this and the look of
adoration on Severus face as his eyes travelled from top to toe had Harry's
groin stirring, slower than before, but he knew they had all the time in the
world. Tonight was not a night to be rushed.
Severus lifted one of the towels and wrapped Harry in it.
"I want to shatter you," whispered Severus hoarsely, close to his ear and Harry
shivered.
"You're the only one I'll ever allow to break me," agreed Harry, nodding his
head and leaning down for a lingering kiss.
 
Part Twenty Five
Severus dried Harry swiftly but gently with the towels, Severus kneeling on the
floor in front of Harry like he was worshipping him. Severus bent forward and
kissed the mole on Harry's left hip. Harry was enjoying being worshipped, for
Severus was a very conscientious devotee. Harry was being worshipped by lips
and fingers, there was hardly a part of him Severus did not touch. Severus
stared up at him as his mouth hovered just a few inches from Harry's erection.
Severus' eyes were hooded and dark with lust, Harry could feel his own body
respond with just that intent gaze.
"Harry, what do you want?" Severus' voice was as shaky as Harry was feeling at
that moment.
"Please... please... touch me," pleaded Harry, wondering how he could bear
feeling like this for much longer. His whole body felt as if he was engulfed in
fire, yet he was shivering from the water cooling on his skin. Severus gave him
one last heated look before taking the tip of Harry's cock in his mouth and
suckling it as though he was a baby nursing. Harry had never felt such bliss
and his hands reached out almost of their own accord to tangle themselves in
Severus' ebony locks as he lost himself to the sensations.
Hot, wet heat, the hint of teeth and tongue that licked and pressed in all the
right places. Harry felt the orgasm build and build, but where before his
strongest sensations would have been in his balls and the base of his cock,
this felt different, almost as if his whole body was coming. His thighs
trembled, his heart seemed to expand in his chest, his every atom seemed
attuned to the pleasure Severus was giving him. "OH! Severus! Severus!" Harry
screamed as the feelings overwhelmed him and he bucked his hips into Severus'
mouth, no longer able to control the urge as he came and came, completely dry
but so intense a sensation that he almost passed out from the ecstasy of it.
Severus was gripping his hips, supporting him, holding him through the tremors
and aftershocks. Harry was glad, he didn't think he would be able to stand
under his own steam for quite some time yet. Severus released his prick with a
soft pop and the predatory grin Harry was gifted with had his legs wobbling
like he'd just been hit with the world's strongest jelly-legs hex.
"I think we'd be more comfortable in bed, don't you?" Severus asked while still
kneeling in front of Harry. Harry could only nod, words were beyond him by this
point. He just knew he wanted more of Severus' magic hands and mouth on his
body. Severus discarded the towels, then stood up and scooped Harry up in his
arms as if Harry weighed no more than a snitch. Harry wrapped his legs around
Severus waist and pressed his lips eagerly against those of his lover, loving
the swooping sensation low down in his stomach as Severus carried him over to
the bed. Still kissing him, Severus set him down on the bed, pressing their
bodies together and Harry could feel the evidence of the man's desire digging
into his stomach.
Harry arched his hips as he felt himself quicken again, the arousal more like a
slow burning ember rather than an inferno this time, but an arousal all the
same. Severus was still fully clothed in his black trousers and white shirt.
Harry shuffled his hands between them and began tugging haphazardly at buttons,
wanting to get them both skin to skin as soon as possible. He moaned into their
kiss as he came across a rather stubborn collar button. Severus must have taken
pity on him then, for he broke their kiss and groaned a spell that had him
naked in moments. All that bare flesh against his own had Harry writhing on the
bed and tugging Severus down for more passionate kisses.
Harry couldn't get enough of the man's mouth, lips thin but soft, the minty
flavour of their toothpaste and a stronger, spicier taste that was unique to
Severus. Harry thrust his tongue into Severus' mouth and was rewarded when
Severus returned the favour and then it was a duel of flesh against flesh,
teeth against teeth and lips against lips.
"Please!" Harry pulled away quick enough to gasp out, needing Severus now more
than ever.
"Please what, Harry? What do you want?" Severus' voice was soft and low
dripping like liquid chocolate on his skin, Harry bucked and moaned, feeling
harder than he'd ever been in his life. "What do you want, Harry?" Severus
asked again, thrusting his hips in a ragged rhythm of his own.
"Fix me, Severus. Put me back together again. Complete me," said Harry, kissing
the man above him.
"Harry, gods, Harry I want to do that. We should have planned this better, I
could have brewed some lube. I don't want your first time to hurt. Maybe we
should wait."
"Aren't there spells you could use?" asked Harry, trying to hide his
disappointment. He wanted Severus inside him, he felt so empty and he knew that
only Severus could fill the void in his heart and soul.
"There are, but it isn't as personal. I want to do it, Harry. I want to feel
you clenching around my fingers as I prepare you. I want to hear you moan out
in lust as you feel each finger stretching you."
"Oh God!" moaned Harry, and it was almost as if he could feel what Severus was
describing, it felt like there were fingers inside him, stretching him,
preparing him. "I want that, Severus. I want to feel you inside me."
"You will, Harry. Just not tonight, but there are other things we could do.
Roll over onto your stomach."
"Other things?" queried Harry, but turning over all the same, trusting Severus
as he'd trusted no-one else in his life.
He settled his arms underneath the pillow, resting his head and wondered what
Severus was going to do. His prick was hard and pressing against the mattress,
causing Harry to moan and slide up and down a little on the sheets in order to
get more friction, before Severus stopped him with firm hands on his hips. "Not
yet, Harry. I don't want you to come yet. Be patient."
Harry giggled as he felt Severus' breath tickling the back of his neck. "So
sensitive, my Harry," whispered Severus and he bent down and kissed Harry
there. Harry sighed, My Harry, he loved it when Severus called him that,
feeling that he was wanted, that he belonged to someone. For so long he hadn't
belonged to anyone.
Severus began trailing kisses all along his neck and shoulder blades, then
kissing and nibbling his way down Harry's spine. "Severus!" Harry clutched the
pillow in his hands as Severus did his best to turn Harry into a puddle of goo
on the bed. "Please! Oh, Please!"
"I love it when you beg," said Severus softly and Harry could feel the man's
lips close to his buttocks, but not touching him just yet. Harry didn't think
he could bear it and if Severus wanted to hear him beg, then he would gladly
oblige. He could feel his bottom clenching as he imagined Severus staring at
him back there, the place no-one had ever touched before.
"Please, Severus! Please!" Harry begged, although he wasn't entirely sure what
for. He just knew he wanted - something. He shrieked and bucked up when
Severus' tongue licked from the small of his back to his cleft. Oh, God, Harry
had never even imagined anything like that. Who knew that would feel so bloody
good? And it got even better. Severus' tongue teased him, tickled him with soft
flutters at his entrance and then oh God, his tongue pushed past the ring of
guardian muscles and suddenly Harry was being speared by that talented tongue
and he howled against the pillow as his cock hardened further beneath him.
"AHHH!" exclaimed Harry, arching his hips as Severus' tongue continued its
wonderful ministrations. If he'd thought having the man's mouth on his cock was
bliss, then he had no words to describe this. He was thrusting back onto
Severus' tongue and down against the mattress in a rocking rhythm. Severus was
inside him. Inside him. God, Severus was inside him, inside him, inside him and
... "OH! OHHH! OHHH!" groaned Harry, almost tearing the pillow as his second
orgasm of the night roared through him. He saw stars behind his closed eyelids,
orange and red blurs as he arched back against Severus and kept waiting for the
tremors to pass. They didn't, it was too intense, just too much and Harry
passed out, flopping loosely on the bed.
***
Severus padded to the kitchen to get Harry a glass of cold water, once he came
round again. Harry's hands were shaking so much that quite a bit of the water
sloshed onto the quilt before he managed to get it to his mouth.
"Thanks," said Harry after he'd taken a sip of the liquid and set the glass
down on the bedside cabinet.
"Harry? Are you all right?" asked Severus sitting down on the bed and wrapping
Harry in a firm hug. Had he rushed things, rushed Harry into this when he
wasn't really ready? Had Vernon's visit to the shop that day affected Harry
more than he was letting on?
"I'm fine now, Severus. It was just so intense. I felt like I was floating on
the ceiling or something. I didn't know people - you know did that," Harry
blushed and Severus was delighted to see it. It was just the intensity of
something new, nothing to do with Harry's abuse at all.
"Did you like it?"
"Like it? Good grief, how you can ask that? You made me faint," chuckled Harry.
"It was brilliant!"
"Good, we'll have to try it again sometime then."
"What about you, Severus?" asked Harry, reaching over and caressing Severus'
now soft and fully spent cock.
Now it was Severus' turn to blush. "I came already, Harry, just before you
passed out. It wasn't just intense for you."
"Oh God, Severus, that's so hot," breathed Harry. "I made you come?"
"You did indeed." Severus smiled down at him. "You're really okay, Harry?" He
didn't need to mention Vernon, they both knew what he was referring to.
"I'm with the man I love, Severus. I'm more than okay, I'm perfect."
 
Part Twenty Six
The weeks and months passed quietly enough, so that for brief stretches of time
they both forgot that they were being hunted, that they were supposed to be in
hiding. It was Harry's seventeenth birthday that broke Severus' resolve, he
could hardly bear to deny the boy anything these days and Harry had only one
request.
He wanted to see his friends again and Severus foolishly allowed it. It had
taken weeks of planning, with letters going from Harry to the Grangers and then
onto Hogwarts from there. The meeting was arranged to be held in a small café
near to the shop, as Severus fully intended to be there as soon as his own shop
closed. He was short with the customers and the rest of his staff, but they
were used to his moods and it didn't prevent any of them from doing their jobs.
As soon as the last customer had left, Severus ducked out of Fletcher's,
leaving Thompson to lock up, and ran down the street to the café. The doors
were shut fast and Severus rattled them in their frames, hissing in
frustration. Harry was nowhere in sight and neither were the two Gryffindors.
Surely the boy hadn't been so foolish as to wander off somewhere else?
Harry knew Severus was going to join them later, but in that case, why was the
café shut? They normally stayed open until nine in the summer, catering to all
the tourists who frequented the small seaside town. Where would they have gone?
Severus knew Harry wouldn't take his friends back to their cottage, they both
knew that only secrecy could save them.
The harbour? The small beach? Severus starting walking down the hill to the
harbour and met a dazed and blood splattered Ronald Weasley coming back up.
"Sir!" he called increasing his strides and catching up with Severus
surprisingly quickly. The redhead had shot up so much in height, he was on a
level with Severus now.
"Sir, it's Hermione! She hexed me and Harry and Apparated away with Harry!
She's not herself."
Indeed not, Severus suspected she'd been under Imperio from Dumbledore. It
would be just like him to use Harry's friends rather than the Aurors to track
them down. There was nothing else for it, he was going to have to do what he'd
promised himself he would never do again.
He was going back to Hogwarts.
***
Harry didn't know where he was when he woke up, but he knew he was lying down
and that he was bound to the surface he was lying on. It was hard beneath him,
not a bed and he pulled at his restraints in frustration. He couldn't believe
it. Hermione had betrayed him. He had been so looking forward to seeing his
friends again, not once had he suspected that either of them might have been
under the Imperius curse and especially not Hermione. He thought she would have
been able to throw it off, but perhaps Dumbledore was even more powerful than
he and Severus had ever imagined.
Almost as if by thinking of the man, he was there glaring down at Harry over
his half moon glasses. The headmaster was the only thing Harry could see in the
room, almost as if the light was coming from within the wizard himself.
"Professor Dumbledore, please," gasped Harry as he struggled anew, but that
only seemed to make the bindings tighten their hold on him. "Why are you doing
this?"
"Why indeed, Harry? First, I think, I have to correct the small misapprehension
you are under. I am not, nor have I ever been Albus Dumbledore. Albus
Dumbledore is dead, killed by me over fifty years ago."
"You're - you're Grindelwald?" Harry felt his heart shatter. From all the
rumours, an even worse Dark Wizard than Voldemort. Harry tried to use a
wandless spell to release the ropes holding him, but it didn't work.
"Sorry, Harry. We're in the Room of Requirement and it will only meet my
requirements today, no magic for you, I'm afraid. But yes, you are correct, I
am Grindelwald. I defeated Dumbledore all those years ago. I knew that I would
only continue to be hunted if people knew I was still alive, so I cast a
glamour over both of us, when the Aurors came for the body, it looked like
Grindelwald and I was heralded as the hero of the hour for defeating him. It
was really too easy to fool them. People believed what they wanted to believe."
The man sighed, waved his hands and a soft blue glow illuminated the room, it
now looked like some sort of cavern, carved out of rock.
"Voldemort was one of my protégés you know, I was the Defence teacher when he
was at school here, shortly before I defeated Dumbledore, but Voldemort wanted
to surpass his master. No-one supplants me," he hissed, "I was glad when I
heard that a baby had defeated him, but then I heard that you had survived too,
with a curse scar on your forehead. The whole wizarding world was clamouring to
adopt you, but I couldn't allow that to happen, you couldn't be brought up as a
wizard, for I knew if you were, you would become powerful enough to challenge
me. Rather fortunate for me you had relatives who hated magic, I was sure they
would beat it out of you." The man paused and stroked his beard, or rather
Dumbledore's beard.
"You knew?" gasped Harry. "You knew what they'd done?"
"Of course I did, I had hoped they would convince you that magic never existed,
that you did not have power. I did not need another powerful wizard in my way."
"It didn't work then," replied Harry.
"No, for you defeated him again. I was so disappointed that you survived,
Harry, I wanted no-one to stand in my way as I aimed for the Minister's
position, reluctantly of course so they wouldn't be suspicious, but as soon as
I gained office, my true self would be revealed and I could rule the wizarding
world how I wanted and they couldn't do a bloody thing about it because they'd
elected me themselves. They would be the instruments of their own destruction.
Of course, I don't want to destroy everyone, where's the fun in that? I want
people to obey me and only obey me. Those who don't, well I will have no
choice."
"Too bad you destroyed the Philosopher's Stone," spat Harry. "Then you could
have continued your reign forever, couldn't you?"
"Who said it was destroyed, Harry?"
"You - you told me, in the hospital wing."
"Ah, blind trust is such an interesting concept in the youth of today. I've had
fifty years of teaching young wizards and witches, Harry. It'll only be a
matter of time before they pressure me into accepting the Minister's position
again and this time I think I might take it. The Stone was never destroyed,
Harry. I was just biding my time. You see, normally the Elixir of Life has to
be drunk constantly in order to confer immortality, but there is another way,
where it only needs to be drunk once and immortality is given to the drinker.
That's where you come in, my young friend and I have Argus Filch to thank. I
went to see him in Azkaban before he died and he told me what he'd done to you.
The fates were once again on my side, I could hardly believe it. Not only had
you defeated Voldemort, thanks for that by the way, I didn't need him ruining
my plans, but you are now exactly what I need. You see, I need to add something
to the Elixir. Blood of a virgin, a virgin eunuch to be precise.
"They are so hard to find these days, it's fallen out of fashion to castrate
the young."
"You're mad!" screamed Harry.
"No, I'm not mad. I know precisely what I'm doing. For example, for this spell
to work, you have to be a willing sacrifice. You have to allow me to kill you."
"Well then, it will never work for I won't go willingly!"
"Are you so sure about that, Harry?" Grindelwald turned, waving his arms again
and suddenly Hermione appeared out of thin air, suspended about thirty feet
above the floor. "You either agree or I will drop her and smash her head open
on the stones below."
Oh, God, the bastard knew that Harry could never put his friends in danger.
"Let her go!" he wriggled against the ropes.
"Not until you agree to be a willing sacrifice." Hermione fell a few feet and
Harry's heart shot into his throat.
"Hermione! I can't let him kill you!"
"Harry! Don't listen to him! It's a trick! He'll only kill me anyway after he's
done the spell! Don't do it! Don't agree!"
Harry couldn't do it. He couldn't let Grindelwald kill Hermione, nor could he
agree to be the willing victim, for to do so would be to condemn the rest of
the wizarding world to their fate and Harry could do neither.
"I'm waiting, Harry," snapped Grindelwald as he lowered Hermione another few
feet and Hermione's face turned pale with terror, but she refused to beg for
her life.
"Then you'll be waiting a long time, for I won't do it. I will never agree to
be your victim, never! AVADA KEDAVRA!" Harry screamed, not even sure it would
work, but he had to try. The man toppled the floor with a loud thunk like a
tree being felled, but as soon as he did, Hermione began to fall at an alarming
rate and Harry's quick levitation spell was the only thing that saved her.
"Harry! Thank God you're all right!" she sobbed as she was lowered gently to
the floor.
"I have to concur with Miss Granger, Harry," agreed Severus as he Apparated
into the room along with about thirty Aurors. Harry stared hard at the face of
his lover and could hardly believe he was here. Maybe he was the one going mad
and was dreaming of his rescue.
"How?" gasped Harry.
"Questions later, Harry. Rescue now." Severus and Kingsley Shacklebolt cast a
reveal spell on Dumbledore's prone form and Shacklebolt whistled his surprise.
"Well, I'll be, it is Grindelwald. Had us all fooled. Not any more. Take him to
the cemetery outside Azkaban," he ordered the Aurors as Severus loosened
Harry's bindings with a spell. Harry sat up and rubbed his chafed wrists, still
feeling a little out of it. Severus was here. Severus was here.
The Aurors bound Grindelwald's body with ropes and containment spells before
they Apparated him away.
"Harry, Hermione, are you both okay?" asked Kingsley.
They both nodded, but Severus was having none of that. "You are both going to
see Madam Pomfrey. No arguments," he glowered at both of them.
"Yes, sir," they said, before bursting into giggles and hugging each other.
 
Part Twenty Seven
"You wanted to see me, Minerva?" asked Severus as he hovered by her office
door. The decor was a little too tartan for his taste, but he was glad that she
hadn't seen the need to go to the headmaster's office yet, even though Minerva
McGonagall was now the new headmistress of Hogwarts and was entitled to use the
Head's office.
"Yes, Severus. Do come in."
Severus entered, closing the door behind him and took a seat by her desk,
reminding him uncomfortably of being sent to her office for plenty of
detentions when he was a student.
"How are Harry and Hermione doing?" she asked.
"Miss Granger is quite recovered from the Imperius, her parents are coming to
take her home today."
"And Harry?"
"Poppy wants to keep him in the infirmary a bit longer, she's worried he might
have become addicted to Dark magic, that was the second Killing Curse he cast
within a year, it can't be good for him and he probably won't even realise
until it's too late that it's happened."
"And what about the two of you, Severus? What are your plans where Harry is
concerned?"
"I'm not sure I understand the question, Minerva."
"Severus, I may be old, but I am not blind nor stupid. You and Harry are in a
relationship, anyone can see that so I ask you again, what are your intentions
towards the boy? Is this some sort of fling, are you having a mid-life crisis?
And will Harry end up being hurt because of it? I'm worried about both of you,
Severus. What if Harry wants someone younger in the future, how will you feel
then? Or what if you get tired of him?"
"I won't and neither will he. Do you think I would have run away with him,
thrown away my career because of a fling? Then you don't know me as well as you
thought."
"So what are you saying, Severus?"
"That I love him and we are never going to be parted, that's what I'm saying,
Minerva. Do you think we entered into this relationship lightly? We've been
through too much together and no-one is going to part us. Harry is of age now
and I am no longer his teacher."
"About that," said Minerva. "I wanted to offer you the Defence Against the Dark
Arts position, Severus."
"I don't think that would be very wise, Minerva. Why do you think Dum-
Grindelwald never offered it to me in the first place?"
"I don't know, he never confided in me."
"Because I was and always be an addict of Dark magic, I would rather stay away
from temptation if you don't mind, Minerva. I will have to use some Dark spells
in order to teach that course and it will only be too easy to fall back into
bad habits. I cannot accept."
"Oh, I see. Thank you for telling me, Severus. Do you know if Harry wishes to
return to school in September?"
"I don't know, I will have to ask him."
***
The shakes were bad today and Harry had to force himself not to speak in case
he cast any Dark spells. It didn't help that they'd taken away his wand, he was
so good at wandless magic now that it was even easier to cast a spell than it
had been with a wand. He was having hot and cold flushes as well as bouts of
nausea that had him heaving over the side of the bed. Severus had warned him
that Dark magic was addictive, but he hadn't really believed it.
He believed it now. The want was there, the power was there, all he had to do
was reach out and grab it and it was with sheer force of will that he didn't.
He didn't want to become a Dark wizard, he didn't want to hurt people, but the
truth remained that he had. He had killed twice. He was a murderer and he was
being hailed as some sort of hero.
Madam Pomfrey had already chased away about fifty reporters who'd somehow
managed to gain entry to the castle, the wards were a bit erratic at the
moment. Harry had wanted to curse all of them, it would have been so easy but
he resisted, knowing how disappointed Severus would be if he gave in.
Almost as soon as he thought of him, Severus was there, wrapping Harry in a hug
even before he greeted him. Harry sobbed on his shoulder with relief. It was a
lot easier to resist the call of Dark magic when Severus was with him. Severus
had gone through this too and Severus had beaten it, Harry could do that. He
could do it for Severus.
"How are you feeling, Harry?" Severus asked once Harry had calmed down and his
tears had dried to a trickle.
"Not too good," he admitted.
"It'll get better soon, Harry. I promise. I know it seems like you'll feel like
this forever, but you won't."
"It's so hard, Severus. I can feel it there, the Dark power in me and I want to
use, I ache to use it."
"I know, Harry, I know," Severus kissed his forehead.
"Severus, there's something I haven't told you. About Grindelwald."
Harry could feel the tension in Severus' body as soon as he said the words.
"Harry, what did he do to you?"
"Not to me, to you, Severus. He made you join the Death Eaters."
"He may have done many things, Harry, but he didn't make me do that. I'm afraid
I joined the Death Eaters of my own free will."
"No you didn't," insisted Harry. "He encouraged the marauders to play all those
pranks on you and prevented the other students from getting too close to you.
He wanted you alone and friendless, ready to accept Voldemort's offer of
friendship and belonging, but to make sure, he put you under Imperius to join
him. He wanted you as a spy, Severus and had no qualms about putting you at
risk every time you went to a meeting. When you joined them, he removed the
curse and that's when you decided you'd done the wrong thing and went to who
you thought was Dumbledore, begging for forgiveness for something he'd made you
do. It was despicable, Severus."
Severus was paler than Harry had ever seen him and Harry worried that maybe he
should never have told him. "Is this true, Harry? How do you know all this?"
"By Legilimency, he didn't know I could do it without a wand. I was in his mind
that day we returned from Malfoy Manor, after I k - killed Voldemort. He wasn't
even trying to hide anything, he didn't think he needed to."
"It was his doing all along? I always wondered why I joined and then almost
immediately came back to Hogwarts, it didn't make much sense at the time."
"Yes, Severus, he moulded you as his perfect spy just as he moulded me for his
perfect weapon to defeat Voldemort. We were nothing but pawns to both of them
and I am sick of being used!"
Harry took a deep breath. "He admitted it to me, Severus, he knew all along
what my relatives had done and he continued to send me back there year after
year. It was all a lie about my mother's blood protecting me. Well, that blood
flowed in my Aunt Petunia's veins and she never lifted a finger to help me, not
once! He said he hoped they would beat the magic out of me so that I would
never be a threat to him." Harry wriggled out of Severus' embrace, climbed down
from the bed and knelt on the floor by the side of it.
"Harry, what are you doing?" Severus asked him, sounding horrified.
"I - I have to be punished. I killed people, I have to be punished, Master."
"Harry, you did nothing wrong. I am not going to punish you for defeating the
two most evil wizards the world has ever seen. Please get up."
Harry stood up on shaky legs and sat on the chair by the side of the bed,
Severus was sitting on the bed itself, but Harry didn't feel like being hugged
at the moment, or even being close to him at all. "I thought you were
different," said Harry, the tears falling anew. "But you're just like all the
rest, ready to let me get away with it because I was the Boy Who Lived, that I
could do nothing wrong. You always punished me before, I knew I could count on
you."
"You can count on me, Harry."
"No, I can't! Don't any of you understand? I didn't just skip class or
detention, I murdered two people and they didn't even arrest me! I used Dark
magic to kill them, is that what you want? Do you want me to use it again, will
that make you punish me, Severus? I can do it you know, all I have to do is
reach out and - "
Harry's words were cut off as Severus yanked him out of the chair by the wrists
and flung him face down on the bed.
"Don't you ever, ever threaten to use Dark magic in front of me again!" Severus
hissed in his ear, pressing Harry's shoulders with his hands. "Do you think
Dark magic is some sort of joke? Well, do you? Answer me!"
"N - no, sir," Harry whispered and for the first time he felt a little afraid
of Severus. This wasn't play, Severus was really angry with him and Harry felt
his heart shatter into a million tiny pieces. He shouldn't have said it, he
shouldn't.
"I'm sorry, Severus. I'm sorry!" Harry's shoulders ached where Severus was
holding them, his breathing was laboured, his mouth and nose being squashed in
the pillows.
The pressure on his back was suddenly removed. Harry turned over just in time
to see Severus walking out of the infirmary.
Away from the hospital wing. Away from him.
 
Part Twenty Eight
Severus didn't know where he was going when he left the infirmary, he just knew
he had to get away for a while. Harry's words had made him so angry that he
didn't know what he might have done. He knew about that darkness, for he had it
in him too and to have Harry threaten to use it, use it as a bargaining tool in
their relationship was just too much.
He couldn't talk rationally to him about it, not yet. Not when even now Harry's
words had awoken the demons he'd long thought were sleeping, if not destroyed.
Harry knew that he had problems with Dark magic and yet he was talking about it
so casually, as if discussing the weather or something.
Did Harry feel it too? That pull whenever Dark magic was discussed? Severus had
been sorely tempted to accept Minerva's offer of the DADA position, even
knowing full well that if he tasted Dark magic once more, he might never find
his way to the Light again. But the truth remained that the desire was there
and he had almost given in to it, for just a few brief seconds he had wanted to
feel that rush again.
Severus wandered out to the lake, his fingernails pressing little half moons
into the flesh of his palms. The pain distracted him from thinking about and
wanting Dark magic. He stopped suddenly, realising how much of a fool he'd been
and turned, heading back to the infirmary.
***
Harry was sobbing into his pillow when Severus returned, so he didn't see him
at first. He had never felt pain like this before, the Cruciatus was nothing
compared to the ache in his heart. Harry had turned Severus against him, he had
made Severus so angry that he was never coming back. Severus was never coming
back to him. Harry had lost the man he loved by being stupid and selfish and he
wished he could take the words back, pretend they'd never been spoken.
"Harry," came the soft voice and Harry was sure he must have been imagining it,
for he could not think why Severus would be there. "Harry," louder this time.
"Look at me, Harry."
Harry turned his head and looked into the dark eyes of his lo - ex-lover,
feeling his heart shatter anew at the sadness he found within their depths.
Tears were dripping down Harry's face, his nose was running and he felt as if
he could barely breathe.
"You're here," said Harry wonderingly. "I thought you were never coming back."
"What part of I'm never leaving you don't you understand?" asked Severus
softly. "I promised I would never leave you, I meant it. I was just angry, but
I'm not leaving you, Harry. Never."
"Severus!" sobbed Harry, hurling himself into the man's waiting arms and crying
on his shoulder.
"It's the pain, isn't it, Harry? The pain helps you, gives you something else
to focus on?" Severus said as he rubbed Harry's back.
"What?" Harry had the impression he had joined the conversation somewhere in
the middle and wasn't sure what was going on in it. He wiped his nose on the
sleeve of his pyjama top and stared at Severus.
"You need the physical pain because it helps you. It stops you drowning in
guilt, it might also help with the craving for Dark magic."
"What are you saying, Severus?" asked Harry, hardly daring to hope.
"I'm saying that perhaps you were right, you do need to be punished. But not
now, not when you're in the hospital wing."
"When we go home?" asked Harry eagerly, already wondering when that would be.
"Home? You mean Cornwall, Harry? You don't want to stay here and finish
school?" Severus hugged him tighter a gesture that Harry could never get enough
of.
"I want to go home," said Harry. "I want to work in the shop with you, I don't
want to stay here any longer than we have to, Severus. Too much has happened
here, I just want to go."
"Are you sure, Harry? What about your friends? A career as an Auror, don't you
want to do that anymore?"
"No!" Harry was surprised at his own vehemence. "I've dealt with enough Dark
wizards, I don't want to do that anymore, Severus. My friends can come and
visit, can't they? You won't mind, would you?"
"No, Harry. Your friends can visit whenever they wish to, it's your home too.
We needed secrecy before, but now that both Grindelwald and Voldemort are gone,
we no longer need to hide."
"Only from Mrs. Jensen," grinned Harry. "I wonder what she'd say if she knew
she had two wizards living next door."
"Probably something not very complimentary."
"Severus," began Harry, he'd been wondering this for a while now. "How did you
get into the Room of Requirement? I didn't think it opened on the outside if it
was in use."
"It doesn't usually, but I was with Hagrid that day. He nearly hexed me with
his umbrella when I went to his cottage that day, he thought I was a traitor,
that I had kidnapped you and was now back to do some more mischief, it took a
while to convince him that we had run away together and that you were in danger
up at the school. I've never seen anyone so big move so fast and once we got
there, Hagrid removed the wards and I could Apparate into the room and the
Aurors could get into the school. Hagrid's the Keeper of the Keys, he can get
anyone into anywhere in the castle, he's responsible for the upkeep of the
wards and if he wishes it, he can get anyone into the Room of Requirement even
if it is in use."
"I see," said Harry. "And Grindelwald let him be the Keeper?"
"Yes, Professor Dippet instated him, it would have looked suspicious if the
first thing Dumbledore had done was to entrust a new Keeper of the castle. New
Keepers are usually only replaced once the old ones have died and Grindelwald
was biding his time, pretending the whole time to be Albus Dumbledore."
"I'm sorry, Severus. I'm sorry about what I said about the Dark magic. I don't
know why I said that, I wouldn't do it, Severus. I don't want to do it but it
feels like there's something inside me that keeps reaching out for it."
"There is, Harry. Every wizard has the ability and the drive to use Dark magic,
some more than others, but it is something that can be controlled. It won't be
easy and I'm not going to lie to you and say that one day you'll not feel like
using it, because that isn't true. You will always have this urge, Harry, just
like I do, but you can resist it. You might have to do something else, anything
else to try and distract yourself, but eventually the urge will fade into the
background a little and you can carry on as normal."
"I've never felt normal," said Harry. "To the Dursleys I was a freak because I
was a wizard and here I was different again because I was the Boy Who Lived. I
just want to be Harry, Severus, is that too much to ask?"
"No, Harry it isn't. You've given them enough, now isn't time for you to be
happy?" Severus hopped down from the bed and knelt on one knee. "How would you
feel about being Harry Snape?" he asked.
Harry squealed and jumped down from the bed, wrapping his arms around Severus.
"Yes! Yes, Severus, yes!"
***
Three days later, Harry was released from the infirmary and Professor
McGonagall performed their bonding ceremony in the gardens of Hogwarts. It was
not a large wedding, Severus and Harry didn't want much of a fuss, so only the
staff, Remus, the Weasleys and Ron and Hermione were there.
Severus had removed the Snape bonding bracelets from his vault at Gringotts and
Harry had done the same from his, and when Ron as the best man, presented the
bonding bracelets to Professor McGonagall at the start of the ceremony, there
was a gasp from the assembled crowd. Both bracelets were identical, clasped
hands holding a heart with a diamond in the centre. Harry didn't know why the
bracelets were the same, he'd always thought wizarding bonding heirlooms were
unique to each family, but he was too excited to worry about it now.
"Do you Severus Snape take Harry Potter unto yourself? Do you accept him and
only him? Will you cherish and protect him in this world and all worlds? Do you
forsake all others and be faithful only to him?"
"I do."
Harry's heart was beating frantically as Professor McGonagall repeated the vows
and there was only one answer he could give. He loved this man with all his
heart and he could not imagine being without him.
"I do," Harry said and the small congregation let out hollers of celebration as
they placed the bonding bracelets on each other's wrists.
As soon as the clasps were shut, a scroll popped into being above their heads,
McGonagall removed it and set it on the small table she'd just conjured for
that purpose. "If you'd like to sign here, Severus, and you here, Harry," she
said, indicating the correct places with her quill. When they'd signed the
wizarding marriage register, the scroll disappeared and Harry knew it would end
up at the Ministry, but that didn't worry him anymore. They were married, they
were official. No-one could separate them ever again.
"Congratulations, both of you," said Professor McGonagall, giving them both a
firm hug. Harry had never been hugged by his former Head of House before and it
was a little disconcerting, the woman was stronger than she looked. "Now, Dobby
has outdone himself with the decoration of the Great Hall for your wedding
feast."
Harry had a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. "Dobby did the
decorating?" he asked, visions of Christmas baubles that Dobby had put up in
the Room of Requirement floating in his mind's eye.
"He did," said Hermione giving Harry a peck on the cheek and shaking Severus'
hand. "But don't worry, Mrs. Weasley and I helped, we didn't let him get away
with too much."
"Thanks, I think," said Harry as he and Severus made their way inside to the
Hall. The House tables had been transfigured into lots of circular tables
draped with white embroidered table cloths, garlands of white flowers were
draped across every chair, every wall. It was very understated for Dobby's
taste and he sniffed his displeasure at the two grooms.
"It is not being very colourful, Harry Potter, sir but they is insisting it has
to be white. It is being the tradition for wizards to be having everything
white for weddings. House elves is not having white for weddings, sirs. House
elf weddings is to be having lots of colour sirs."
"House elves get married?" asked Harry, surprised.
"Of course, sir. How else is there to be having lots of baby elves?" Dobby
shook his head and clasped his hand over his mouth. "I is being very sorry,
Harry Potter. You is very young and are only just being married today. I is not
to be telling you about babies, that is being for your husband to tell you."
With that, Dobby clicked his fingers and Disapparated away.
Harry grinned and looked at his new husband. "So, Severus, do you want to tell
me all about the babies?"
Severus sidled close to him and whispered in his ear. "I can do better than
that, Harry. Later, I can show you."
Harry's knees almost buckled at the promise in that voice. Good grief, how were
they going to get through hours of a feast and dancing when all Harry wanted to
do was get Severus alone in a corner somewhere? He was hard already and he
wondered if Madam Pomfrey's books had got it right, that it was more difficult
for eunuchs to get erections, for Harry certainly didn't seem to have any
trouble whenever he was close to Severus. It was going to be a long few hours.
***
Severus took Harry's hand and led them away to the edge of the wards as soon as
the speeches were finished, the didn't even stay for the dancing.
Unfortunately they were followed by all of their guests, no chance of a quiet
getaway.
"Aren't you staying for the rest of the feast?" asked Hermione, a sentiment
echoed by the rest.
"No, we want to get home," said Harry. "You all enjoy it."
"This is most irregular, Severus," scolded Minerva. "The grooms are supposed to
stay until dusk."
"Minerva, be grateful you even had us this long, we could have eloped you know.
We're married and we are going home."
Professor McGonagall hugged both of them with tears in her eyes, as did
everyone else. "Make sure to write, Harry," said Hermione. "We'll come and
visit you both soon."
"Not too soon, Miss Granger," warned Severus, placing his arm in a propriety
way around Harry. "I believe newlyweds are entitled to their privacy for a
while?"
Hermione blushed as the rest of the group tittered loudly, but finally, finally
they were able to Apparate away.
 
 
Part Twenty Nine
Harry wobbled a little as they finished Apparating, he still couldn't get used
to the sensation of his body being displaced from one place to the other.
Before he'd quite recovered, Severus had him pinned against the wall and was
kissing him senseless. Harry moaned under the onslaught, his entire existence
dwindling to just this. Severus touching him, Severus kissing him. Just the two
of them, the outside world disappearing.
Harry wrapped his arms around Severus' neck and tugged him closer, Harry's hips
falling open so that Severus could fit between them. He wriggled closer,
feeling Severus' erection against his stomach and his own pressing against his
husband. Little sparks of arousal shot throughout Harry's whole body as he felt
how impressive his husband's erection was. Harry made a strangled sound in his
throat, something between a wail and a whimper as he imagined what Severus was
going to do with it later.
"Do you feel that?" Severus pulled his lips away slightly to whisper and
pressed his body even closer to Harry's. "That's for you. I'm going to be
inside you, pounding you into the mattress, the headboard will be rattling
against the wall I'm going to take you so hard. You're going to feel every inch
of my cock filling you and then you're going to come and come all night long.
Come and come."
It hadn't been a command but that didn't seem to matter as Harry's body
convulsed, arching his hips, a choked cry from his lips as the orgasm ripped
through him at Severus' words. His knees threatened to give way, but Severus
was there, holding him through the tremors as his cock twitched and he came and
came, totally dry but feeling even more intense for that. Severus began sucking
and licking his neck. "Did you come like that, Harry? Even before I did
anything?" Severus sounded entirely too amused for Harry's liking.
"But you did do something," he protested, gasping the words out.
"I did?" Another long lick to Harry's neck and he was instantly hard again and
moaning in the man's arms.
"Yes, your voice," Harry groaned, feeling sweat trickle down his back. "Your
voice is so sexy. Fuck!" Harry wailed as Severus sucked hard where his shoulder
met his neck, it felt divine even through his clothes.
"Language," snarled Snape and stepped away from him. Harry whimpered at the
loss of all that delicious pressure against his body. "I think I may have to
punish you for that."
Harry could hardly believe that Severus wanted to play one of their games
tonight of all nights, their wedding night, but he realised it was his own
fault for asking. Of course, he could use his word and it would all stop, but
he wasn't sure he wanted it to stop just yet.
"Sorry, sir," said Harry as he meekly lowered his head.
"You will be. Do you think I will allow you to get away with such insolence?
Well, do you?"
"No, sir."
"You will go into our bedroom and you will undress. Everything is to come off,
including your glasses. Once that is done, you will kneel down by the side of
the bed and place your hands palm down on the covers. You are to remain in that
position until I arrive and you will not touch yourself, no matter how hard you
may become. Do you understand?"
"Yes, sir."
"Well, what are you waiting for? Go!" his Master commanded and Harry obeyed,
running up the stairs and almost tripping in his haste. It didn't take long to
undress, he unbuttoned the first few buttons of his shirt and then just yanked
it over his head, before tugging off his shoes and socks and pulling down his
trousers and underwear in one fell swoop. Harry's prick was hard as he knelt by
the bed and got into the position Severus had ordered him to wait in. He'd
almost forgotten to remove his glasses, he quickly discarded them and set them
on the bedside table.
He did not hear Severus enter the room, but Harry could smell him and his heart
sped up in his chest at the nearness of the man. He could feel the blood
rushing through his veins and he was even a little dizzy as he sensed Severus
moving closer and closer to the bed. Something whistled in the air by his ear
and landed with a thud on the bed. Harry knew what it was even before he turned
his head to look.
It was the cane.
***
Severus wondered what Harry would do. Would he accept the cane, or would he
decide that he'd been punished enough? Severus did not want to cane him, but he
would do it if Harry asked it of him. He would not deny Harry anything except
Dark magic, for neither of them could afford to use that. Ever.
"Well, pet? Are you ready to accept your punishment?" Severus made sure to ask
him even now, to give him the chance to use his word and stop him from doing
this. It was a while before Harry answered, but his voice was unwavering.
"Yes, sir."
"Very well, you will receive three strokes as you have never been caned before.
After each stroke you will say the number aloud. Miss your count and you will
receive and extra stroke until you have called out three. Are we clear?"
Severus knew that the counting helped, as did knowing how many blows Harry
would receive.
"Yes, sir."
"Brace yourself," Severus waited until Harry gripped the bedsheets and shuffled
forward a little so that he was resting on the bed a little. He swung the cane
through the air and brought it down hard on Harry's naked buttocks, wincing at
Harry's pained cry of "One!"
Severus could almost feel Harry's pain himself and he wished Harry didn't feel
the need for this at all, but he knew that it was better this than using Dark
magic. He tried to angle his next stroke so that it hit a different part of
Harry's skin, unwilling to make him endure any more pain than necessary. "Two!"
shrieked Harry as he inched forward slightly as if he was trying to get away,
but he still did not use his word.
Severus caned him for the third time, hardly able to look at the damage he'd
inflicted on the delicate skin of his husband. "Three!" Harry called out and
his upper body collapsed on the bed. "Please," he sobbed against the quilt.
"Please."
Severus removed the salve from his trouser pocket and began to rub it on
Harry's inflamed skin, soothing the pain he'd just inflicted. "Ssh, Harry. It's
over now, it's over." The guilt welled up in his throat and chest, crushing him
and Severus hoped Harry would never ask him to do that again. He couldn't bear
to see Harry hurt, he didn't know if he was going to be strong enough to keep
giving Harry punishments whenever he needed them.
The salve was doing its work and soon Harry's sobbing turned to moans of
pleasure as he writhed against the bed.
"God, Severus, that's so good!"
Severus kissed the back of his neck. "That's the idea," he whispered, scooping
Harry up in his arms and lying him flat on the bed. Severus took his time,
kissing Harry all over even before he started teasing his entrance with an
oiled finger. "More!" gasped Harry, bucking his hips.
"More?" Severus questioned, adding another finger and watched Harry's eyes
flutter closed in bliss. Harry didn't seem to be in any pain, his salve had
seen to that and the third finger slid in without a problem. Severus angled his
finger searching for the little gland inside and was gratified to see Harry
arching almost entirely off the bed.
"OH GOD! What was that?" he panted.
"That, my dear Harry, was your prostate."
"Inside me, Severus, please!" begged Harry. "I want to come with you inside
me."
"Then you shall get your wish," said Severus as he prepared himself with the
salve, shuddering as his hand closed around himself. Merlin, he was so close,
he wasn't even sure he would last long enough for Harry to come again. He
squeezed his sac, staving off his orgasm for now. He pulled one of the pillows
from his side of the bed and placed it beneath Harry's hips.
Severus slowly entered his husband for the first time, feeling as if time had
stopped and they could relive this moment over and over again.
Harry winced. "It hurts!" he gasped out.
Severus stopped moving, just the head of his prick inside Harry's body. "Relax,
Harry. You'll stretch, but it will hurt more if you tense up. I'll go slow,
okay?"
Harry nodded and Severus inched his way forward again, waiting for Harry's
cries of distress, there were none and suddenly he was there, he was all the
way inside that hot, tight, heat. Severus moaned and kissed Harry hungrily on
the lips. He daren't move, he'd be lost if he moved.
***
Harry had never felt such completeness than when Severus had finally broken the
last barrier between them. He would never be alone again, he knew it now.
Severus would always be with him. It was forever and Harry moved his hips when
he felt Severus all the way in. It had hurt at first, but now he just felt
really full and he needed that, needed to feel that. "Severus! Move, please!"
he begged, wanting Severus to hit that magic spot inside again
Severus began to thrust in and out of him fairly slowly, but each time he kept
hitting Harry's prostate and Harry mewled in delight. It felt so wonderful to
have Severus inside him, to feel the weight of the man's body on top of him, to
see Severus’ face transported with ecstasy.
Suddenly Severus' thrusts speeded up and Harry was arching his hips to meet him
thrust for thrust He felt as if he was falling over the side of a cliff and he
didn't want to reach the bottom. "God, Harry! I can't! I can't hold on any
longer! Come for me, Harry! Come for me!"
Harry bucked up, once twice as he obeyed, and this time there was even a small
amount of clear fluid from his prick. It was barely a second later when he felt
his husband pulsing deep inside him and he was bathed with wet warmth as
Severus found his own release.
Severus collapsed half on top of him, breathing heavily in Harry's ear.
"Harry? Are you all right?"
Harry nodded, blinking away the tears. "I love you, Severus! I love you!" he
sobbed and wrapped his arms tight around his husband. It had just been so
intense, he had no idea it was going to feel like that. How connected to
Severus he would feel.
Severus let him cry, patting him on the back every so often, neither of them
speaking and soon Harry fell asleep wrapped up in his husband's arms.
***
Harry woke up in the middle of the night with a nightmare and he tried to get
out of bed without waking Severus, but he discovered that Severus was already
awake and had been reading a book by candlelight on the other side of the room.
He set his book down and glanced at Harry, concerned.
"Harry? What is it?"
"Nightmare," he said dully. "Vernon."
"Oh, do you want a hug?" asked Severus standing up and Harry almost ran into
his arms, wrapping his arms tight around his husband's waist.
"I love being married to you," sighed Harry.
"Me too. Do you want to talk about your dream, Harry?"
"No, but I did want to ask you, what did you to Vernon that day at the shop?"
"Oh, that. It's a very obscure curse, it mimics syphilis, but it won't respond
to any Muggle treatments."
"Syphilis? What's that?" asked Harry.
"It's a sexually transmitted disease, very nasty if it doesn't get treated. Can
lead to impotence, insanity and death. Dursley will never be able to be cured.
He won't die from the curse, but he will suffer the symptoms for years."
"It sounds terrible," said Harry quietly.
"And what he did you to you wasn't?" asked Severus. "Don't ask me to be sorry
for doing it, Harry, for I'm not. I'd curse him again for what he did to you,
for what he allowed to happen to you with those men. Vernon Dursley does not
deserve your mercy."
"No, no, he doesn't," agreed Harry. He searched the room. "Where's the cane?"
Harry felt Severus tense up as he mentioned it. "What do you want it for?"
"Please, Severus. I just have to show you something."
Severus fetched the cane from the floor on the side of the bed and handed it to
Harry, his eyes sad. Harry never wanted to see that look in Severus' eyes
again. Harry cast a wandless spell to break the cane in two and handed the
pieces to Severus.
"I don't need it any more, Severus. I don't need to be punished anymore. I've
been through enough pain."
"Are you sure, Harry?"
Harry nodded his head and stood up on tip-toes to give Severus a fleeting kiss.
"I'm sure, Severus. I can cope with anything now that I have you."
The End
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